My mother was an alcoholic, and my father cheated regularly, trading to a younger woman every few years. I always hoped for divorce as a child. 18 months ago, my mother died during an attempt at sobriety. My father married “Suzanne” about three months after the funeral.
I have very complicated feelings but my approach has been to stay polite but distant. I chose to attend the wedding only as a guest and I call once a month. There’s a selfish aspect—my dad helped me pay living expenses this spring until I graduated and my full-time job started. But I’m unfortunately privy to concrete evidence that he continues to cheat.
I told myself Suzanne knew this was likely going in. This morning, they called to announce that they’re expecting a baby and that Suzanne will be quitting her job to be a stay-at-home mom. Prudie, this is exactly how my mom ended up unable to leave my dad. Should I say something? I know my dad gave my mom more than one STI over the years—should I recommend she get tested for her safety during pregnancy? I don’t want to think about any of this, but this woman is my age and I feel weirdly more sympathetic to her than to my own father.
—See Something, Say Nothing