I get it...

desertsun

Okay, you have a new baby, you're a first time Mom, everything your child does is a tiny miracle. I get it. But please, PLEASE, for the love of god, STOP posting on fb about your baby's poo.

It's seriously so, SO gross.

Now you go.

SassyBrass

Eww..
And agreed!

katanne9

Dear Social Security Office,

I get it. You are government paid workers who don't give a rip about running an efficient organization. You hate your job and you don't care that I need to get a new SS card to change my name. You work slower that dirt and I'm sick of wasting all my lunch breaks sitting in your crappy little office swamped with people when there is only one teller. How I'm supposed to get there when you are only open from 9 to 4 on weekdays is beyond me. Forgive me for having a full-time job and paying your salary with my taxes.

Oh, and thanks for responding to all my voicemails about setting up an appointment as it recommends on your website.

Not-Love,
Katanne


Phew, I feel better now.

[Deleted User]

Yeah, pretty gross.

What do I want my FB friends to stop posting about?  My cousin takes a picture of everything he eats in a restaurant (which is often, he's a 43 year old bachelor who can't cook) and posts those pictures. 

Another friend posts a different song lyric every single day and wants everyone to guess the song...getting old.

Goldlie11

Desert, that's gross.

Katanne, I HATE them too.  They put me through hell a couple of years back.  They take forever with everything.  

calindi

Landlord,

What you're doing is sketchy - you have not zoned our house as two apartments, yet you have another tenant living in the 'in-law apartment' attached to our home.  We signed the lease, we get it.  But that doesn't mean you get to screw us over by having us pay electricity for the bum of a next-door-neighbor who clearly is keeping his refrigerator open all day and leaving the AC on with the windows open.  Yes, he pays water.  We get it.  But water is not even a tenth of the amount we've been paying for electricity.  This has got to change.  You're an idiot if you don't think my boyfriend will report you for a zoning violation.  Make it easy on yourself - do the right thing, zone it for two apartments, set up different meters, and be done with it.

With loathing,
Your broke tenants


To our hippy 'photographer' neighbor,

We get that the walls are thin.  We definitely get that you like to blare your music.  But is it that unreasonable to ask you to turn it down after 10pm?  There's such a thing as a noise ordinance, and you're in violation.  Don't come over to our house again to try to "see how loud it is".  If we can hear it, it's too loud.  And yes, we know you can hear everything in our bathroom since we can hear you from there, so we'll make sure you have plenty to hear at 6am when we get up if you don't stop blaring your stupid music late at night.  You keep us up, we'll wake you up.

Always annoyed,
Your neighbors

musikbx

YES! How about the new feature that allows you to read the status of people you don't know, if one of your friends comments on it? Now, not only do I get to read about your kid going poopie in the potty, I get to read every other poop-related status you comment on... from people I don't even know. Not cool, Facebook. 

desertsun

I literally blocked not one but TWO people from my FB newsfeed for having child poo status updates today.

WTF is wrong with people? Not every person on your friends list is a parent or a person who wants to know about your child's BMs, so please, PLEASE don't put that info on FB.

loves2shop4shoes

Dear Friend from High School,

You really need to watch what you put on facebook.  In case you were wondering, it's inappropriate for a single 22-year old who isn't even DATING anyone to put pictures of her positive pregnancy test on facebook.  Are you really so desperate for ANY attention that you think this is a good idea?  Get therapy.

Warmest regards,

Shoes

nottheonlydreamer44

LOL Desert - i know exactly what you mean and it makes me wanna die. Also anyone that does NOTHING but post pictures of their kid and talk about their kid or their spouse. Once in awhile is okay but if it can land you here then you need to stop.

Dear former MOH and BFF,

I get that you're an evil and cruel bitch but there's no need to try and pretend you're happy. We all know you're not so please stop writing statuses trying to make me "upset" and act like a 30 year old. Instead of coming off like a jealous and insecure hoe. Also, inform your crazy ass sister that she does not need to defend your honor or get all uppity over a status message that had NOTHING to do with your dumb ass. However, I think it's hilarious you immediately thought it was directed towards you. ***I'll stop being "mean" when you stop being an idiot". Grow up and stop being a skank - thanks!

No more love, Dreamer

*I apologize for this but she was my best friend and she said some of the meanest things I have ever heard to me last week. That friendship is over and I've taken the high road, until now.*

Wrkn925

Dear Facebook parent,

I'm luckier than these other posters.  You've only shared a *few* poo stories with me, and that was just during potty training.  I understand your excitement.
Coworker-posted once during pottytraining.
Cousin-posted once regarding getting peed on for the first time after bringing his son home from hospital.
Both funny, but you get one.  That's your one.

HOWEVER, please post an occasional picture of yourself.  Your baby is adorable, and I love the pics, but I need to remember what you look like.
I have denied requests before from old classmates because I didn't recognize that little Suzie was a spitting image of her mother.

Signed,

Childless friend who will
probably eat her words



 

prodigalgirl

First, I am a mom.  And even though my daughter is potty training, I would NEVER subject my Facebook friends to posts about her poop!!  That's just gross.

Now,

Dear Landlord,
I get it.  I get that any rent check delivered after September 3 is considered late.  I get that there is a late fee associated.  I also get that you can't expect the mail to be delivered overnight and rent checks that are mailed must be mailed in advance.  BUT, when I send a rent check on August 27, I would expect that rent check to be to your office WELL BEFORE September 7, when you say you received it.  I think a late fee of $105 is ridiculous when it seems fishy to me that you didn't receive my check until ELEVEN DAYS after I sent it.  Your office is just across town!!
Your angry tenant (who won't be a tenant for much longer)

MLekathLEEN

• I don't not need to hear how much you love you husband. I know you do, otherwise I'm pretty sure you would not have married him.
• Sure one duck face picture is tolerable but 30 of them is ONE DAY is a bit of an overload and completely unnecessary. It is also unnecessary to post your entire camera phone photo shoot onto facebook, duckface or not.
• I do not care about what you ate today, how many miles you ran, or how many crunches you have done.Telling your facebook friends they should do the same makes me think you're an asshole.

Narwhal

Dear EVERY PROFESSOR I HAVE THIS SEMESTER, DAGGUMIT,

I get it. We're supposed to "learn time management."  I have plenty of that, believe me.  But acting like we only have one class all semester (Here's looking at you, Biology for Science Majors) and the rest of the time we act like crazy party animals and go streaking and pee on things is not the answer.  Please remember that some of us actually are studious, some of us have 6, sometimes even 7 classes each week and there is not enough hours in the day to dedicate 3 hours each night to your homework... each.  And that is if you forget bathroom and food breaks.  Time management should not include excluding basic life necessities.

Thank you for your cooperation,

Nar.

breezerb

Dear Drunken Bar Patron,

Yes I have been here before, I work here moron.  None of your cheesy pickup lines are going to work on me bucko.  No I don't want you to talk to me, hug me, buy me a drink or try and pick me up.  Yes, they pay me to be nice to you but no amount of money can make me be "that" nice. You are hammered and I am stone sober, this means I, in no way, find your bumbling, stumbling self even remotely attractive.  I have the power to have you tossed out on your ass if you even glance at me funny, and don't think I won't.

Thanks for your money jacka$$,
Bree

Penny66

Dear Coworker,
 No one wants to hear your music.Please if you want to play your music loud shut your door. It is ridiculous that when I shut my door I can still hear your music from across the hall way.

Dear Next Door Neighbor,
  I absolutely love dogs, but seriously you need to train then not to bark. They should not be barking at a leaf blowing in the wind when they are in the house. I understand that dogs bark but this is getting out of hand, I can seriously hear this when I am in my house with all of the doors and windows shut.

Dear SO's sister
  Everyone knows that you are engaged. We don't need to hear "Going to the mall with fiance" or "Eating breakfast with fiance" "I love my fiance so much". I understand that you are excited to be engaged but you have been engaged for a LONG TIME!!! 

Dear FB Friend,
  Seriously you are 27 and you say foodin very single day! One or two times might be comical, but every single day just makes you look dumb. I don't care that you are "foodin, school, foodin, practice, meet with friends so we can do some foodin, home bed"

Sincerely,
Penny