Second Weddings

bummer.... (vent)

Hey y'all, I haven't been on here in a while.

DH and I are renewing our vows for our 5th anniversary. We are a military couple who had to skip the big tahdo because of mission requirements. 5 years and 3 babies later we are throing the big party.

My MIL just wrote me yesturday to say my FIL will not be attending. Said he thinks its a big waste of money and wants to stay home. She is however going to be here and is very excited.

1.) our money - no one else is spending a dime (not including their travel money)
2.) if we'd done this 5 years ago NO ONE would have complained about a "wedding"
3.) He wants ME to tell DH that he isn'tcoming. NOT gonna happen. You aren't coming YOU tell your son.
4.) vent over. LOL.

Happy planning ladies -- oh just wanted to add - I love that THIS board can allow VR brides to talk about things like this. I stear clear of the 1st timer brides whew... the claws come out!

Re: bummer.... (vent)

  • jeannigirljeannigirl member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    LOL I hear you girl. Well I say have a great party. I'll come 

  • padookie42padookie42 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    That really sucks. :( Why is your FIL acting that way? I am so sorry you are going through this. You are right to not tell your DH. Let FIL tell him!

    Are you doing a ceremony and reception or just a reception or party?
  • edited December 2011
    Have fun planning it will be fun! Sorry FIL is gonna be a pain in your you know what!
  • edited December 2011
    We are renewing our vows with a "formal" ceremony followed by a dinner dance reception.

    FIL called today and talked to B. He better explained WHY he isn't coming. Said it isn't about us spending the money, but they don't have the $$ to have everyone come out -- and since it isn't our "real" wedding he hoped we'd understand.

    Once he put it out there like that it was much easier to take the news.

    Thanks for being so understanding.
  • edited December 2011
    Sorry to hear about that, but it looks like it all worked out, sort of.

    I understand that it is important to have special and close friends and relatives with you, but we took a slightly different view to get us through all this. We did not expect anyone to come. We made it as easy as possible for as many as possible, and told everyone (including my mother who said she couldn't travel that far), we would love to have them, but understand if you can't, won't, decide not to, etc.

    In the end, it is about the two of you, and yes you want to share your day with these people, but you could drive yourself nuts, and we thought the real focus was on us and our day together, doing it the way we wanted to. 

    In the end, we had some people that we were sure would come back out, because of illness, didn't want to travel, didn't think it was worth it, had other plans, work, etc. And there were some we were sure could not (because of financial or home situations) or would not come, and they made it.
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