Pre-wedding Parties

Only bridesmaid expensive parties! help!

Hi, new poster here!

I've been planning my March 2013 wedding for 6 months. My best friend, who is my maid of honor I have 3 in my entourage total recently got engaged too, and is having her wedding a month after mine.

She is having a small 20 people wedding at a courthouse, followed by a 100 guest reception. Since the ceremony will be so small, she's asked me to be her maid of honor and then later informed me I will be her only attendant.

I am a little stressed out at trying to fulfill my duties as her maid of honor, but that's not the problem. She wants an allout bridal shower 30 and a big bachelorette party, including 10 girls, fancy dinner, and clubs. I am a bride on a serious budget and I simply cannot afford to host one party on my own, let alone two. My own bachelorette party is going to be a simple dinner and go kart racing. Anyway all of these expenses will fall right around my wedding day or right after. I wish her wedding would be six months later so I could afford everything, but obviously I wouldn't ask her to move it. She has suggested a cobachelorette party but I don't wantt to ask MY other bridesmaids to pay for parties that are so extravagant and not my style.

What can I do? Any advice would be really helpful. I know I need to talk to her, but I don't know where to start. I don't want to be rude or selfish.

Re: Only bridesmaid expensive parties! help!

  • You have no obligation to throw a party, she is taking advantage of you by requesting such a big fancy party! I told my MOH whatever fit her budget. We just played your typical silly bridal shower games, but everyone loved it! And for the bachlorette party, we basiclally just did a slumber party. It was fun to act like high school girls and have a girl's night out. 

    I can't believe how rude she is to tell you this is what I want and you have to pay for it. Just do what you can and if she wants her big fancy party, then she'll have to pay for it herself. 
  • Thank you! It's so refreshing hearing other takes on it. My FI is super hardheaded think a 35 year old Red Forman from That 70s show and he thinks I should just back out but I dont want to. I didn't realize that people who were invited to the ceremony were the ones who should be included, so thank you! Now that I'm armed with outside advice, I think what I'll do is sit down with her over lunch and hash this out. I can only imagine that she's probably a little worried about finances herself with her own wedding so close to mine. Thanks again!
  • MairePoppyMairePoppy Connecticut mod
    Moderator Tenth Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its
    ditto pps.

    If you decide that  you would like to host a shower,  it's okay to ask others if they would like to  co-host with you. Do you know any of the brides other close friends or relatives? The shower and bp do not have to be thrown by the wedding party.

This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards