Choices

kate85

So FI and I have been discussing prelim. wedding plans and He wants a Beach Wedding in Florida (Where we live so it would be a DW for all of our guests). We would then have an "at home reception" (back in our hometown) for all of our friends and family that can't make the trip.

I would like a church Wedding back near our hometown where very few guests would have to travel and have the wedding and reception the same day.

Cost wise I believe it will be about the same except the DW might be a little less since the at home reception will probably be less formal then an after wedding reception, but it will cost our guests to travel.

What would you do?

Ana_2985

I'm in almost the exact same situation (except there's 3 locations instead of 2).  We're going to base our decision on how many people can attend.  It's really important to us that all of our family be there, so we'll choose whatever is easiest for the largest amount of people. 

So if I were you, my choice would be the wedding in your hometown.  You could always go to a beachy place for your honeymoon, right?

jeanacorina

Given the choice (and if money were no option), I'd do the beach.

But money is an option for me, and I found during my research that the beach wedding wouldn't be less expensive, and planning from far away without being able to meet with vendors would be really rough.

Those are things to think about.

Goldlie11

I think it depends on how much of a burden it would be on your family.  I wanted a destination wedding too.  However, FI felt that most of his family would not be able to attend due to money issues.  So. we're having something local, but still small.  I've never wanted a big wedding, so at least we are still limiting the list.  

**Mutley**

We had that discussion before we got engaged as well. 

I wanted a semi-elopement (invite everyone to whatever island we chose.)  FI wanted a church wedding with family and friends.  It wasn't that I didn't want to get married in the church, I was just very scared of the price.  (I was also scared of becoming a bridezilla due to my overplanning nature.) 

At the end of the day, I am so very thankful that we had a church wedding with all of our friends and family there.  I loved standing up at the altar and looking out on all of the people who support us.  It was a very moving experience for me.

For us, while the marriage is about 'us,' the wedding was about celebrating with those who are dear to us. 


Please do NOT get married at the beach and THEN go home to get married again in the church.  Do one or the other.  If you are going by cost, it will probably be more costly to do the beach wedding AND an at-home reception.   

 

kate85

We defiantly won't be doing both!

I think FI wants the Beach wedding because he knows that not many people will be able to come and he does not want a lot of people staring at him. I really want our closest friends and family to be there.

The beach wedding will be easier from a planning standpoint because we live in Tampa. It would just be a DW for all of our guests. We would not have the ability to meet with vendors in our hometown. Except for maybe a weekend trip.

Either it will cost more money or it will be harder to plan. So I guess we will just have to decide which is more important.

rickylee244

FI and I had a similar problem.  We live in South Florida while most of our friends and family are in the northeast, split between NY and RI.  So what we are doing is spliting the difference.  We found a venue that was pretty equidistance between our familys.  That way everyone still had to travel (about 2 hours) and we blocked rooms at a hotel so those that want to stay overnight can stay, but it is still within what I consider to be driving distance if they want to go home afterward instead. 

I want to enjoy celebrating by wedding with ALL my friends and not just those that could afford a DW down to florida.

Depending on how far away home is for you. I can vouch that its more difficult to do all the planning involved, but for me, it will all be worth it in teh end.