Keep Engagement Secret - For Awhile?

paintgirl

Since some of the girls here had to play 20 questions repeatedly with friends and family after getting engaged, I'm wondering: Did anyone / will anyone keep their engagement to themselves for a few days or for a week or so? Just to enjoy the peace and quiet for awhile?

I know that might be impossible for people who live near their families.

Narwhal

We did it for a few hours, until FI couldn't take it anymore. I'm glad we didn't call right away, it was fun to just enjoy it for ourselves before getting everyone else involved.

KD+BC

We kept ours a secret overnight but I didn't sleep. MH proposed on Christmas Eve at about midnight and we didn't tell anyone until we got to my parents' house at 9 the next morning. I didn't sleep at all that night though because I was so excited to tell everyone!

That being said, I didn't really mind the thousands of questions. I basically laughed at anyone who stupidly asked what we had planned less that 24 hours after he proposed!

nottheonlydreamer44

KD your story made me smile. I can just picture you sitting up all night, giddy and glowing, waiting to tell your family on Christmas Day! Too cute.

GreenPepperBurger

I will probably burst at the seams when it happens, so I don't think I will be keeping it a secret.

skyler1108

Everyone knew that it was coming besides me and they also knew when it was going to happen. We did not call anyone right away. We called people about an hour or so later.

Both my family and his family would have been very upset if we kept something like that from them for a day let alone a week.

bourgehm

I kept it secret for a full 20 minutes, then we told our families. haha

MissOwl

i couldn't imagine keeping it a secret. i will want to shout it from the rooftops. however mr.owl and i do live together so we can probably find a way to hole up and just enjoy being engaged.

jemmini6

I waited all of 10 minutes, at most.  FI proposed to me on the beach in Hawaii at sunset, so we sat and kissed and hugged for a little bit, then I called my mom because of the time difference...I wanted to tell her before she went to bed.

Edit:  because we were on vacation, we still got our glowy time to just enjoy it.  Even if we weren't, I don't think I could've waited very long to tell people though.  I was excited

bsidebella

My engagement was never a secret. FI can't keep his mouth shut for the life of him, so about a dozen people already knew prior to him even popping the question.

SeaTea02

If the only reason you want to keep it a secret is to avoid some questions I think it is silly. They are just questions. Be an adult and deal with it. I don't think "OMG WHEN IS THE WEDDING???" Is enough of a reason to hide something like this from friends or family. 

motoLyn

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_keep-engagement-secret-awhile?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:791ccafc-0a9a-4058-b425-3ee187688fb2Post:fb60895e-751f-4333-9028-595e20dc507f">Re: Keep Engagement Secret - For Awhile?</a>:
[QUOTE]If the only reason you want to keep it a secret is to avoid some questions I think it is silly. They are just questions. Be an adult and deal with it. I don't think "OMG WHEN IS THE WEDDING???" Is enough of a reason to hide something like this from friends or family. 
Posted by SeaTea02[/QUOTE]

I think it is more delaying telling everyone for a bit.  Like quiet time to bask in the joy and glow before being bombarded by well wishers and the questions that follow. 

marleylikeair

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_keep-engagement-secret-awhile?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:791ccafc-0a9a-4058-b425-3ee187688fb2Post:162c4643-97d1-485e-951e-f227a0cabc52">Re: Keep Engagement Secret - For Awhile?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Keep Engagement Secret - For Awhile? : I think it is more delaying telling everyone for a bit.  Like quiet time to bask in the joy and glow before being bombarded by well wishers and the questions that follow. 
Posted by motoLyn[/QUOTE]


Agreed, Lyn!

My answer is that I'd like some basky, glowy time, but that's all I know. I think it'll depend how I feel in the moment. I can't see waiting more than a day or two, though. I'll be so excited. :)

AbigailMS

I assume both sets of parents will know before I will, its heavy tradition here to ask the bride's parents, and SO and his parents are SUPER close, so I'm assuming they'll know as soon as he purchases the e-ring. I think I'll wait to announce it to the world until I can tell my closest friends and family in person, after that, I'm gonna shout it to the world, and then giggle and smile to my hearts content.

loopy82

I was in Mexico when Paul proposed. We were there with four other people and they all knew he was going to propose (and I had a very strong inclination as well) so we first emailed our parents then went and met back up with our friends. The next day I posted it on facebook. We were then home a week later. Since we weren't reachable by phone or in person I didn't have to then deal with any of those questions right away. When we got home the wedding planning immediately started, but that is because I am horribly impatient.

AudgiePodge

We waitted until the following day. I called my dad, grandma and sister. Word spread from there.

MLekathLEEN

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_keep-engagement-secret-awhile?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:791ccafc-0a9a-4058-b425-3ee187688fb2Post:d5a55593-12b4-4000-88da-43073d2f4bd8">Re: Keep Engagement Secret - For Awhile?</a>:
[QUOTE]My engagement was never a secret. FI can't keep his mouth shut for the life of him, so about a dozen people already knew prior to him even popping the question.
Posted by bsidebella[/QUOTE]

Ditto, everyone knew before I did.

PaigeMcC

We waited about an hour.  BUT we had also gone away (about 3 hrs from home) to a resort for our 4 yr anniversary...so no one could find us.  muahahahahah!  We just sat there giggling and kissing and making ridicilous lovey-faces at each other.  It was sickening, really.  LOL

But then I called my mommy and he called his parents.  From there it was texts to the girls and then we ran away to go swimming.  You should have seen the messages on my phone when I got back..HOLY.

bsidebella

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_keep-engagement-secret-awhile?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:791ccafc-0a9a-4058-b425-3ee187688fb2Post:efa9e30a-57ab-4095-9015-9bfb9415bf15">Re: Keep Engagement Secret - For Awhile?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Keep Engagement Secret - For Awhile? : Ditto, everyone knew before I did.
Posted by MLekathLEEN[/QUOTE]

Good thing we said yes, huh?

motoLyn

Our close friends knew it before me because they had to be there hiding in the bushes to record the event, and as for our family they knew it was on the horizon.  FMIL was like "finally"...  LoL!

I got to enjoy it for a couple of hours and then made calls to the immediate family, texts to others and then a posting on FB later on at night. 

jacquiroxx

We finished our day in the city, walking around Central Park, went shopping, and had dinner. We told his parents when we got home and then went to my mum's and told her the next morning, then to my dad's and then made phone calls. I'm glad we finished our date to just have some time to enjoy our engagement together.

Elle1036

I'll probably wait a couple days to tell most people.

However, if I am anywhere near a computer (or my phone) soon after it happens, you girls will know instantly.

CFar13

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_keep-engagement-secret-awhile?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:791ccafc-0a9a-4058-b425-3ee187688fb2Post:7d728452-a245-4b44-97a9-36f42a6bfee0">Re: Keep Engagement Secret - For Awhile?</a>:
[QUOTE]I kept it secret for a full 20 minutes, then we told our families. haha
Posted by bourgehm[/QUOTE]

This sounds like me. I didn't tell anyone for about 20 minutes then I just had to. But I did wait until the next morning to tell my parents.

paintgirl

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_keep-engagement-secret-awhile?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:791ccafc-0a9a-4058-b425-3ee187688fb2Post:fb60895e-751f-4333-9028-595e20dc507f">Re: Keep Engagement Secret - For Awhile?</a>:
[QUOTE]If the only reason you want to keep it a secret is to avoid some questions I think it is silly. They are just questions. Be an adult and deal with it. I don't think "OMG WHEN IS THE WEDDING???" Is enough of a reason to hide something like this from friends or family. 
Posted by SeaTea02[/QUOTE]

Yeah not really my point. I was actually thinking "Why the F do people feel the need to call mommy and put a banner up on Facebook the SECOND they get engaged, then get upset because someone asks them about the wedding? Why not enjoy a day or two with their new FI before renting the sky writer?"

That's kind of what I was thinking.

LADY324

My FI proposed to me on the beach.  Once we left the beach I called my mom and MOH.  I just texted my closest girlfriends.  FI updated his facebook saying she said yes   Then we shut off our phones and enjoyed a romantic dinner   We were away for the weekend so it was nice to have the whole weekend to spend together.  My parents and his parents knew it was happening that weekend he had told them before we left.

He also took my mom and cousin with him ring shopping! 

zipis1

In my head we're going to keep it to ourselves until we can tell people in person, which means it could be a "secret" for maybe a month.

Whether it'll really work out or not who knows. I just really, really hate phones.

loves2shop4shoes

We kept it to ourselves (except for the crowd that witnessed the proposal) for 2 hours or so.  Then we started the rounds of phone calls.

LizzyTish88

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_keep-engagement-secret-awhile?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:791ccafc-0a9a-4058-b425-3ee187688fb2Post:4b9c211f-0f0b-4e2b-a540-0992ab3abe61">Re: Keep Engagement Secret - For Awhile?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Keep Engagement Secret - For Awhile? : Yeah not really my point. I was actually thinking "Why the F do people feel the need to call mommy and put a banner up on Facebook the SECOND they get engaged, then get upset because someone asks them about the wedding? <strong>Why not enjoy a day or two with their new FI before renting the sky writer?</strong>" That's kind of what I was thinking.
Posted by paintgirl[/QUOTE]

So does this mean that I should return mine? Damn, I was having so much fun with it already.

TheMutleys

Yep.  We kept it a secret for 2 weeks.  This even included a visit to his family for 1 week.  During this trip, we picked out our venue.  Once DH talked to my dad, we still waited another day to tell people because my cousin's engagement party was that day.  Then, it was another 2-3 weeks before DH proposed a 3rd time but this time, with a ring. 

We loved having our own little secret, and it provided many laughs.  It did allow us to just enjoy being engaged.  The only person who was pissed was my MOH.  I was very involved in her proposal and she thought that she would be involved in mine but our DH's are exceedingly different.   

leia1979

We were on vacation at the time, and I really wanted to tell my parents in person, so we waited two days. I felt bad talking to them on the phone the day before and not saying anything. I felt like I was lying to them.

FI waited to tell his parents until after we told mine, because we didn't trust his mom not to announce it all over Facebook.

katanne9

I think there is a lot to be said for keeping it between the 2 of you for a time. It's a special time : )

That being said, we were too excited and called people that night.




However, I was really glad we at least took the afternoon and evening to enjoy it together. A lot of people I know started called people and Facebooked it immediately.