Planning my own bachelorette/lingerie/girls night out party?

jueunhae

So my maid of honor is planning a bridal shower for me, but because of a lot of my mom's older, traditional friends, and some kids/grandkids are going to be there, decided to make it a garden/kitchen theme (i.e. bring a garden/kitchen tool) rather than the original lingerie theme. She then said that if I wanted we could make the bachelorette party have a 'bring a lingerie gift!' theme but I feel really bad making her do another thing, so I was wondering if it's okay if I planned the bachelorette party myself?

I did see in an earlier post that a bachelorette party thrown by the bride is awkward because it would imply the guests are supposed to pay for it instead of the bride, so I would call it a 'Girl's night out', in order that I could plan/pay for it myself. Does this sound okay? If so, how would one word such an invitation?

ShakeUpTampa

Girls night out, expect NO gifts. Throwing a party in your own honor is tacky and normally no gifts (you know how your parents threw you birthday parties?) same deal. You can do a girls night out but don't make mention of lingerie, gifts, or anything relating to the wedding.

AdeleDazeem

If your friend wants to throw you a shower and a bachelorette, that is totally fine.  As long as she knows she doesn't HAVE to throw you these parties and is doing it because she truly wants to, just let her go ahead.

And no, don't throw or plan your own bachelorette.  You can have a girls night out, but you can't expect gifts.

ForeverEverAfter

I'm also hoping to have a combined lingerie shower/bach party (though I didn't have a shower). My MOH would be hosting, but I'll help with some of it bc she won't be in town until the week before the wedding. If your MOH offered to do it, accept, but tell her you feel bad she's doing both and offer to help her and chip in for it. She seems to want to do it, so she'd likely appreciate the help.