Mandatory cocktail hour??

kristinnowak

I am having a large, but casual wedding on the lake that friends of the family own.  And we are then having the reception in a tent at the local country club.  We are planning for a 4pm ceremony and a 6pm dinner.  A majority of the guests are from out of town, but as everything is taking place within 5 miles of the other and the hotel is on site at the reception location, I am wondering if we have to have a cocktail hour - I know its the proper thing to do, especially with the out of town guests, but I know most of my family will just hang out at the lake and chitchat after the ceremony and not need any special to-do to keep them occupied for the 1.5 hours between end of ceremony and dinner. 

My other issue is that the cocktail hour would have to take place outside the tent as there is no other space to do it (except inside the tent which will be set up for the reception) which is fine if the weather cooperates, but not if it doesn't.

Do you think I should still do the cocktail hour??

aerinpegadrak

You need to host your guests from the time they first arrive at the ceremony until they leave the reception.  So if you have a gap, yes, you need to host something for them the entire time.  Presumably there are more guests at the wedding than just your family.

redheadfsu

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_customs-traditions_mandatory-cocktail-hour?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:36Discussion:2530dfce-3e92-40e3-b36d-778a0859cffaPost:a8dccfd7-2986-45d8-ade3-18d0cf895194">Mandatory cocktail hour??</a>:
[QUOTE]I am having a large, but casual wedding on the lake that friends of the family own.  And we are then having the reception in a tent at the local country club.  We are planning for a 4pm ceremony and a 6pm dinner.  A majority of the guests are from out of town, but as everything is taking place within 5 miles of the other and the hotel is on site at the reception location, <strong><u>I am wondering if we have to have a cocktail hour - I know its the proper thing to do</u></strong>, especially with the out of town guests, but I know most of my family will just hang out at the lake and chitchat after the ceremony and not need any special to-do to keep them occupied for the 1.5 hours between end of ceremony and dinner.  My other issue is that the cocktail hour would have to take place outside the tent as there is no other space to do it (except inside the tent which will be set up for the reception) which is fine if the weather cooperates, but not if it doesn't. Do you think I should still do the cocktail hour??
Posted by kristinnowak[/QUOTE]

Yes, you should have a cocktail hour in this situation. You really should provide something for your guests. Gaps are usually rude. If you know it is the proper thing to do, then why are you asking?

[Deleted User]

Ditto pp's. You need to have drinks and light refreshments/ hor'dourves for your guests during that gap. What are they going to do in the meantime? They are going to get bored and may even leave and not wait around.

Lisa50

Yes, a cocktail hour would be appropriate.  It would be best to have it at the same location as the reception, so you're not getting guests liquored up to then immediately drive.  OR ... have the cocktail hour at the ceremony site and provide transportation  to the reception site.

TurtlesAllTheWayDown

I would sure as hell NOT want to stand around talking without a drink or snack for 1.5 hours. Even if some of your family members do, I bet there are friends who won't know many people and therefore won't need all that time to catch up. Those people will want to go to cocktail hour. You should have that start right after the ceremony. You can do it in the same room as the reception. Just have everything set up. People can go find their seats and get a drink. You can have appetizers set up in a station or have passed apps. It's up to you.

MyNameIsNot

If you think people will want to hang out at the lake, why not serve refreshments at the lake and call that cocktail hour?  

You don't have to make a huge production out of it, but you do need to give your guests somewhere to go and serve them something while they are there.