So, I can post here?

wedding91011bride

Oh wow. This board makes me happy. When I joined, I told the computer that I was engaged, but I'm really not. I was just too embarrassed to admit that I was on this site with out a ring. So, I'm not that weird after all?

forthepocket

lol not weird no. Not unless you're planning a surpise wedding. I told the site I was engaged but I didn't read that there were other options to put down like maid of honor or bridesmaid.   Do you think you might get engaged soon? Tell us about yourself.

[Deleted User]

Well, hello!  I can't speak on whether or not you're weird LOL... but as far as being weird for not having a ring and being here... That, in itself, does not make you weird... but if you're planning-obsessed you might not be as welcome...

Many of us are not engaged but are in committed relationships that we know will eventually lead to being engaged and then married... but we are all content with the status of our relationships as they are... sometimes we get impatient but for the most part, we are here to speak with other ladies just like us...

Tell as a little about yourself?

bethsmiles

Well that depends...

Have you ever used the phrase "Future FI"?

Are you currently planning your wedding (more than just day dreaming)?

Have you ever considered yourself "unofficially engaged"?

If you answer no to all of those questions feel free to stay and post. Also please read the sticky threads at the top of the board.

[Deleted User]

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_september-2011-weddings_knottie-wedding-day-list?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:649Discussion:a1942c43-525f-486c-810e-8a385dcd5daePost:d07569b9-18a9-42a2-8827-0758533d3504">Re: Knottie Wedding Day List</a>:
[QUOTE]9.10.11 Yipppeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Posted by wedding91011bride[/QUOTE]

I'm a little nervous... THIS makes you weird! <img src="http://cdn.cl9.vanillaforums.com/downloaded/ver1.0/content/scripts/tinymce/plugins/emotions/images/smiley-undecided.gif" border="0" alt="Undecided" title="Undecided" />

Elle1036

Yeah, being on this board doesn't make you weird, but the fact that you're posting on a wedding month board and a have a date as part of your username makes me hesitate.  Are you getting married next year or not?

wedding91011bride

Well, we've talked about it and know that's the date we want, but it's just not official yet. His parents are being horrible and telling him to slow down. But we know we are ready. When you know, you just know, right?

Elle1036

I actually don't buy the whole "when you know, you know" argument that people love to use.  It fails to explain the near 50% divorce rate in the US.

I don't generally care about age, but since you mentioned his parents, how old are you, hun?

AudgiePodge

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_can-post-here?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:a391c2ea-d61d-4a50-8ed3-478c74a4ad28Post:f264a16e-da14-4d59-a9af-55ead856b092">Re: So, I can post here?</a>:
[QUOTE]Well, we've talked about it and know that's the date we want, but it's just not official yet. His parents are being horrible and telling him to slow down. But we know we are ready. When you know, you just know, right?
Posted by wedding91011bride[/QUOTE]



ZOMG you <em>are </em>crazy.

wedding91011bride

That's a good point. We both tend to be a little impulsive, so his parents making him slow down might be a good thing. But I just really want to start planning. I think they'll let him do it in 6 months. Can I start planning now?

I'm 23

AudgiePodge

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_can-post-here?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:a391c2ea-d61d-4a50-8ed3-478c74a4ad28Post:bd2670ff-79d4-47cb-8efb-04fc6bf83097">Re: So, I can post here?</a>:
[QUOTE]That's a good point. We both tend to be a little impulsive, so his parents making him slow down might be a good thing. But I just really want to start planning. I think they'll let him do it in 6 months. <strong>Can I start planning now</strong>? I'm 23
Posted by wedding91011bride[/QUOTE]


NO, not until you're engaged.
Is your boyfriend underage and unable to make decisions himself?

SeaTea02

I can't hate on her for writing on her month board because FLAMEFUL CONFESSION: I do too. I mainly just encourage the girls that are there and I don't talk about myself. If my wedding month changes, I would just change boards.

However, you should not be planning your wedding already if you are not enaged. I see your comment on your month board was just the day, but if you don't have a venue booked (which you shouldn't because you aren't engaged) if isn't set in stone.

Typically when parents think you are moving too fast they have a good reason. How old are you both? How long have you been dating?

EDIT: the stuff with her age was posted while I was typing. Disregard.

I am rather currious about "letting him" ? What is that?

Elle1036

I agree with Podge (I've decided that I like that part of your username better than the Audgie part).

91011 -  While still pretty young, at 23 you and your boyfriend should be capable of making your own decisions.  Why are his parents stopping you from being engaged?  Who's going to pay for the wedding?

wedding91011bride

Okay. Darn. Well, at least I can look at the pictures and get ideas going. I've sort of asked my BFF to be a bridesmaid, but I don't think that's too bad.

He's 23 too, but he never does anything to piss his parents off. It's been kind of a thing with us while we've been together. My parents aren't really that type, so it's foreign to me. I think it's our lives to live. They don't. But he does live with them, so he kind of has to live by their rules right now.

[Deleted User]

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_can-post-here?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:a391c2ea-d61d-4a50-8ed3-478c74a4ad28Post:bd2670ff-79d4-47cb-8efb-04fc6bf83097">Re: So, I can post here?</a>:
[QUOTE]That's a good point. We both tend to be a little impulsive, so his parents making him slow down might be a good thing. But I just really want to start planning.<strong> I think they'll let him do it in 6 months. Can I start planning now? I'm 23
</strong>Posted by wedding91011bride[/QUOTE]

(Oh, boy! I was wrong! You not just weird, you're crazy!)

NO! You can NOT start planning...

1. You are not engaged.
2. You're boyfriends parents are right for making you both slow down since you 'both tend to be a little impulsive'
3. If you can honestly word it that 'they'll LET him do it 6 months. You are absolutely NOT ready to be married!!

wedding91011bride

We will pay for it. Nothing fancy because we are young and don't make a lot of money.

We've been together for 6 months.

bethsmiles

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_can-post-here?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:a391c2ea-d61d-4a50-8ed3-478c74a4ad28Post:bd2670ff-79d4-47cb-8efb-04fc6bf83097">Re: So, I can post here?</a>:
[QUOTE]That's a good point. We both tend to be a little impulsive, so his parents making him slow down might be a good thing. But I just really want to start planning. I think they'll let him do it in 6 months. Can I start planning now? I'm 23
Posted by wedding91011bride[/QUOTE]

Seriously? His parents have a say in this? You are both adults, although considering your parents' opinions is often a good idea, saying that they will "let him do it" makes me wonder about his maturity.

And no you cannot start planning now because you are not engaged. Wedding planning is for engaged people.

bethsmiles

You are crazy. Please go away.

wedding91011bride

He's not the most mature person I know. But we are in love. I figure I can help him grow up.

wedding91011bride

Wow. What happened? Did I do something to offend you guys?

Elle1036

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_can-post-here?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:a391c2ea-d61d-4a50-8ed3-478c74a4ad28Post:a7d940dd-a3e1-4918-a0e1-81fe20d1a6e4">Re: So, I can post here?</a>:
[QUOTE]We will pay for it. Nothing fancy because we are young and don't make a lot of money. We've been together for 6 months.
Posted by wedding91011bride[/QUOTE]

6 months?  Why the rush to get married?  You've got the rest of your lives to be together.  Wait until you've been together a few years, he's not living with his parents, and you can afford the wedding you want.  It's a win-win-win.

SeaTea02

6 months? I have said this before and I will say it again. If you have condiments (like mustard) in  your refrigerator that are older than your relationship it is too soon.

AudgiePodge

I have no more advice to give, without making my head asplode.

Best of luck to you both.

bethsmiles

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_can-post-here?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:a391c2ea-d61d-4a50-8ed3-478c74a4ad28Post:f69ff7b2-6a27-47ba-ba77-d561a7881119">Re: So, I can post here?</a>:
[QUOTE]He's not the most mature person I know. But we are in love. I figure I can help him grow up.
Posted by wedding91011bride[/QUOTE]

NO! NO! NO! OH MY GOD NO! Come on, I'm only 20 and I know that you can't marry someone expecting to change them. You marry a person that you can accept 100% even if they never change. You shouldn't even be talking about marriage with this man.

wedding91011bride

That's a good point SeaTea. I've never really thought of it that way.

AudgiePodge

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_can-post-here?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:a391c2ea-d61d-4a50-8ed3-478c74a4ad28Post:d6b0181a-9d91-41b2-b963-59379253cbc0">Re: So, I can post here?</a>:
[QUOTE]Wow. What happened? Did I do something to offend you guys?
Posted by wedding91011bride[/QUOTE]

Lurk moar.

wedding91011bride

What does that mean? What's moar?

Elle1036

Moar is lolcat speak for "more".  Lurk means hang around on the boards, read the threads, etc, but don't post.  You'll get a feel for the board and the personalities of the girls here so that you know what you should and shouldn't say.

bethsmiles

I think she mean lurk more. As in look through old posts and get a feel for the board. Start with the one at the top that says Welcome to NEY.

[Deleted User]

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_can-post-here?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:a391c2ea-d61d-4a50-8ed3-478c74a4ad28Post:f69ff7b2-6a27-47ba-ba77-d561a7881119">Re: So, I can post here?</a>:
[QUOTE]He's not the most mature person I know. But we are in love. I figure I can help him grow up.
Posted by wedding91011bride[/QUOTE]

There is something wrong with EVERY part of this!!

1. "He's not the most mature person I know." - STOP right there... If he is 23 years old and NOT mature, he probably won't grow out of it any time soon! Clearly, you aren't mature either! Marriage is for MATURE individuals. End of Story!

2. "But we are in love" - Chances are you are in LUST not love... learn the difference!

3. "I figure I can help him grow up." - You can't! He has to grow up on his own. You both need to grow up. Get an education, get a career, learn more about each other and only then should you even THINK about getting married.

wedding91011bride

Okay. Got it. Still not sure what lolcat is, but I understand the concept.

So, if you guys don't think I should get married are you okay with me even lurking moar?