Earn cash as you plan. Get a $20 gift card for every 200 points with The Knot Rewards
Moms and Maids
adlerml24
member
Very Pregnant Bridesmaid??
I am getting married in June and just found out one of my bridesmaids is pregnant. She is due about 3 weeks after my wedding. I don't know what to do. She has not bought a dress yet, but I need to make a decision in the next couple weeks about what to do. She is a childhood friend and one of my closest friends. I am devastated that I am even considering to ask her to NOT be in the wedding party anymore. I just feel like there are so many what ifs when having a 9 month pregnant bridesmaid. If I decide to ask her to bow out as a bridesmaid, I am going to ask if she would do a reading at the ceremony instead. I know it is not the same, but I am nervous about leaving things as is. She has not mentioned stepping down as bridesmaid, but she is also the type of person who will discretely make things about her which adds to my concern for my wedding day. I need some advice. What would you do?
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Very Pregnant Bridesmaid??
Let her make that choice.
[QUOTE]I am getting married in June and just found out one of my bridesmaids is pregnant. She is due about 3 weeks after my wedding. I don't know what to do. She has not bought a dress yet, but I need to make a decision in the next couple weeks about what to do. She is a childhood friend and one of my closest friends. I am devastated that I am even considering to ask her to NOT be in the wedding party anymore. I just feel like there are so many what ifs when having a 9 month pregnant bridesmaid. If I decide to ask her to bow out as a bridesmaid, I am going to ask if she would do a reading at the ceremony instead. I know it is not the same, but I am nervous about leaving things as is. She has not mentioned stepping down as bridesmaid, but she is also the type of person who will discretely make things about her which adds to my concern for my wedding day. I need some advice. What would you do?
Posted by adlerml24[/QUOTE]
You're not going to hear that it's okay to kick her out no matter how many boards you post it to.
"Popular on the internetz..."
Canada is kind of like a whole other world with new things to discover that us americans only dream of. - Narwhal
Paige I would like to profess my love for you and your brilliant mind. - breezerb
Murried Bio
The answer though is that you cannot kick her out.
I guess I never considered this as a problem. They're my best friends and I'm exstatic for them :-) I feel like having pregnant bridesmaids are good omens for my future fertility, if you will. Pregnant ladies are beautiful. I will also look amazingly thin next to them ;-) hahhaa.
Why not try and be happy for her? I hate to break it to you, but a lot of stuff will go "wrong" with your wedding planning. There's no use worrying about things. She may or may not go into labor right around your wedding (but what are chances of it happening AT your wedding?.....very slim.) but I would worry about that when the time comes. You guys are best friends? Well....act like it.
As far as the dress goes, a lot of dress shops have special deals with pregnant bridesmaids. At David's Bridal they tell the girl to find the dress she likes, but wait about 2 to 1 1/2 months before the wedding to order it, and then order a size up. They will rush deliver it for free. How cool is that? Very accomodating, so don't worry about the dress!!
Be happy for your friend!! She's having a baby!!! That doesn't make anyone less excited about you either, so it'll be ok
This is a belated married bio, with no reviews yet because I'm lazy.
Sometimes I feel like people think that brides are delicate little flower princesses who get all dressed up and pretty for one special moment of their dreams, when really they're just normal people who just happen to be getting married. Things shouldn't have to be sugar-coated for grown-ass women. -mstar284
You should take a minute to think about this and put it in perspective. Then dig deep down and be happy for your friend. Whatever you do, don't express any of those bridezilla thoughts about the pregnant bm stealing attention from you.
For you to ask if you can "kick out a bridesmaid" as you posted as your subject line on another board shows your lack of consideration for a friend. A true friend would talk to their pregnant BM and decide, together, what friend wants to do. By asking her to do a reading instead of being a BM only shows your shallowness and lack of over all thoughtfulness for your friend since you said you want to "kick her out!". Your wedding is not the end all event of the year and will probably be a big disappointment if you continue with this attitude. I hope you think long and hard about your true feelings (kick out is very harsh!) before you talk to your friend because it appears you have conflicting thoughts and trouble in the area of communication.
[QUOTE]I am getting married in June and just found out one of my bridesmaids is pregnant. She is due about 3 weeks after my wedding. I don't know what to do. She has not bought a dress yet, but I need to make a decision in the next couple weeks about what to do. She is a childhood friend and one of my closest friends. <strong> I am devastated that I am even considering to ask her to NOT be in the wedding party anymore</strong>. I just feel like there are so many what ifs when having a 9 month pregnant bridesmaid. If I decide to ask her to bow out as a bridesmaid, I am going to ask if she would do a reading at the ceremony instead. I know it is not the same, but I am nervous about leaving things as is. She has not mentioned stepping down as bridesmaid, but she is also the type of person who will discretely make things about her which adds to my concern for my wedding day. I need some advice. What would you do?
Posted by adlerml24[/QUOTE]
There's your answer. Leave it up to her. Accomodate her. If she can't stand during the ceremony, let her sit. She can step down if she needs to, but don't kick her out.
How would you feel if you were kicked out of a bridal party because of your pregnancy, which is one of the biggest blessings in her life. Do you really want to make her feel guilty for having a baby when it isn't convenient for you?