A sobering thought

SueR13

Right now I'm single a little longer than I was married and together with my ex.

But I realized last week that I've never really lived full-time with adults other than my parents. Even though I was married close to 14 years, my ex-husband traveled between 30 and 50% of the time.

Now I'm thinking it's going to be an even bigger adjustment to living with FI than I was thinking it would be!

Sloane99

I think it's totally different when you're living with someone that you have a functional relationship with. I obviously don't know the back-story to your marriage, but I lived alone for a while, with roommates, then with exH and then alone again and now with FI.

My ex and I had very separate lives when we lived together, it was difficult when we were home at the same time and I don't remember a time when I looked forward to seeing him at the end of the day. Towards the end of our marriage I completely did my own thing without thought or regard to his plans and he did the same.

I thought moving in with FI would be a big transition but it was by far the smoothest adjustment to a living situation I've had! We have good communication, respect for each other, love spending time together and even though we have different standards of cleanliness we sort of both fell into roles that work for us after a few months and pick up the slack when we're needed. I think you'll be pleasantly surprised.

SueR13

Thanks Sloane. I guess before I started overthinking this, that's what I thought!

I retired 3 weeks ago, and FI is retiring in 3 weeks. I think the adjustment to living together would be easier if we were melding our two independent lives. But now we need to come up with a new day-to-day reality as well as get used to living with someone.