AW- Wedding dress shopping! (I think I may have found THE ONE) PIP

nottheonlydreamer44

LOL you can never, ever go to bed early Paige.

The first Ana suggestion is a no-go: tried it on in the store and there was a collective *um, no* it for some reason looks very strange on, probably because I'm short. I love her last selection and plan on trying that on tomorrow!

Right now its between #1, #5 and the 2nd one Ana picked. We shall see.

And girl you rock what you got! I don't judge anyone else based on size besides myself. I wish I could embrace and be as happy with my size as you are with yours.

PaigeMcC

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_aw-wedding-dress-shopping-think-may-found-one-pip?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:ad18fba2-1d74-4745-adc8-81b68691a4a4Post:9085cc41-68b7-42db-9e90-15f9e57c8bd9">Re: AW- Wedding dress shopping! (I think I may have found THE ONE) PIP</a>:
[QUOTE]LOL you can never, ever go to bed early Paige. The first Ana suggestion is a no-go: tried it on in the store and there was a collective *um, no* it for some reason looks very strange on, probably because I'm short. I love her last selection and plan on trying that on tomorrow! Right now its between #1, #5 and the 2nd one Ana picked. We shall see. And girl you rock what you got! I don't judge anyone else based on size besides myself. <strong>I wish I could embrace and be as happy with my size as you are with yours. :)</strong>
Posted by nottheonlydreamer44[/QUOTE]

<div>It's a long journey to embrace a plus sized body.  I realized a long time ago that people like me despite the fact that I might not always like my body- I'm friendly, funny, outgoing and generally a good person.  I think my one friend put it the best "I can't imagine you at half your size - we'd lose half of Paige!!"  It made me giggle because my size is part of my identity and although I struggled with it for years I'm okay with it now.  My personality is just as big as  I am...it sort of matches;)</div>

PaigeMcC

 

nottheonlydreamer44

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_aw-wedding-dress-shopping-think-may-found-one-pip?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:ad18fba2-1d74-4745-adc8-81b68691a4a4Post:e65250f6-53de-4925-afb1-ae0bb917585b">Re: AW- Wedding dress shopping! (I think I may have found THE ONE) PIP</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: AW- Wedding dress shopping! (I think I may have found THE ONE) PIP : It's a long journey to embrace a plus sized body.  I realized a long time ago that people like me despite the fact that I might not always like my body- I'm friendly, funny, outgoing and generally a good person.  I think my one friend put it the best "<strong>I can't imagine you at half your size - we'd lose half of Paige!!"  It made me giggle because my size is part of my identity and although I struggled with it for years I'm okay with it now.  My personality is just as big as  I am...it sort of matches;)
</strong>Posted by PaigeMcC[/QUOTE]


I think that is an awesome way of putting it and it sounds like your friend is definitely right! I think I was a happier more outgoing person when I was bigger. I didn't always like what I saw but I didn't obsess so much. Now that I'm "small" or whatever you want to call it, I feel like my personality has gone down too. I'm far more into weighing myself and constantly wondering if I went up or down a pound. I don't eat the best just because I don't feel like it and I don't work out. I just want to keep myself this size because In my head that's where I think I should be. I'm never thin enough and even know I'm not happy with being a size 4.

I don't want to gain weight but I'd love to have my personality back again. It might be the weight and it might be the medication and the fact that my "personality" was really just parts of my disorder. I don't know anymore - I just wish I could get excited and stay excited about something for more than 5 minutes. LOL.

PaigeMcC

I don't think my frame would even allow me to be a size 4...rofl!  The smallest I've EVER been, when I was a fully grown adult, was a size 14.  That was lovely.  I felt thin.  Buttt I was also about 8 years younger than I am now.  lol

dwest2201

OP, the dresses that Ana posted are probably best for an outdoor wedding... defintiely try on more dresses when you go back.

Also, I think that saying that you are a "PERFECTsize 4" is what rubbed people the wrong way.  If you would have said "to my suprise I even fit into a 4, yay!" people wouldn't be offended.  There is no perfect size for all women, everyone has an ideal weight that is proportionate for their bone structure but in the end its about being comfortable, healthy and feeling good about yourself way more than a number on a tag.

For the record dress sizes vary ridiculously just like all women's clothes so you might not be a 4 in other designers and really who gives a sh!t... the size is on the tag on the inside of the dress!  No one will know if its a 4 or 14 unless you tell them.  The key with a wedding gown is to find a dress that accents your body the way you like for it to and makes you feel gorgeous!

Also my dress is an 8, a 6 would have fit better in the hips and boobs but would have been too tight in the ribs as the 8 fit like a glove there.  I usually wear a 4 or 5 in pants and a 2 or 4 in dresses... when I told FI it was an 8 he said is it huge on you?  I said "no women's sizes are goofy babe its only a little loose in the hips and boobs" and he said "ah, no surprises there" haha. 

noelle24

If you are this obsessed with the number on your clothing label, then I doubt you'll ever be able to accept your body as it is. FWIW, I think you actually look pretty healthy in the old size 12 pic, and look almost too thin in the size 4 pics.

And numbers are just that... numbers. They don't mean anything.  I haven't been a size 4 since I was probably 10.  Not because I was a "fat" teenager, but because with my body frame, I will just never, ever be that thin.  The smallest I've been as an adult was an 8, and at that point you could almost see my ribs.  There's no point in my obsessing about being a smaller size because unless I take a hacksaw to my ribcage, hips and shoulder bones, it just ain't happenin'.

It is way, WAY more important to worry about being healthythan being the "perfect size 4".

nottheonlydreamer44

LOL to all of you ladies and a big thank you -

I know writing "perfect size 4" was not the best idea. I don't think a size 4 is perfect, I put quotes just because that is what these woman kept telling me. There is not a perfect size and there never will be. Not for me, not for anyone.
 
ITF - I will be sure to be more conscious of what I say before I say it. I was mostly just excited about the dresses but now I'm not sure on any of them. With everything going on I have been an indecisive mess and I was just posting here because I knew I couldn't put it on FB where FI could see.

Yes, I doubt I will ever be happy with my body, Noelle - it's a disorder and it bothers me every single day. I wish I could just stop caring but I can't. There's many reasons why that don't need to be put out to the world but this newest obsession is because my exbf told me a few months before I started dating FI that, "I think you would look so much better if you lost like 10 or 15 pounds." He was a diick, lol. At that point I was I believe 137ish, meds kicked in and the weight dropped to 128. Then I just kept going. It will probably never be enough, sadly.

 My mom is 4'11 and 104 pounds and I hate standing next to her because I feel like a giant. I have a happy life (for the most part) and great people around me and I am thankful for that.

In my logical mind I know a number means nothing. I generally wear a 3/5 in juniors because I'm too short for women's clothes. FWIW I felt beautiful in my last gown - though I slimmed down significantly after buying it ($400 of alterations later and I loved it even more) And I was 17 pounds heavier than I am now.



This was my '08 wedding and my fairytale princess dress. I LOVED it and I still put it on sometimes. Lame. So lame. lol. If someone wants to buy it I'm trying to sell it!

The fact is your all right - I do want to be part of "the group" I guess though I just like to be cool with everyone. I'm sorry I pissed people off it was not my intention AT ALL.

Whatever dress I find in whatever size I will get because it makes me feel beautifull not because of the number on the tag!

catemeg

All this talk about size is silly.  Size has really nothing to do with health or attractiveness... all it has to do with is the random number that the clothing manufacturer assigns to their line of clothing, usually with decreasing numbers to make women feel more attractive.  I can't tell you how many people I've heard say something along the lines of, "I won't buy anything in a size 10.  If I can't fit into a size 8, then I'm just going to lose weight until I do."   You should always dress for the size you are and be happy in your own skin - wearing clothes that fit is more important that squeezing into a certain size.

Marilyn Monroe was a size 12, and at one point a size 16 in the sizes of the day.  Today those sizes would be an 8 and a 10, just to show you how sizes have shifted drastically.  And if she isn't a timeless sex figure, then I don't know who could be considered one.  That said, I have friends who would look ridiculously overweight at that size since they're built smaller.  And I have friends who would look sickly at that size due to their full curves.  It's ridiculous that everyone is so focused on an ideal size.  We should all eat healthy and exercise - when we do that, whatever size and shape our bodies take is what we should try to enjoy and be proud of.

EDIT: NTOD, you might really want to talk to a counselor about your body issues.  Eating disorders can spiral out of control very quickly, and it's important to get help to find a weight and a lifestyle that you can be happy with. For what it's worth, I think you looked happy and healthy in your old dress.