Wedding Ceremony & Reception Music Discussions

Debating with fiance over line dances

I hate line dances (The Electric Slide, etc.) with a firey, firey passion, so much so that I almost did my own reception music to ensure that they wouldn't be played.  However, I know I can be a micromanager sometimes, so after discussion with my fiance and some friends we decided to hire a DJ.  Line dances have been at the top of the "Do Not Play" list from the beginning, though.

Yesterday, my fiance was teasing me about smashing cake in my face at teh reception, and I was begging him not to.  (As much money as I'm putting into my dress and hair and makeup, I don't want icing all over it)  Eventually, I asked what I could bargain with him so he wouldn't do it, and he said, "I like having this to hold over your head.  I won't do it if you include line dances."  My first response was "no," to which he responded in a pretty angry sounding tone that I'm too picky and dictating the  things he's interested in helping with.  (For the most part he's been totally uninterested in helping to plan, which is fine because I love planning stuff, so this comment really threw me for a loop.)

I really don't want to fight over this, so I'm tempted to just give in and include the stupid dances, but I'm afraid that I'll  end up feeling really resentful about the whole thing.  Thoughts?  Advice?

Re: Debating with fiance over line dances

  • I get the hatred for line dances. I do. BUT I'm so glad our dj played a couple, because it was the ONLY time some of the guests got up to dance, and I had more fun then than other parts of dancing because the floor felt so FULL. Yeah, it's totally cheesy, but I was so glad we did it for the pictures, the memories, and to dance around the floor with everyone.
  • You're worried about feeling resentful about giving in on this point, but it sounds like your fiance is already feeling resentful.  The fact that he is holding the threat of smashing cake in your face over you is a concern.  I think you need to step back and reflect, and have a discussion with him.  Yes, you like to plan, and you should be able to include things you like, but remember it's HIS wedding too.  He may want to have more input than you realize.  I know you said he is "uninterested in helping to plan" but stop and think.  Is he uninterested, or are you steamrolling over him with decisions you've already made?

    I realize that sounds blunt, but it's coming from experience.  I was totally steamrolling over my now-H in the early stages of planning, assuming (wrongly) that he wouldn't be interested in the details.  I couldn't have been more wrong and I'm glad I took the time to talk to him and get his input.  

    Image and video hosting by TinyPic 
  • I definitely understand your hatred of line dances as my FI and I share them. But I was told by my dad that my family will be super disappointed if they don't at least get one. So I'm tossing one in and will use that time to not be on the dance floor.
     Visit The Knot!                                           image
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards