WR - Timeline issue...

AmandaSC1988

So we don’t normally talk too much about wedding details, but once many of you lovely ladies are already married I wanted to ask you guys, as opposed to my wedding month board who are pretty much clueless. I’m a planner, I planned my Sunday down to the minute because I like plans if you get my drift.

Anyway,I started thinking about the logistics of my wedding and it scares me. We are having a Catholic Ceremony with Mass at 7:00pm, getting out at around 8:15ish. The reception venue is in the same area as the ceremony so no travel time (well besides downs the stairs). FI is pretty much against the first look, he wants that moment when the church doors swing open and he sees me for the first time. So we will have to take couple-y photos after.

I really want a sit down dinner and already have the caterer lined up who will give us a great deal on a two course meal (I’m now thinking we will have them do only one course with hor dourves). But I suppose my question is, is a sit down dinner really possible? Are people going to eat at 9pm? BTW I can’t change my time.

I know I am being irrational, bridezilla moment

calindi

I really doubt people are going to want a full dinner at 9pm.  And I'd think it was unlikely that you'll get all the pictures you want in 45 minutes - most people I've seen have at least an hour for photos.  And are you doing a receiving line?  That will take up even more time and dinner wouldn't be until much later.

Perhaps have heavy hors dourves during a receiving line, and then dancing?  I know you want the sit-down, but I know that I personally would be wanting to call it a night by 11pm, midnight at the latest.  I feel like if you want dancing, heavy hors dourves would be the best option.

melbelle24

I have to agree with Cal. 9:00 is late for a full dinner, especially if you want time for dancing and mingling with guests. Also, with a 7:00 Catholic wedding, how many of your guests do you think would just eat beforehand? Especially those with small children. I think heavy apps might work better, logistically speaking.

AmandaSC1988

Yea, that is what I am thinking. =/

What do you ladies think of doing something like tappas ( I suppose that is just the Spanish name for appetizers) and have them served at the table family style?

I'm just not a huge fan of lines at a wedding, as a guest I hate waiting in line and juggling my plate. (If you haven't guessed, I don't want to do a receiving line =P)

calindi

What about a few display tables and passed appetizers?  People could mingle and talk, you can have some seated tables for those who want to sit and some cocktail tables for people to gather?  That way there's no lines, and everyone has a place to put down their plate.

I like tapas style, but I think if you want any dancing at all, having assigned seats and a seated meal (even if it's a light meal) would be a bit late after 9pm.

BinxRose

yes I definately agree on the heavy apps. I would not want to eat dinner at 9:00. I would go nuts on having lots of different styles of apps if I were you! I love apps! As a guest, I would actually prefer that the apps were spread out in stations, or at a long two-sided table. That way I can keep coming back for more if I want, rather than feeling like once they are gone at my table, I can't have any more.

BinxRose

Oh Cali, good call on seated and cocktail tables. If I am not having a sit-down meal, I think it would be better to have more casual unassigned seating. Also, the app stations and more casual seatig will encourage more mingling.

Beachy730

I would skip a dinner and just do a cocktail reception, with different apps.  I would more consider a stationed apps things so that people can eat when and how they please.  If it's not sttarting until 7, and we wouldn't be getting into the reception part until 8:30ish, I would eat before i went and be ready to just party after and snack.  Sitting for a dinner that late is tough, and won't be appealing to older guests who usually are ready to call it a night by like 9.

Another option would be to do a cocktail hour from 6-6:45 or 7, with some drinks and apps, then have people go to the ceremony.  Then after the ceremony you could do a one course dinner.  If you don't have people coming until 7 they will ikely eat before, but if they come by 6 they will probably expect a full dinner.  

If your FI is dead set on first look pics, then get as many pics as you can done beforehand without those.  For example, all the ones of you and the BMs and your family, plus your FI and his GMs and his family.  Then you and your FI can do some shots at the ceremony site or in between, but I would definitely limit it to like half an hour of pictures, and make sure your guests are getting food and drinks in that time (or just have dinner started without you).

Beachy730

Personally I like assigned seats regardless of the meal, since I like having a place that I can put my stuff down for the night and know where to go back to if needed.  I've been to one wedding that had open seating for a cocktail reception, and people were constantly looking for seats and asking the wait staff for more chairs for tables.  

If you do opt  for open seating just make sure you have more tables and chairs than you do guests.  For example, if you have 100 guests, I would probably have seating for at least 125 people.  It stinks for people walking in a little later than others if they have a party of 4, and all the tables only have 2 seats left or something like that.

crownsuperstar

I agree with the idea of the apps and not with a full on dinner.  We did not do the first look picture.  Both H and I wanted the first time of him seeing me was when I was headed down the aisle.  It took me a long time to get to the start of the aisle since I had to make it through the lobby.  He got worried I pulled a run away bride.  Silly H.  Any way we did all of our pictures after and it took at least 1 full hour.  We had cocktails and apps for the people to have while waiting on us to get up there. 

AmandaSC1988

Thanks for the input ladies! They all sound like good options. I agree with beach in the aspect that I want people to have an assigned seat so they have a home base. Plus, because i'm not having a receiving line, I don't want people table jumping too much before I can say hi.

I'll have to talk with my caterer to see what they can handle. I know they don't have a lot of man-power, so I am not sure if they could handle passed apps (which I would like...) Also, I like the station idea, but I'm not sure how my venue will handle that, it was already a tad bit cramped with all the tables in there and still having room for dancing.  I like the on the table tapas, but I agree with the whole running out of your favorite kind ordeal.   I'll have to think of an option that best fits everything.

I was reading a couple of articles about it and they suggested using a mixture of options, so I'll have to sit down and think which would be the best combinations of options.

kyrgyzstan

H was against first look too, and I'm glad we didn't do one, seeing his face on the video was awesomeness. We got all our pics done in an hour with two locations, and travel time. You just have to go go go.