POLL: How long did you wait....

JMM4208

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_poll-long-did-wait?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:58b21805-b498-4b84-aa5d-434b0822c1c8Post:1de26ddf-e860-495f-9a29-a58c21fa6f76">Re: POLL: How long did you wait....</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: POLL: How long did you wait.... : I hear that a lot, and my response is this:  if you were with someone who you loved enough to marry - they were hands down the best person IN THE WORLD you could have ever asked for in a BF/FI/H - then you have sex, and it's not that spectacular, are you going to dump them like a stale loaf of bread?  Is whether or not he can make you O a bigger determining factor than whether or not he treats you nicely, genuinely loves you, finds you attractive, has compatible beliefs/likes/wants, etc.?  Just the other side of the story.  ;-)
Posted by sessionswedding[/QUOTE]

I definitely see your point. I'm not saying sex is everything, but if your in a great relationship and everything else is the way it should be, the sex will be great too. The emotional connection that happens is a reflection, to me, of the relationship. My first BF I was intimate with waited a year and a half into our relationship to do so, and we were engaged at the time. I thought the guy was perfect. The sex to tell the truth, was terrible, we didn't click at all, the relationship continued for another year and a half and he did nothing but bring me down and cheat on me. My current BF and I have clicked from the beginning in the bedroom and outside of it, and I honestly cant see myself with anyone else. I guess Im trying to say sex is a reflection of the connection in your relationship on deeper levels, but is in no way everything you need to survive.

BUT I totally respect the people that can hold out. I am just built differently. <img src="http://cdn.cl9.vanillaforums.com/downloaded/ver1.0/content/scripts/tinymce/plugins/emotions/images/smiley-smile.gif" border="0" alt="Smile" title="Smile" />

marleylikeair

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_poll-long-did-wait?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:58b21805-b498-4b84-aa5d-434b0822c1c8Post:a37cc984-9fe3-4f71-ad9b-bb7b3e30ffda">Re: POLL: How long did you wait....</a>:
[QUOTE]I'm am so loving this thread. Anyway, I voted "other" because technically BF and I were sleeping together before we were a couple. I'd like to add, though, that both of us had each been with only one person prior, and had been in relationships with those people for a quite a while.  We aren't sluts; we just had a lot of physical chemistry in the early stages of our relationship. <strong> I'm actually glad that we just gave into it, so I was able to expend my mental energy building an emotional connection with him, rather than focusing on keeping my pants on.</strong>
Posted by Elle1036[/QUOTE]

This...

[QUOTE]In Response to Re: POLL: How long did you wait.... : Well, you know, it looks like the majority of people waited more than a month, so actually, I think there is some support for my theory. :) <strong>But I also think that longer term relationship success has to do with being emotionally mature and having a strong, positive sense of self worth. Sleeping with a guy early may be a symptom of underlying issues that are the REAL reason some women don't have the serious relationships they want.</strong>
Posted by desertsun[/QUOTE]


...and this.

ETA: Also, this:

[QUOTE]I definitely agree that low self-esteem could lead someone to sleep with other people too quickly. But I don't think people who don't wait long necessarily have low self-esteem. I also don't think that having sex early in the relationship prevents it from being a long term successful relationship. It probably just seems that way because the percentage of people waiting to have sex that also want a serious relationship is likely higher than the percentage of people who would have sex right away and also want a serious relationship. Not sure if that makes any sense.
Posted by Ana_2985[/QUOTE]

'Kay. I'm done now. Promise. <img src="http://cdn.cl9.vanillaforums.com/downloaded/ver1.0/content/scripts/tinymce/plugins/emotions/images/smiley-innocent.gif" border="0" alt="Innocent" title="Innocent" />

desertsun

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_poll-long-did-wait?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:58b21805-b498-4b84-aa5d-434b0822c1c8Post:07832a19-af76-4aa4-8978-4f1ee30f4ba9">Re: POLL: How long did you wait....</a>:
[QUOTE]<strong>I definitely agree that low self-esteem could lead someone to sleep with other people too quickly. But I don't think people who don't wait long necessarily have low self-esteem.</strong> I also don't think that having sex early in the relationship prevents it from being a long term successful relationship. It probably just seems that way because the percentage of people waiting to have sex that also want a serious relationship is likely higher than the percentage of people who would have sex right away and also want a serious relationship. Not sure if that makes any sense.
Posted by Ana_2985[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>I totally agree and should have made this more explicit in what I said earlier. Thank you for clarifying! I think you're saying what I'm thinking better than I did, so you're making sense to me. :)</div><div>
</div>

HaneyMobile

We waited 12 days before we had sex, but we'd been best friends for 2.5 years at that point. Now we've been together for 3 years, and I know that we'll always be together.

Also, my mom and dad met, dated, and got married within three months and they just had their 30th anniversary.