Rehersal & dinner questions

knottie375711d87aef3019

Hello everyone. My wedding is next year.  Some background: My venue told me I had to wait at the earliest, 3 weeks before the wedding to schedule my rehersal, is that normal?  I'm a planner so that's kind of freaks me out lol. Most of my guests are local and the groom wedding party is local, and my party is coming from out of town. The wedding is on a Thursday and my bridesmaids are planning on flying in that monday (their choice). It's hard to plan the hearsal dinner when I don't know the day or time of the rehearsal. Three weeks prior feels so last minute to me lol. 

For the dinner itself I want to keep it at 30 person max. That number would include the wedding parties and their families (spouse & kids), parents, and immediate family from out of town. Small issue is I have some close friends that are coming from out of town thats asking to come to the rehersal dinner.... Like I if I let them come I feel like I would have to open it up for everyone coming. Like my fiance and I are pay for this, and I don't know what to do with out offending my other guests. The 3 I am referring to has helped me aspects of wedding planning, and one of them planned the Bachelorette party (not the maid of honor). Would that be more acceptable to them to come? Plus the fact I don't know when the rehersal will even take place, it may happen before they even arrive.

I don't how to hand this or what to do. If anything needs clarifying I am more than happy to. Thanks in advance yall!

banana468

Did you lead on the 3 people to think they'd be invited to the RD?   I think it's tricky to start to pen the RD to some people not in the wedding and not to more people.  It can be tricky.

Could you get together with them after the RD and say you're meeting for drinks at a place when it's over in case people want to join?  

As for the rehearsal can you talk to the venue and find out if they can give you a window of time?  If your dinner itself isn't there talk to them about working with you so you can plan the rehearsal and need to make reservations following.   Depending on that, see if the location where you're wanting the RD can allow you to book a party of 30 for a window of time.  At that size, see if they're OK with you having more time with a guaranteed amount that you'll be spending. 

MyNameIsNot

I would plan a backup option for a rehearsal location that you can use if your venue isn't available at the time you're targeting. So if you're planning to do a private room at a restaurant, look for one with a large enough space that you could do a run through there before the dinner. Then if your venue happens to have availability right before the dinner you take it, otherwise you rehearse in a different spot.