Bachelor Party

mrssunshine2be

I want to know what you lovely ladies would do in my situation.

I just found out that my FI's best man (his brother) is planning to have just a simple afternoon cookout for FI's bachelor party, and I know that this is completely the opposite of what FI was hoping. He doesn't want anything extravagant or crazy, I just know he was hoping for something a little more interesting than the same thing we do every weekend. I suppose I'm kind of upset because the issue isn't money or anything, it's just the best man doesn't feel like planning anything more creative. I don't want to say anything to the best man because he's touchy about these sorts of things, but I also feel weird saying something to the other groomsmen about trying to get FBIL to change his mind.

FI doesn't know any of this, but he had joked early on that with his brother in charge his party would probably just be a cookout, and he said he hoped someone else would step in and take charge, but that doesn't look like it's going to happen.

Should I say something or should I stay out of it and let FI be disappointed?

i2012do

Hm.. This is a really tough one. Is their a groomsmen you are more apt to talkto about it? Perhaps its a cookout in the afternoon and then at night they go and do something a bit different?

Perhaps you can talk to FI's mother (since his brother is the one planning).

I'm super passive agressive which is a bad quality but I think I would jokingly mention that FI was hoping not to have a cookout for his bachelor and maybe they wanted to go to a bar, club, tennis match, polo, bowling, whatever it may be!

I know my fiance is really hoping on going on a deep sea fishing trip for his bachelor party- but my brother (who is in the entertainment/club business) was talking about planning a huge party at some club etc  with tables and a party bus which is TOTALLY not Fiances style).
 
Anyway, MY mom stepped in and said something. My brother said he was just trying to be helpful (since hes the only groomsman from RI) but she said "you know he really has his heart set on something else).

Long story short- maybe talking to FI's mom or dad is a good option. They can tell their son that his idea is nice- but since its a really special event maybe they can bump it up a notch. WHo knows, maybe that means still having a cookout but having a caterer come in and do a clambake and inviting a ton of people over for a bigger party or some variation on the "Same old cookout"

Emma428

Hello!!! i didn't read your whole post because it infurriates me!! I am in  a very similar situation. My FI bestman lives in LA and he assumed my FI @ brother's that are in wedding party were planning something. They aren't!!!! Which makes me sooo mad. My FI literally had to book his whole party. Knowing this.... I called the limo he booked for the nigh and am decorating it with raunchy decor, etc. I suggest u do something crazy for the cookout. Hi jack it before hand. Hand naked girly photos all over. Jellow shots in shape of tits. Blow up dolls. That way there is a lil excitement. Hire strippers if your into it. Good luck and may I suggest taking a lil of the matters into your own hands. Your FI will love you for it.