Bridal Shower and Second Reception Etiquitee

jdonoghue06

I am getting married in NJ in March.  I come from a very large family.  Most of my family is in New England.  Nearly all of my cousins are married with young children.  We are trying to keep our numbers down because I am a full time student, so we opted not to invite them to the wedding.  Truthfully, I think that it would be difficult and expensive for them to travel during that time of the year.  We are holding a second reception next summer back in New England.  It will be much more casual than the initial reception, but I want the opportunity to celebrate with my family.

My question is:  Is it okay to invite my cousins to the bridal shower when they will not be invited to the actual wedding, but rather just the second reception? 

covejack

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_pre-wedding-parties_bridal-shower-second-reception-ettiquite?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:32Discussion:ccddbaf2-7192-4fa8-8a45-5f0f40508996Post:0724fa4d-3703-4347-9037-6388c7cac525">Bridal Shower and Second Reception Etiquitee</a>:
[QUOTE]I am getting married in NJ in March.  I come from a very large family.  Most of my family is in New England.  Nearly all of my cousins are married with young children.  We are trying to keep our numbers down because I am a full time student, so we opted not to invite them to the wedding.  Truthfully, I think that it would be difficult and expensive for them to travel during that time of the year.  We are holding a second reception next summer back in New England.  It will be much more casual than the initial reception, but I want the opportunity to celebrate with my family. My question is:  Is it okay to invite my cousins to the bridal shower when they will not be invited to the actual wedding, but rather just the second reception? 
Posted by jdonoghue06[/QUOTE]

I wouldn`t invite anyone to the shower that isn`t on the real wedding guest list. The other reception is kind of a consolation prize really for those not invited to the actual wedding.

I`d invite eveyone to the actual wedding, and let people decided whether or not it would be difficult and expensive for them to attend rather than holding two parties.

Good luck with your planning though!

waltzingmatilda13

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_pre-wedding-parties_bridal-shower-second-reception-ettiquite?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:32Discussion:ccddbaf2-7192-4fa8-8a45-5f0f40508996Post:4a2286b7-7697-45dc-85bc-308d70a8c407">Re: Bridal Shower and Second Reception Etiquitee</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Bridal Shower and Second Reception Etiquitee : I wouldn`t invite anyone to the shower that isn`t on the real wedding guest list. The other reception is kind of a consolation prize really for those not invited to the actual wedding. I`d invite eveyone to the actual wedding, and let people decided whether or not it would be difficult and expensive for them to attend rather than holding two parties. Good luck with your planning though!
Posted by covejack[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>Exactly this. It's not for you to decide what is too expensive for other people and it sounds like you're using that as a poor excuse because you can't afford to invite people. You really should try to cut back on expenses and invite everyone to the wedding instead of throwing a 2nd reception later in the year. I think a lot of people will find that second party rude and insulting. 

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LoisLane007

Just think of how much you'll save not having a second reception.