The new F word...

LittleMissCutiePie

It's like every time I open a post with FMIL in the title, it's about crazy drama. The mere mention of FMILs seem to bring out the cray cray drama. Maybe it's the new F word. Or like Beetlejuice. Say it enough, and sh!t goes down.

goobersinlove

I totally agree with you. Though I'm part of the epidemic.  My FMIL is cray cray!

I jwish we could here some GOOD FMIL stories.  Anybody out there have a GOOD FMIL?

goobersinlove

Duds that's so wonderful!!! Sounds like you know just how blessed you really are.

achiduck

Just like Duds, I really lucked out with my ILs (well, except FI's step mother, but she doesn't really count). FMIL has been nothing but wonderful to me since day one.

danigirl7181

I have a wonderful FMIL, she is doing the alterations on my dress, all 7 of my bridesmaides dresses, making my veil, and making our daughters flower girl dress. Plus the wedding is at the family farm where FILs live. She is such a big help, she does give her opinion which isn't always the same as mine, but if I don't agree she is okay with it. I love FIs family, they are wonderful and made me feel like family from the first time I met them.

Sarah5200

My FMIL is awesome. One of the best women I've ever had the fortune of knowing. I really feel sorry for all of these ladies that seem to have poor relationships with their FMILs!

musicxstore

My FMIL and FFIL are amazing and the nicest people you will meet. They've accepted me as part of the family and took time to get to know me (i.e. FMIL is always sending me things I may like on Pinterest). However, FSIL is a mixed bag of nuts. I still have no idea where she came from since she's unlike anyone else in his family.

jennipea382

I like my FI's family! I feel pretty close to his parents, especially his mom. They're really easygoing and fun to be around. As for wedding stuff, they're not completely involved at the moment. We've talked to them about things, but right now FMIL has seen dress pictures but that's about it. FMIL has offered to help out with any crafty things I need done. They can't contribute financially (I'd never expect them to even if they were better off) so I think she wants to help out in any way she can!

The only person I'm a little iffy on is FBIL. I have no real problem with him but he somehow attracts the WORST women. The girl he's dating now has a therapist that comes to her home and constantly questions him. The one before that.. that's a long story. She's crazy. Like.. seriously crazy. He just recently had to go to court because she wanted money back for all these random gifts she kept sending him after he said it was over. Not to mention she was/is wanted in another state for theft and child abuse (which is why none of her 4 kids live with her..). How he stayed with her as long as he did I don't know. Anyways, that got long.. lol. Other than the people he associates with he's usually ok.

ETA: Oh! I just thought of something cute! A couple days after FI proposed we went to his parent's house for a bit. His dad had been cleaning out the garage and found a bunch of FMIL's father's jewelry that he made. So he came up to me with this pretty silver ring with a jade stone and said "will you be my daughter in law?" I thought that was so cute lol. I got to keep a few of FI's grandpa's things which is really cool since I never got to meet him!

Chobot

My fmil went to Kleinfelds with me so she is golden in my book! Jk. There is more to it of course, but she always is supportive and welcomed me after one week. Love her.

LittleMissCutiePie

My FMIL is awesome too. I'm just sayin', the Knot is running rampant (and has since I joined) with FMIL haters. :P

Madisonpenny

My FMIL is pretty awesome as well and has been from the start and  yes I know how lucky I am... lots of TK posters have solidified that

cwaggoner07

I'm so jealous of you girls! But happy for you too.

My FMIL has been married 6 times, and FFIL raised all of her kids when she ran out of town (including the ones that weren't boilogically his). His wife now is GREAT and I consider her my FMIL, but bio-FMIL is BSC. Seriously.
Right after we got engaged FI's older sister pulled me aside to warn me that she would go beserk during wedding planning, and she was right. Aside from her, though, his siblings, his father, and his stepmom are AMAZING so, yeah, there's one but of cray in his family, but they all seem determined to protect me from her.

blgrout

My FILs are awesome.  FI's whole family is awesome.  The only problems we have had with them, wedding wise, has been the fact that FI's dad wants to bring their dog to the wedding (he's very old and sick, but animals are not allowed in the venue unless they are service animals), and FMIL bought a cream colored skirt and blouse set to wear at the wedding. His family lives just far enough away from us that we don't get to see them much, so we enjoy any time we get with them.  Considering some of the problems I hear about from other brides who have BSC future in laws, I feel pretty blessed.

ChristineM130

FMIL is an amazing woman who has done really amazing things in her life. I am blown away by the contributions she's made to society and the difficulties she has overcome.

That being said, she's actually quite mean, but I'm learning to find it pretty funny. FI always sticks up for me around her, and I'm so thankful that he's man enough to not let her walk all over me like some men on these posts do. I think she's coming around, she's starting to like me better, but really likes the ex more.

Yeah, she liked FI's last partner much more than me, and so ex receives direct invites from FMIL to everything we do together, even when we visit her 8 hours away for a weekend. Which is really really wrong on her part, but not so much a disaster for us. I find it kind of hurtful that she always finds the need for ex to be there when I'm around, but we are good friends and always have a blast together, I know his desire is for me and ex desires someone else, I love ex dearly too etc. etc. There's no hard feelings, so I just figure at least someone's excited to see FMIL. 

I think it stresses FI more than it bothers us girls! Since we got engaged, he confronted her directly about this practice (right when she was starting to get excited about our wedding; probably not the best time). And they got into a big fight and she was even more resentful for awhile.

But since this is a good FMIL thread, I'll share the happy ending: She lives 8 hours away, and we have the technology to silence the phone! At least she's coming to our wedding, dealing with getting her other children there, and she's going to try to be nice. She's coming around, and I'm sure she'll love me eventually.

And I can't wait to send our kids to boot camp at grandma's for the summers! They're going to be on their best behavior when they come back.

morenachica110

My problem isn't my FMIL... it's MY mother. >.<

amyb140

My H's mom died 20 years ago - I'm really sad I never got to meet her.  He absolutely adored her.

His dad died 2 months after our first date, and I never got to meet him either.  They had somewhat of a strained relationship, but I still wish I could have met him.  H actually proposed that night after the funeral.

He also has no siblings except a half-sister who lives in Austria.  We don't see her often, and she's crazy.

So I have NO in-laws, which I must say is kind of a blessing  I am extremely close to my family, and now so is H.  He always says he met me at just the right time because I gave him a new family.

brosters

My FMIL is amazing! Couldn't have asked for better in laws. I'm a lucky girl.

brandichamberlain

I prefer my FMIL to my own mother.  In fact she does all the planning with me.  I am like Duds.  I love FI's whole family.

TheBaney

I definitely lucked out in the in law department. I get along great with FI's parents, and we're currently renting a house with his two brothers. His parents have their own opinions about how things should be done (esp. when it comes to the wedding) but they mean well.

LoisLane007

And when you're married, it becomes the 'M' word

NikkiZ81

When I first met his family, they all loved me. As time has gone on, FMIL seems to love me less... and less... She's still hooked on my FI's x (because she's the mother of the current  baby of the family I think). I suspect she'll warm up after we start having children (however there is no way in H I'm leaving our kids alone with her! Sad but true!) Fortunatly for me, FFIL and all the other siblings love me, and I them. They have welcomed me as family since the beginning and I'm fortunate to be included in their lives. They are a close knit family, and I look forward to getting back into FMIL's good graces (though I adore my FI for his support and enduring love of me).
Any advice, I'm listening! Thanks

amandamarielynn

I'm so glad to see so many other ladies breaking the "Horrible FMIL" stereotypes! I absolutely LOVE my future in-laws. And actually, they dont' allow me to call them "in-laws", we address each other as we would blood family. And after meeting his cousin... we're SO CLOSE. I talk to her almost as much as I do my fi. And, despite the whole "OMG Muslim men don't permit their wives to talk to other men" and his family being conservative, they're TOTALLY fine with my best friend being a guy and have welcomed HIM into their family too. And my family absolutely loves my fiance. Our families have even gotten close... if it wasn't for us being an interracial couple, you would never be able to pick out who was biologically related to who at a get-together because everyone gets along so well. I am so completely and totally blessed in this regard. And I still find a way to communicate with his mother even though her English isn't good and neither is my Bangla (Bengali). Sometimes, there is no need for words... :-)


@Nikki- Have you tried setting up a bi-weekly brunch together? Maybe you should have every other week where you have a brunch with your bio mum and every other week with her. That way she feels special in your life. If she doesn't warm up, then that's her problem. You can ask your fi for advice on how to get her to warm up to you too, I hope.

TNBride2012

*grins* I'm right there with Duds and PP, my future in-laws are amazing! They've been so accepting and welcoming of me, which is great, because my OWN mother (and family) decided to go a bit crazy when I started dating FI. Reason: Even though I was pretty much always( and still am!) blissfully happy with him, he's not "who they would have picked out for me, and they've never been wrong." Uggh, totally agree about preferring FMIL to my own mother.....;-)

sboughten

My FI fits right in with my family and they love him, and my FMIL and her husband are great.  FI father died when he was in middle school, but sounded like an amazing person.  I'm lucky to be part of a great family, even the step-sisters and their families are great

NikkiZ81

@Amanda, Thanks for the input! It's something to think about, certainly. My FI assures me his mom likes me, but he's good at not seeing what he doesn't want to see. She's not cruel to me, or anything like that, it's just subtle comments she makes or pointed looks in my direction. I have my suspicions about why she dislikes me, and I think it has alot to do with my FI becoming less dependant on her and her opinions and listening to what I have to say as well. She and I are very different people with different personalities and interests, not to mention opinions!!
I'm blessed to have a FFIL and a couple FSILs who love me, and I them. If one person in his entire family doesn't love me, that's a small price to pay, though I wish that wasn't even an issue.
Ok, enough!! Thanks for listening to me rant!!!
~N.