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Texas-Dallas and Ft. Worth
We can't finish paying for our wedding
My fiance' and I got engaged last year. We were originally scheduled to be married this past January, but with him losing his job, that wasn't financially possible. We've rescheduled the wedding for June of this year. He has been getting unemployment, we were able to secure our venue and pay a few things. Well, his unemployment ran out last week, and he still doesn't have a job. We still have not paid for our catering, photographer, invites, the rest of the venue, or the rest for our DJ. I have a feeling that with just my income and only two months until the day, that we will be majorly short and have to postpone again. What should I do? I find it frustrating that I may have to put off yet another wedding. If we postpone again, we will lose all of our deposits. I am not confident that in the Dallas, TX economy that he will find a job by then. What should I do? We need at least $4000 to pay off the remaining things that I mentioned, and I don't see that happening with me having to pay all the bills. I'm at the point where I just want to say forget it and move on. Any suggestions? Anyone out there in the DFW area willing to donate their services? I'm sorry if I'm rambling, but I really just needed to vent, and see if anyone can help us.
Signed,
A distressed bride
Signed,
A distressed bride
This discussion has been closed.
Re: We can't finish paying for our wedding
Can you scale back what you have booked at all (especially in terms of catering)?
I'm not so good with the advice... Can I interest you in a sarcastic comment?
I understand it would be hard to just walk away from a deposit, but you can still get married, so you don't have to consider it a waste even if you can't use the venue you put the deposit down on.
Talk with your FI and decide what's really important about your wedding. For my FI, it would be to get married in our church -- we'd just move to the small chapel, invite only our immediate family, and take them out to dinner afterward. If the location isn't as important, you can go to a JoP or hire an officiant to marry you in a public park with your family there, maybe? Just brainstorm what else you could do that would still be meaningful and special to both of you.
I know this is easier said that done, though, and I feel for ya. I wish you the best of luck, whatever you decide to do!
You don't need caterers, photographers, etc, to go get married. People every day go to the JP and get married. It depends on what's really important here. And, in all honesty, I would have either gone to the JP months ago or we would not have started planning a wedding until he had another job again. Priorities. You need them.
I agree w/what everyone else is saying. You don't have to postpone again but you probably need to scale back on your expenses and think about what you really need. There are plenty of ideas on the Budget Board and I know that you can really cut your costs.
Have you thought of maybe just having a friend or family member go and pick up the food? (it is much less expensive when you don't have caterer's delivering and serving the food- guests can serve themselves buffet style!)
Also, is a DJ and venue with a dance floor really that important? Maybe just have an hour or so of dancing afterward for your first dance, etc... but in reality I've noticed that only about 25-50% of people really stay to dance all night so is it worth it to spend a fortune on a DJ and venue with a dance floor?
I completely feel your pain. We planned a wedding with my parents intending on paying for it. But my dads business closed and they now are living paycheck to paycheck. I never would have planned as big of a wedding if I would have known what situation we'd be in, because now my FI are paying for everything when I was just working temp jobs. Luckily I did just get a job, so we are ok so far.
If you haven't put a deposit for the photographer, caterer and DJ I would cancel them. And scale back. See if you could do just cake and punch reception. You can get sheet cakes from the grocery store or even cupcakes. Do the invitations yourself or use VP and use one of their free products like a postcard. See if your venue has a sound system and you can use an ipod for your music. Pretty much try to save as much as you can.
[QUOTE] I have a feeling that with just my income and only two months until the day, that we will be majorly short and have to postpone again. Posted by niashanta@yahoo.com[/QUOTE]
I'm not sure that I understand this. Will you be short, or can it be salvaged? I wouldn't trust my wedding to a 'feeling' that I could get it all paid for in time if we are dealing with lack of income. The tone of your overall post gives me the impression that you will come up short. The sooner you decide one way or the other, the sooner you'll be able to let go of that pressure and stress.
I agree with PP's--either ask your vendors to postpone or scale back. I wouldn't confirm a date until you know you'll be able to go through with it, since your vendors may be weary of another re-schedule. There are plenty of ways to DIY, and the reception isn't mandatory although the industry has made us believe that it isn't really a wedding without one.
I don't really know what to tell you other than cut back the vendors that you've already put down deposits with & forget about the ones that you haven't yet.
[QUOTE]So you put down deposits & started planning everything while he was on unemployment? That was a really bad idea.
Posted by TexanTreasure08[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>This. I'm not trying to make you feel even worse about the situation, but that really was a bad idea. It's even sort of offensive. But, like others have said, you guys can still get married. You just need to prioritize and get creative. Stop thinking about what a typical wedding looks like, and start thinking about what is most important to you and go from there. Smaller guest list, iPod music, pick-up catering, DIY projects, bulk flower delivery services (ie. <a href="http://www.fiftyflowers.com)," rel='nofollow'>www.fiftyflowers.com),</a> will all help with the budget. And there's always the JP.
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eBay.... We have sold a TON of stuff on eBay. Just about everything around the house that we don't want anymore. This has become my part time job since I'm unemployed. And we sold our gym equipment we never use. I'm also thinking about selling the sofa. (we are moving away right after the wedding, and I don't want to take it with us, so its sell it now, or sell it later)
FI worked for the florist (he has experience) during V-day, helped pay a huge portion of the flower bill.
We hired a recent college grad to do our photography, got a great deal!
Our DJ is FI's Uncle
Downsizing our wedding rings. cheap plain silver rings, mine has smaller diamonds than I originally wanted.
We called the venue, and let her know the unemployment situation, and asked her what it would cost to cancel. She called me back a week later, and cut a few costs for us. We are doing the cheapest food option
These are just some things that worked for me. I'm not saying they will work for you, but maybe they can give you some ideas.