do I give a gift?

kolsen737

One of my good friends from college is getting married. I am going to the wedding but it is to much on my budget to go to the shower as well. She lives 2 hours away and for a few hour event I feel like its to much.  Should I still send her a gift for her shower or not?

lauraf1202

Your call.  For a good friend, I would.  But I don't think people would be surprised to NOT receive a gift from someone who couldn't attend a shower, you know? 

sister2groom

Agree that it's your call. Although, just from my personal perspective, even if it was a good friend I probably wouldn't send a shower gift, I would just send a slightly more substantial wedding gift. I'm a fan of shipping, not bringing, non-cash/gift card wedding gifts so paying shipping twice just seems silly, if I'm not even going to attend the shower.

loop0406

I personally send a gift if I don't attend an event out of courtesy. I would send a small gift from her registry with a card.

janicejab

  I couldn't make it to a friend's shower this past summer. I didn't send a gift for it, but I did buy them an extra nice wedding gift.

i2012do

Maybe things are different where you are from.
But I think, and this is IMO that you absolutely should 100% send a gift.
Even if its a small gift for $20 bucks that fits in your budget. Go to Bed bath beyod, get something small from the registry- or even a Cook book for $15 bucks and send it along with a nice note.

Its the thought. You said it was a close friend.

nurse.misty

I don't think you have to send a gift if it just isn't in your budget. I would still send a nice card and well wishes though. I couldn't afford to send a friend a gift recently. I ended up buying/sending her wedding present last month even though her wedding was in September. I just didn't have the money and she totally understood.

VRL

I would never expect a family member or friend to send a gift to my bridal shower if they couldn't attend.

If you feel obligated, send a nice card. If it were me, just the fact that my close friend was thinking of me, especially when she couldn't be there, would mean the world to me.

StephieBow

If it is a good friend of mine, I send a gift if I'm going to miss the shower (or I find a way to see her another time to give it to her depending on where she lives.)

Even though I can't be there, I still want to be able to participate in some way.  That said, it is entirely up to you.  Turn the question around - if you were getting married, would you think it was really nice that that particular friend sent you something even though she couldn't be there with you.