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change of plans.

I talked to my FI and I have expressed that I wanted a small hometown wedding. I have two venues picked out. Our town park with all the historic details, the clock tower from the original town school, the wooden covered bridge over the river and the historic canal boat that floats in the canal behind the gazebo. It also has flowering trees. My second venue is a historic town mansion of the first off shore oil driller. The park is beautiful and so is the mansion which was recently bought by my grandfather's cousin. I will not ask which you guys think is best but I like talking to you guys. 

The one thing I am dealing with and trying to get over is that a friend's wedding in this park is the last time I saw my friend before his drunk driving accident that killed him. Every time I walk through the park I remember and I feel him there. Its kind of a bittersweet place for me. My FI worries it would be too much for us to get married there. He is afraid the emotions of the day and the memory of my friend would be too much for me. 

He may be right but I feel that getting married in the park would help me feel like he was there with us. He always liked weddings and just being with all of us. I think a few tears will be shed that day for all the ones I've lost in the past few years that I wanted to be there. My grandfather, my best friend, my uncles, and my great grandmothers I had a great bond with all of them. 

On another note can you have a remembrance candle for multiple people? like one candle for each side for all the people lost or is just one ok? Not sure of the proper way to do this.

Re: change of plans.

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    We are having a memorial candle for all everyone we've lost on our guestbook table- on that note, nobody will know it's a memorial candle but us, it's just a simple white w/ jewls candle. It doesn't have anything that would bring others down- memorial candles I think are a double enged sword you want to do something to remember them, but you don't want to bring the day down. Keep that in mind.
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    I'd go with the mansion over the park.  Sounds like it would be too difficult for you in the park.  
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    Thank you for all of your great advice. I think that one candle would be good for the combined relatives. My mom was asking if I would want a locket with a picture of my grandfather, her father, on my bouquet and I'm considering it. I think that with it being in a locket no one would see it and it would make me feel close to him and I could look at his picture before and after.  
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