Customs and Traditions

Groom's father as the best man - trashy?

Does it look dumb/trashy to have the Groom's father as his best man?  Was looking for Etiquette.

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Re: Groom's father as the best man - trashy?

  • The BM can be whomever the groom chooses. It isn't trashy at all to give his father that honor. :)
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  • not at all!  i think it is the opposite in fact, really touching and sweet.  

    my FIs best man had to drop out of our wedding for personal reasons.  we decided to ask his dad to be the best man.  they are really close and do a lot together.  his dad was so honored!  

    if the FI and his dad are close, i think it is a perfect choice!
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  • I've been to a lot of weddings that are doing this. It's a lot more common now.
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  • I can't figure out why anyone would think that was trashy.
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  • I think having the groom's father as the best man is extremely odd. Doesn't the groom have a good friend that can be the best man?
  • In Response to Re: Groom's father as the best man - trashy?:
    I can't figure out why anyone would think that was trashy.
    Posted by mysticl

    This. It's actually a very popular tradtion in some parts of the south.
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  • Not trashy at all. I have seen it more and more these days.
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  • Why in the world would it be trashy?
    "Trix, it's what they/our parents wanted. Why so judgemental? And why is your wedding date over a year and a half ago? And why do you not have a groom's name? And why have you posted over 12,000 posts? And why do you always say mean things to brides?" palegirl146
  • In Response to Re: Groom's father as the best man - trashy?:
    I can't figure out why anyone would think that was trashy.
    Posted by mysticl
    ITA.
  • I've been to two weddings where the groom's father was the BM, and they were both really beautiful. As much fun as it is to see the groom's face when the bride walks down the aisle, it's really touching to see the pride on his dad's face when he's watching his son watch his bride. I say go for it!
  • It's pretty common for the groom's dad to be his BM.
  • Umm, what's your definition of "trashy" that this would qualify?  I'm quite curious.
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  • I don't know why that would be "trashy" ...  it might be "unconventional" in some places maybe, but "trashy"? Really?

    Anyway, the groom can choose whomever he wants to be his best man/woman ... just like the bride gets to choose whomever she wants for her maid/matron/man of honor.

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  • Have you ever heard of a bride choosing her mother as MOH? That screams friendless person.
  • My FI is having his Grandpa as his best man and I love it!
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  • kbrampkbramp
    First Comment
    member
    I was about to say the same thing! It's definitely a Southern tradition...my FFIL will be my fiancee's best man. This actually helped avoid some conflict--he has two friends who were certain they'd be the best man and using his dad smoothed all of that right out.
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  • I can think of quite a few things that would look trashy at a wedding.  This isn't one of them.

    What in the world do you think defines trashy??
  • Not only is our Best Man my FI's dad, but he has 2 Best Men.  He had trouble picking one and I suggested having two, he loved idea.  Our programs read Maid of Honor & Matron of honor and Best Men.  Sometimes its hard to choose any one person.
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  • There is nothing trashy about that.  I've seen it done at several weddings, and I think it is really sweet!
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  • Not at all...my best friend's fiance had his dad as his best man.  It's an honor
  • I hope it is not......we too are having the grooms father as the best man!!
  • Not sure why this would be trashy, it's more like an honor.
  • I concur with everyone, and also wonder why this could ever be considered trashy.  It is also an excellent way to avoid any hard feelings if the groom has several very close friends but no brother.
  • NO WAY!  My grandfather was best man for my dad!  If the best man in your husband's life is his dad then that is awesome!!
  • I think that is so great if your fiance wants to do that! I wouldn't stop him due to "etiquette."
  • We are getting married August 14th and my FFIL is the BM.  He is truely my Fiance's best friend.  I think it is wonderful.
  • I've only been to a couple of weddings in which the groom's father was not the best man.  My fiance's father is older, and I know that it is especially meaningful for him to be able to have his father as his best man.  I think it is a sweet tradition and have no idea why anyone would consider it trashy!
  • I sure hope not. I think my FI plans on asking my grandfather to be a GM (or maybe the BM - it depends on how his brother would feel about it I guess).
  • The only way this could even be considered trashy would be if your FFIL was wearing a dirty, stained white T-shirt with several nasty holes in it, cut offs and a trucker hat for the ceremony! 

    Otherwise, what everyone else said!
  • cam18cam18
    First Comment
    member
    edited July 2010
    Certainly not trashy at all!! My brother (who is actually my step brother from my Dad's previous marriage, but he's 15 years older than me, so I've always just thought of him as my brother) was actually the best man in my mom and dad's wedding (he was 6 at the time). Then when my brother got married about 4 years ago, my dad was his best man. It wasn't a big deal at all! I think it's actually cute and shows that they have a good relationship.

    It would be one thing to have your mom as your made of honor, b/c every mom wants to just be a "mother of the bride" at some point, but I don't think for the groom's dad it's nearly as big a deal. So no worries! :)
    CAM Vetter
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