How should I go about telling my FSIL her boyfriend can not be in the family pictures even though my sister's fiance will be in them? I know my sister isn't married yet but she is getting married a few months after my wedding. Her and her fiance have been together for 6 years. My FSIL is only 23 and who knows what is going to happen with her relationship down the road. My fiance said I need to handle this because she is going to be pissed off. What is the best way to go about this with out offending anyone? The last thing I want to do is piss off my In Laws before getting married!
P.S, Me and my fiance are on the West coast while our families are back east. My fiance only met her boyfriend a few times.....
Re: Excluding Someone From Family Pictures
updated 9/27/11
OUR WEDDING 11/13/2010
My Planning Bio UPDATED 11/8/2010
You are absolutely within your rights to tell her he is not allowed to be in any of the family pictures. But please don't be hurt when she doesn't want you in any of her family pictures at her wedding.
I am not sure what your issue is with the boyfriend. It certainly seems like you are judging their relationship and don't expect it to last. How would you feel if someone made if blatantly obvious that they expected you and your FI to get divorced? There may very well be issues that you didn't mention. Your reasons may be valid. That doesn't change the fact that she is going to be very hurt when you tell her you don't consider her future husband family.
You said the last thing you want to do is piss off your in laws right before the wedding. Trust me when I say that they will pissed off for a very long time and you may permanently sever that relationship if you try to pull this.
Your FI has told you that she will be pissed. I certainly can't blame her. And I certainly don't blame him for making you be the one to deliver this bit of cheerful news. There is no nice way to do this.