So my FI and I have been dating for 6.5 years and are getting married next June. My FI's brother met and married his now wife in 1 year, for most of that year they didn't live together. It was really fast! They literally planned their wedding in 2 months! They got married last October. My FI immediately accepted her as part of the family. And I really want to like her, but she annoys the crap out of me. I feel like she's very insincere, she laughs startlingly loud. She's into yoga and she emailed me this (IMO) inappropriate youtube video about how to have better sex using yoga. I feel like I don't know her very well and so I think it's weird and presumptuous of her to send me stuff like that.
But the minute I bring up her name my FI automatically assumes I'm critisizing and takes her side. He hadn't even read her email. In this case I suppose I was critisizing, but it's like he doesn't even hear me before he gets upset that I'm saying anything negative about her. I know it's important to him that I try to get along with her and I don't even think she knows that I don't like her, we don't argue or anything. I just try not to be around her. We live across the country from each other so it's not like we see each other all the time. But I'm not outward with my annoyance when I'm around her; I'm not rude obviously. I really do want to get past it and stop being annoyed by her. It's silly. I've never felt this way about anyone, I generally get along with everyone.
It's just one of those things that when we talk about it we always end up arguing and maybe it's naive of me, but I'd like us to not have unresolved issues before we get married. Should we do a session of counciling before we get married? Is it serious enough for that? I feel weird even suggesting that over something seemingly trivial like this... anyone else do couples counciling and have a positive experience? I feel like I can manage the FSIL situation, but it really bothers me how my FI reacts.
Your advice please, sorry this is so long! And I guess it's not really a moms and maids issue, but there's no "family" topic so I hope it's OK that I posted here!