Children at bridal shower but not at wedding?

Re: Children at bridal shower but not at wedding?

• ILoveBeachMusic member

  

  March 2019

  If they aren't invited to the wedding they shouldn't be invited to the shower. By allowing them to come to the shower you could create some confusion about whether they are invited or not to the wedding.

  Report6 Reply
• LondonLisa member

  

  March 2019 edited March 2019

  mkbobe90 said:

  I’m 1 of 27 first cousins. All my female cousins, who I’m extremely close with, are invited to my shower. However, some have little girls I’d love to have there but I have a strict NO children policy at my wedding with the exception of our niece and nephews (all of whom are in our wedding). So my question is, is it ok to invite the girls to the shower but not the wedding? 

  Firstly, you don't have to be so gendered. Some boys would love to come. Some girls would find this snoozeville. 
  
  Prewedding parties are for wedding invitees only. So do not invite any of the children.  If you aren't having children at the wedding, that is your prerogative. But you can't be sad when your cousins decline. And also decline your shower because they aren't invited. 
  
  Either you want to celebrate with these children or you don't. Either you'd 'love' to have them there or you don't. You chose that it was not important to have them there. That is fine, but own your choice. 

  Report6 Reply
• downtondiva member

  

  March 2019

  I'm surprised that you are so adamant about not having kids at your wedding but would "love" to have them at your bridal shower. 
  
  If you are going to stick to not inviting these kids to the wedding, you should not invite them to the shower either. It's not right to invite anyone to pre-wedding parties without inviting them to the wedding, and if you invite the kids to the shower, it's bound to cause confusion and hurt feelings when they don't get to go to the wedding.

  
  

  Report1 Reply
• maine7mob member

  

  March 2019

  I'm with the others on this one. The purpose of a bridal shower really is to give gifts. Do not solicit gifts from people who are not invited to the event that those gifts are commemorating.

  Report1 Reply
• climbingsingle member

  

  March 2019

  Don't invite them to the shower if they're not welcome at your wedding. 

  Report2 Reply
• banana468 member

  

  March 2019

  I'll echo PPs.   Please don't have a child-friendly shower but not a child friendly wedding. 
  
  I get it.   DH's family is HUGE.   But that's a choice that you need to make.
  
  You won't be hosting your own shower but I'd just make it clear to the shower hosts that the only children invited to the wedding are those of your siblings and therefore only those kids (if any) should be invited to the shower. 

  Report2 Reply
• ei34 member

  

  March 2019

  I have over 30 first cousins.  Everyone was invited to everything when I got married.  My youngest sister is getting married in June and she’s keeping things smaller.  Her shower is in a few weeks and only guests invited to her wedding were invited to her shower- including the children of our cousins (invited to neither).  

  Report3 Reply
• Jen4948 member

  

  March 2019 edited March 2019

  If you're not inviting the children to your wedding, then they shouldn't be invited to the shower, which, by the way, you shouldn't be giving or planning.
  
  Wedding-related events really aren't ways to "include" non-wedding guests.

  Report1 Reply