What's the difference?

VLS05

Hi!  I'm really bored at work and I love coming on here and reading your crazy posts.  I decided to post a little rant to get a dicussion started.  So, here it goes.
My SO and I have been together for 7 months.  We moved in together after about 4 months.  We looked at rings, talked wedding dates and even some plans for a big day.  I know he has thought about a proposal because he has given me little "hints" every once in awhile.  I'm not complaining that he hasn't proposed or anything, I am just curious as to what the difference is between a ring being on a finger and one not being there?  What's the difference between living together being boyfriend/girlfriend and living together married?  I really don't like being the center of attention and never really wanted to get married.  I think weddings are way too expensive.  Most people on these posts says it's more important to talk and think about the marriage then the wedding.  But can two people honestly live together and be together for the rest of their lives without spending a million dollars for one stupid day?  Or do families and friends find that completely inappropriate?

Thanks in advance for the input!

GreenPepperBurger

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_whats-difference?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:0b057cf1-15bd-421b-be4e-4727d8791cd4Post:5b9f6b04-3466-4616-a36c-2e06baa617f0">What's the difference?</a>:
[QUOTE]I am just curious as to what the difference is between a ring being on a finger and one not being there? <strong>- Some people consider it "official" when the ring is on the finger. It's like, the proof (or something). You do not need a ring to be engaged. You just need a mutual agreement to get married. </strong>

What's the difference between living together being boyfriend/girlfriend and living together married? <strong>You tend to share the same last name, you're involved in each other's finances a lot more and your union is legally recognized by the state in cases of death or accidents, whatever. </strong>

I really don't like being the center of attention and never really wanted to get married.  I think weddings are way too expensive. <strong>- You don't need a wedding to get married. You need a bride, a groom, rings, an officiant and a witness. That's it. </strong>

Most people on these posts says it's more important to talk and think about the marriage then the wedding.  But can two people honestly live together and be together for the rest of their lives without spending a million dollars for one stupid day?<strong> - See above.

</strong>Or do families and friends find that completely inappropriate? <strong>- I think it depends on how you were raised. More religious families would give it the side-eye, I'd think. But a lot of states have what they call "common law marriages," where two people live together for 7+ years (I'm pretty sure). </strong>
Posted by VLS05[/QUOTE]

**Mutley**

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_whats-difference?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:0b057cf1-15bd-421b-be4e-4727d8791cd4Post:5b9f6b04-3466-4616-a36c-2e06baa617f0">What's the difference?</a>:
[QUOTE]Hi!  I'm really bored at work and I love coming on here and reading your crazy posts.  I decided to post a little rant to get a dicussion started.  So, here it goes. My SO and I have been together for 7 months.  We moved in together after about 4 months.  We looked at rings, talked wedding dates and even some plans for a big day.  I know he has thought about a proposal because he has given me little "hints" every once in awhile.  I'm not complaining that he hasn't proposed or anything,
I am just curious as to what the difference is between a ring being on a finger and one not being there? 
<strong>If you have actually lurked, you would know that most people here feel like a ring does not make someone engaged.  It is a decision between two people.

</strong>What's the difference between living together being boyfriend/girlfriend and living together married? 
<strong>It depends on HOW those two people live together.  There can be many differences, there can be few.  For us, we functioned like a married couple before we were ever married.  The biggest change for us was that we started TTC.  </strong>

I really don't like being the center of attention and never really wanted to get married.  I think weddings are way too expensive.  Most people on these posts says it's more important to talk and think about the marriage then the wedding.  But can two people honestly live together and be together for the rest of their lives without spending a million dollars for one stupid day? 
<strong>Yes.  Look at the number of gay and lesbian couples who have remained in monogamous relationships for decades despite being denied the right to marry.   You could always chose to have a small wedding ceremony.  It does not have to be over the top.  You can also go to the courthouse for a small fee and get married there. </strong>

Or do families and friends find that completely inappropriate?
<strong>Does it matter if you are happy?</strong>

Thanks in advance for the input!
Posted by VLS05[/QUOTE]

oceana919

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_whats-difference?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:0b057cf1-15bd-421b-be4e-4727d8791cd4Post:5b9f6b04-3466-4616-a36c-2e06baa617f0">What's the difference?</a>:
[QUOTE]Hi!  I'm really bored at work and I love coming on here and reading your crazy posts.  I decided to post a little rant to get a dicussion started. 

<strong>Did you just knowingly/deliberately open Pandoras Box?</strong>

So, here it goes. My SO and I have been together for 7 months.  We moved in together after about 4 months.  We looked at rings, talked wedding dates and even some plans for a big day. 

<strong>Define "some plans". Like, a general idea as to what kind of wedding you would like to have, or you've put a down payment down on a venue? Vast differences there. </strong>

I know he has thought about a proposal because he has given me little "hints" every once in awhile. 

<strong>I would hope he's thinking about proposing if you're already talking dates and details. Seems like the cart before the horse to me.</strong>

I'm not complaining that he hasn't proposed or anything, I am just curious as to what the difference is between a ring being on a finger and one not being there?

<strong>None. I don't become magically unengaged when I take my ring off to wash my hair. A ring is a physical object - it's presence or non-presence is the sole determining factor of whether or not you are engaged. </strong>

What's the difference between living together being boyfriend/girlfriend and living together married? 

<strong>Um, vast difference. When you live together as BF/GF, you're still considered (by law) to be individual "units", if you will. If you break up, there is no property to split (unless you co-own property), there's no legal documentation you have to file to say "hit the road, jack". At most, you may have to opt early out of a lease.
</strong>
<strong>When you are married, you are under a legal binding contract. There are rights and privelages that come along with that contract that you are not entitled to if you are not legally married - hospital visitation, medical decisions and consultation, inheritance of property and government benefits after death, etc. If you decide you're done and want to walk, you have to go about a legal process of terminating that contract.

ie. MAJOR DIFFERENCE. </strong>

I really don't like being the center of attention and never really wanted to get married. 

<strong>You never really wanted to get married, but you're all excited about a ring and engagement and wedding dates? ::wonky eye::</strong>

I think weddings are way too expensive. 

<strong>You can easily get married for less than what it costs to buy a used car. You aren't required to have a "wedding" by traditional standards - it can be you, him, a witness and a JOP. Depending on the JOP fees and the cost of a marriage license, that could easily run you under $1000.
</strong>
<strong>Still want/need the big party? There are couples that have weddings and end up paying less than $10,000 for the entire thing. It requires a lot of work and some serious consideration of costs (ie. deciding what is really necessary and what you can live without - you can't necessarily invite and feed your entire sorority). </strong>

Most people on these posts says it's more important to talk and think about the marriage then the wedding.  

<strong>That is absolutely 1000% true. </strong>

But can two people honestly live together and be together for the rest of their lives without spending a million dollars for one stupid day? 

<strong>Um, yes. I would say probably 90% of couples don't drop millions on their weddings. Hell, you can get married for less than $500 - it's called a JOP and a marriage license.</strong>

Or do families and friends find that completely inappropriate?

<strong>I think that would be up to your family and friends to decide. And for you to decide how much that really matters to you. </strong>

Thanks in advance for the input!
Posted by VLS05[/QUOTE]

bajediva

I have a friend who's been living with her boyfriend for a few years now, and in all they've been together longer than I have with mine. When I first talked to her about me and my BF's discussions about marriage, she asked basically the same thing - why do you need to get married? Can't you just live together? She's anti-marriage for various political reasons, but for me, it's not the same.

Yes, part of the joy of marriage is living with the man I love, but I also want the support of our families, and of our community of faith. For us, having a ceremony includes our families and community in the commitment. While nothing can ever be taken for granted, I also believe that marriage is a more stable institution within which to raise children.

Then there are also the political and civic benefits, like being recognised as family in medical, legal & immigration matters. All in all, how much any of these things matters will vary from person to person and couple to couple. Because I'm convinced marriage is right for me, doesn't mean it is for you. And you don't need a big stupid day, intimate ceremonies with just a JP are quite fine.

**Mutley**

I am curious as to why you have picked out a ring...

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_pennsylvania-central_help-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:107Discussion:7cd6534f-7e5d-450e-9dff-4b6e05f6cdecPost:5255b6e0-9d5b-409b-a423-f63cf6877387">Re: HELP!</a>:
[QUOTE]I just checked out your profile and I see you aren't getting married until October.  I was going to suggest the parks, however it might be a tad too cold.  At any rate, I know at Sam Lewis to use the park for your ceremony would be free.  A good friend of mine rented a pavilion for $50 just so that people had a place to gather before the ceremony started, and it also provided a spot for her DJ to set up and a place for people to sign the guest book.  I would also suggest looking for church rec halls and such.  I know a lot of times they are fairly big spaces and they don't charge much or they ask for donations only.  I hope that helps.  <strong>BTW, the Hearts On Fire ring on your idea board is my ring! </strong> Good choice!
Posted by VLS05[/QUOTE]

Or why you are desperately looking for a venue...

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_pennsylvania-central_contemporary-venues?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:107Discussion:8f36c3f2-a1cc-4f9b-b6c3-013cdcefabe0Post:addc3bd3-e605-4b55-a2dd-422e874a7c85">Contemporary Venues?</a>:
[QUOTE]I am desperately looking for a venue that isn't gold, rustic, overdone, or anything like that.  I live in York, and that is where most of my family lives also, so I don't want to have to make everyone drive forever just to come to my reception.  Does anyone know of a place in York who has a bit more of a contemporary look to the room?  Thanks!
Posted by VLS05[/QUOTE]

Or why you refer to him as your FI elsewhere...

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_pennsylvania-central_registry-question-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:107Discussion:5b7c6193-cbf1-4f03-a97d-581e14af2d36Post:d5379abc-1e71-4ef8-8d29-11b0cab55cf0">Registry question</a>:
[QUOTE]My FI and I both owned houses on our own before meeting each other.  We recently moved into his place together and I couldn't be happier, exept for all of the clutter/junk.  We have double, even triple of some things.  So, my question now is, what the heck do we put on a registry?  Other then a set of overpriced sheets and a few extra bath towels I don't know what to do.  And I HATE to ask people to just give money.  Any suggestions on a registry?
Posted by VLS05[/QUOTE]

Aren't you just a precious, pot-stirring dimwit. <a href="#" title="Click to view a larger photo" onclick="return gSiteLife.LoadForumPage('ForumImage', 'plckPhotoId', 'cba4a6fe-d6f4-4173-83cd-b81a372fcf2a', 'plckRedirectUrl', gSiteLife.EscapeValue(window.location.href));"> <img src="http://cdn.cl9.vanillaforums.com/downloaded/ver1.0/content/images/store/11/3/cba4a6fe-d6f4-4173-83cd-b81a372fcf2a.medium.gif" alt="" /></a>
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oceana919

Um, why are you worried about registries if you're not even engaged yet?

**Mutley**

Oceana, obviously because weddings are too expensive.  Duh!

GreenPepperBurger

You never, ever ASK people for money.

oceana919

Perhaps she should register for a clue.

hetshup

I hate favors and am not doing them. Judge away.

catemeg

I think many couples who live together prior to marriage probably don't see many changes in the day-to-day aspects of their life after they get married.  But the legal ramifications are far different, and as a significant other of a man in the military, unless we're married it means absolutely nothing.  If he was hurt right now, all news would go through his parents and I'd have absolutely no rights to see him.

If you don't want to do the whole circus of a wedding, just have a short ceremony or JOP and go out to lunch and be done with it.  It's a lot easier to plan, significantly less expensive, and will do the job.

For us, we already jointly own just about everything, we're on each other's bank accounts, share a cell phone family plan, car insurance, all utilities.  The only bill I get that doesn't include him is my credit card, and the same for him.  And we plan to keep it the same way after we get married, so really nothing there will change for us.  We already made joint decisions on purchases and expenses.  We're even registered as domestic partners so that he can be covered under my health insurance, since he's a student.  For us, the main reason we'd want to get married is for the family we hope to create - we would want our children to have the legal and social protection of parents who are married.

ETA:  Apparently a lot happened while I was writing this...

**Mutley**

Hetshup, I would rather have a better meal or more ALCOHOL than favors.  Judge away. 

oceana919

I'd rather give money to the American Cancer Society than spend money on trinkets no one wants or candy that most people won't even eat. Judge away.

hetshup

I'm also ending my wedding at 9 so that people can head downtown with their friends. 5 hours of reception is plenty IMO.

jeanacorina

My mom and I were just talking about this yesterday.

For DH and I, there is NO DIFFERECE in our daily lives before and after wedding (except no more wedding planning, yay!). We already functioned like a married couple, like Mutley said. We had joint bank accounts, shared a lease, adopted two cats together, and many of our friends treated us the same way they would if we were married. We lived together for over 3 years before the wedding.

I commented to my mom yesterday about how the thing that HAS changed (aside from legal stuff already mentioned and my name change), is how our families treat us and seem to view us. As the wedding approached, we became more and more a permanent fixture for our in-laws. Does that make sense? Before, I was just a girlfriend, and he was just a boyfriend. Now, as far as our families are concerned, we're both part of the other's family unit. The way our aunts, uncles, grandparents and even parents see us has "matured" for lack of a better word.

Mom said it's because we made a commitment to each other in front of God and family. I said "No, we signed papers to make it legal. We already had that commitment to each other in front of God."

So, there's that.

Anyway, as far as what other people think, you need to decide how much it matters to you. If there's one thing I can suggest- it's DO NOT put yourself through planning an all-out wedding if it's not something you WANT. I would have been just as happy eloping, but my parents were so excited to pay for a wedding, I decided to just go ahead with it.

My wedding was beautiful, and I have wonderful memories, and it cost about $11,000 overall. BUT, I was pretty miserable at many points in my planning process (ask many of these ladies, they'll attest), and I still say I would have been just as happy eloping. Anything would have been fine as long as it meant marrying Josh.

hetshup

Mutley-- I judge you for wanting alcohol right now. Don't you know you are incubatin'?


But seriously, after Mr. Man comes, you deserve a night out. Pump and dump!

VLS05

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_whats-difference?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:0b057cf1-15bd-421b-be4e-4727d8791cd4Post:1f8496b7-2c14-474a-b789-82c173dc2039">Re: What's the difference?</a>:
[QUOTE]I am curious as to why you have picked out a ring... In Response to Re: HELP! : Or why you are desperately looking for a venue... In Response to Contemporary Venues? : Or why you refer to him as your FI elsewhere... In Response to Registry question : Aren't you just a precious, pot-stirring dimwit.
Posted by **Mutley**[/QUOTE]

Perhaps I was asking for other people.  But since people are snarky like you, I worded as myself to not get crappy responses, rather nice responses.  I have friends that are engaged and have posed such questions to me, and I decided to ask on here.  Sorry if you think that's wrong but I was initially trying to not have a comment like that.  Let's see here...
I did mention that my BF and I went looking for rings and the Hearts on Fire is the one I told him I liked best. 
The registry thing was for my best friend in Buffalo who I am the MOH for her.  She asked me what I would ask for in a registery so I posted on here to get some feedback. 
The venue thing was for my little cousin who will be happily tying the knot next July.
Are you happy yet?  Sorry next time I will be the idiot girl that posts and asks for advice for other people. <img src="http://cdn.cl9.vanillaforums.com/downloaded/ver1.0/content/scripts/tinymce/plugins/emotions/images/smiley-smile.gif" border="0" alt="Smile" title="Smile" />

**Mutley**

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_whats-difference?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:0b057cf1-15bd-421b-be4e-4727d8791cd4Post:d2beaa63-6edf-4c5c-a001-3a0c02b41ae5">Re: What's the difference?</a>:
[QUOTE]Mutley-- I judge you for wanting alcohol right now. Don't you know you are incubatin'? But seriously, after Mr. Man comes, you deserve a night out. Pump and dump!
Posted by hetshup[/QUOTE]

Oh, it is already planned!  We have a date night set to try out a local wine bar for 2-3 weeks post-partum.  I want SALAMI, BRIE AND LOTS OF RED WINE!!! 

And yes, that needed CAPS and some extra !!.

P.S. My OB said that I could have a glass of wine here and there.  I had some champagne when I gave my MOH toast in April.  <img src="http://cdn.cl9.vanillaforums.com/downloaded/ver1.0/content/scripts/tinymce/plugins/emotions/images/smiley-innocent.gif" border="0" alt="Innocent" title="Innocent" />

VLS05

Oh and yes I am a dim-wit and I do need to get a clue.  Thanks....this is exactly why I posted.  The past half hour just flew by. 

hetshup

I have the best image of you with a loaf of bread, entire salami, magnum of wine and Brie all over your face. Oh and in my mental image, your boobs are huge.


OP-- It's been a long week, lets try something fun please?

**Mutley**

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_whats-difference?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:0b057cf1-15bd-421b-be4e-4727d8791cd4Post:0ae64dbd-0f42-4c89-b8e3-9f65218540ff">Re: What's the difference?</a>:
[QUOTE]I have the best image of you with a loaf of bread, entire salami, magnum of wine and Brie all over your face. Oh and in my mental image, your boobs are huge.
Posted by hetshup[/QUOTE]

This is probably an acurate image, particularly the boobs. 

DH knew the way to my heart early.  Our first date was at a wine bar with a meat and cheese board.  <a href="#" title="Click to view a larger photo" onclick="return gSiteLife.LoadForumPage('ForumImage', 'plckPhotoId', '892f2446-2d24-4945-a1e4-0b0a934138bd', 'plckRedirectUrl', gSiteLife.EscapeValue(window.location.href));"> <img src="http://cdn.cl9.vanillaforums.com/downloaded/ver1.0/content/images/store/9/1/892f2446-2d24-4945-a1e4-0b0a934138bd.medium.gif" alt="" /></a>
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jeanacorina

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_whats-difference?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:0b057cf1-15bd-421b-be4e-4727d8791cd4Post:12cbd56f-f464-4d41-b110-3258ba09e8fb">Re: What's the difference?</a>:
[QUOTE]Oh and yes I am a dim-wit and I do need to get a clue.  Thanks....this is exactly why I posted.  The past half hour just flew by. 
Posted by VLS05[/QUOTE]

So, you posted in the hopes that people would be snarky and you could laugh at them?

What about me? I feel like I wasted my time. <img src="http://cdn.cl9.vanillaforums.com/downloaded/ver1.0/content/scripts/tinymce/plugins/emotions/images/smiley-undecided.gif" border="0" alt="Undecided" title="Undecided" />

Narwhal

I liked your post Jeana, if that means anything.  I'd give you a , but it doesn't turn into the pretty pink heart on here.

Hell, we don't even need a JOP.  My momma's notarized, bitches!

VLS05

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_whats-difference?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:0b057cf1-15bd-421b-be4e-4727d8791cd4Post:c56b1540-5875-4926-b1bd-d5e96b99c26b">Re: What's the difference?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: What's the difference? : So, you posted in the hopes that people would be snarky and you could laugh at them? What about me? I feel like I wasted my time.
Posted by jeanacorina[/QUOTE]

No no, I just knew that people wouldn't take me seriously and would post snarky things.  And they are always a good laugh when I get to read them.  But I was seriously curious what people thought the main difference was.  Because I don't see many people talk about this type of thing.  Like I said, I've seen these boards and the people on here are crazy in planning these weddings.  I am the MOH in my best friends wedding coming up here in Sept (which is why I opened an account in the first place) and everything she has tried to do has been a complete fail due to different issues.  So it just makes me not want to do the whole wedding thing more and more.  I just like the random snarky comments that come into play as well.
I am not a snarky person at all so it makes me chuckle.

jeanacorina

If you don't want a wedding, talk to your dude-person about it and see if he's really got his heart set on it. If not, then don't have a big wedding. Have a casual, backyard reception after a simple ceremony, or just go to the JOP and tell any uppity family members to suck it.

In a nicer way, of course.

I'm telling you, planning a big wedding you don't even want is HELL.

Narwhal

While I'm still into the whole marriage institution, my experience with my sister's wedding was really a big part in me not wanting a big traditional wedding when the time comes.

They invited everyone from my BIL's family and church (we don't have a big family or a lot of family-friends, so there was hardly anyone from our side) and half the people they didn't even know.  She wanted something small and fun but let people talk her into other things because it was easier and cheaper and traditional.  Now they both say they can't even remember much about their wedding. I think that's a shame, they've been married less than 7 years.

She didn't even get to pick out the color scheme she wanted.

oceana919

So, essentially, you are deliberately stirring the pot?

ps. If all those posts are about other people, why are they all worded as "me", "I", "my FI", etc.? And why can't these brides post for themselves?

**Mutley**

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_whats-difference?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:0b057cf1-15bd-421b-be4e-4727d8791cd4Post:920c41ff-7de7-463e-ba5c-674fcc9a764a">Re: What's the difference?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: What's the difference? : Perhaps I was asking for other people.  But since people are snarky like you, I worded as myself to not get crappy responses, rather nice responses.  I have friends that are engaged and have posed such questions to me, and I decided to ask on here.  Sorry if you think that's wrong but I was initially trying to not have a comment like that.  Let's see here...

I did mention that my BF and I went looking for rings and the Hearts on Fire is the one I told him I liked best.
<strong>So this translates into lying on a wedding board about it being 'your ring?' </strong><a href="#" title="Click to view a larger photo" onclick="return gSiteLife.LoadForumPage('ForumImage', 'plckPhotoId', '4e6152bd-9fff-4917-b1fa-35a29029fde9', 'plckRedirectUrl', gSiteLife.EscapeValue(window.location.href));"> <img src="http://cdn.cl9.vanillaforums.com/downloaded/ver1.0/content/images/store/14/1/4e6152bd-9fff-4917-b1fa-35a29029fde9.medium.gif" alt="" /></a><strong> </strong>

The registry thing was for my best friend in Buffalo who I am the MOH for her.  She asked me what I would ask for in a registery so I posted on here to get some feedback. 
<strong>So then why did you feel the need to DD that post now? </strong>

The venue thing was for my little cousin who will be happily tying the knot next July.
<a href="http://cdn.cl9.vanillaforums.com/downloaded/ver1.0/content/images/store/14/8/7e1bb585-9396-4418-b830-044b1abff71e.large.gif" title="Click to view a larger photo" onclick="return gSiteLife.LoadForumPage('ForumImage', 'plckPhotoId', '7e1bb585-9396-4418-b830-044b1abff71e', 'plckRedirectUrl', gSiteLife.EscapeValue(window.location.href));" class="PhotoLink"> <img src="http://cdn.cl9.vanillaforums.com/downloaded/ver1.0/content/images/store/14/8/7e1bb585-9396-4418-b830-044b1abff71e.medium.gif" alt="" /></a>

Are you happy yet? 
<strong>Happy? I was never unhappy, but thanks. </strong>

Sorry next time I will be the idiot girl that posts and asks for advice for other people.
Posted by VLS05[/QUOTE]

And why did you feel the need to continue your charade about finding a venue?

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_pennsylvania-central_contemporary-venues?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:107Discussion:8f36c3f2-a1cc-4f9b-b6c3-013cdcefabe0Post:89d1b07a-86ab-444a-a6a5-befd19c63881">Re: Contemporary Venues?</a>:
[QUOTE]My FI and I actually live right up the street from the Royal Manchester Golf Links, but there are no pictures online.  He just said to me on Friday that they added a "Pub" and we went and looked at the outside, which is gorgeous.  Any idea on where to get pictures of the inside?
Posted by VLS05[/QUOTE]

I still find your whole explanation to be off, but  <a href="#" title="Click to view a larger photo" onclick="return gSiteLife.LoadForumPage('ForumImage', 'plckPhotoId', 'a3534f43-b460-4e6f-876b-9541e891e0ae', 'plckRedirectUrl', gSiteLife.EscapeValue(window.location.href));"> <img src="http://cdn.cl9.vanillaforums.com/downloaded/ver1.0/content/images/store/3/7/a3534f43-b460-4e6f-876b-9541e891e0ae.medium.gif" alt="" /></a>.


<a href="#" title="Click to view a larger photo" onclick="return gSiteLife.LoadForumPage('ForumImage', 'plckPhotoId', 'a3534f43-b460-4e6f-876b-9541e891e0ae', 'plckRedirectUrl', gSiteLife.EscapeValue(window.location.href));"> </a>In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_whats-difference?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:0b057cf1-15bd-421b-be4e-4727d8791cd4Post:72051011-a84a-4063-98e0-8e3cd5694659">Re: What's the difference?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: What's the difference? : No no, I just knew that people wouldn't take me seriously and would post snarky things. 
<strong>Who wouldn't take you seriously?  On here?  On your local?  </strong>

And they are always a good laugh when I get to read them. 
<strong>So you were trying to stir the pot?  Shocking. </strong>

But I was seriously curious what people thought the main difference was.  Because I don't see many people talk about this type of thing.  Like I said, I've seen these boards and the people on here are crazy in planning these weddings.  I am the MOH in my best friends wedding coming up here in Sept (which is why I opened an account in the first place) and everything she has tried to do has been a complete fail due to different issues.  So it just makes me not want to do the whole wedding thing more and more. 
<strong>So then, you don't need to do that.  Another shock.</strong>

I just like the random snarky comments that come into play as well. I am not a snarky person at all so it makes me chuckle.
<strong>You make me chuckle as well.  </strong>
Posted by VLS05[/QUOTE]

dwest2201

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_whats-difference?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:0b057cf1-15bd-421b-be4e-4727d8791cd4Post:5446b5aa-0ca6-4087-8f47-999f889f99f0">Re: What's the difference?</a>:
[QUOTE]If you don't want a wedding, talk to your dude-person about it and see if he's really got his heart set on it. If not, then don't have a big wedding. Have a casual, backyard reception after a simple ceremony, or just go to the JOP and tell any uppity family members to suck it. In a nicer way, of course. I'm telling you, planning a big wedding you don't even want is HELL.
Posted by jeanacorina[/QUOTE]


I REALLY, REALLY love that a mod on TK just said that! 

It's true though, doing anything that you don't want to sucks.  Wedding planning is time consuming and can be frustrating and exhausting as well especially if you aren't into it!

jeanacorina

I agree with whatever Jeana said.

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