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friend uncomfortable with ex

My guy  best friend, Jesse,  was dating a guy for three years. I became friends with the guy and we are still very close even though they broke up they had a very amicable breakup and stayed friends for awhile afterward). My friend now has a new boyfriend that seems very controlling to me, but I don't get involved with that.
I am inviting Jesse's ex to my wedding because I want him at my celebration. I asked jesse if this was ok first and he said yes, it was fine. A month later, he calls me and tells me that he thinks I'm being "crappy" by inviing his ex and that if his new boyfriend sees the ex, he'll punch him. I told him that, though I'm sorry there might be some discomfort, I am still inviting the ex because we've become very good friends (A better friend than Jesse at times!). Jesse has not talked to me for two months. I'm still planning on inviting them all to the wedding (with a warning that if anyone causes a problem that person will be asked to leave).
I'm feeling defeated. Opinions?

Re: friend uncomfortable with ex

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    Invite who you want to be there. They can choose to be jealous teenagers or they can choose to be adults. Its up to them. Let them make their own decisions, and don't exclude a good friend because another good friend has some made up problem with them. 
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    I agree with Sarah. It's your wedding. Don't let the 12 year old dictate who you invite!
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    Ditto Sarah.
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    Ditto rick dittoing sarah.  Adults understand that sometimes they will be placed in awkward social situations and know how to act in these situations accordingly.  He can man up or not come.  Had there been abuse or a very bitter breakup I would be more understanding.   But it was amicable.  This is just someone being a drama llama for the sake of it.   And the punching part?  Oh FFS grow up. 

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    "Whatever East. You're just mad I RSVP'd "lame" to your pre-wedding sleepover."
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    Lol, thank you all of you! I thought I was right in that situation, but i wanted some other opinions. You've each handed me a ball! Lol
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    I read this as "friend uncomfortable with sex" and I thoughy, "huh, that's unfortunate."
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    I would also be tempted to say "Well in that case you understand why I am not inviting your current bf" but that would be mean and rude.
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    I actually wish I didn't have to invite his current bf.. This guy has been pulling my friend away from all of his friends, closing him off from everyone..
    But if I want to give my friend the chance to come at all, I have to invite his bf. IF they're even together by the time of the wedding, that is.
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    Update:
    Everything was blamed on me and "Jesse" isn't coming to the wedding. Actually he ended our twenty year friendship. Because I wouldn't hate the ex that he was okay with before his new guy.
    What a friend, right
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    AnysunriseAnysunrise member
    Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited September 2010
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_friend-uncomfortable-ex?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:1a1ee316-61be-4b67-b05c-101fbf8f48ecPost:209d6049-7d4d-4ba8-8e0d-85f99ae7364b">Re: friend uncomfortable with ex</a>:
    [QUOTE]Update: Everything was blamed on me and "Jesse" isn't coming to the wedding. Actually he ended our twenty year friendship. Because I wouldn't hate the ex that he was okay with before his new guy. What a friend, right
    Posted by brimorey[/QUOTE]

    Wow. That's pretty sh*tty. I'd say he saved you some trouble, but from what I've read, I wouldn't be surprised that if him and current bf break up, he'll apologize.
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