Wedding Customs & Traditions Forum

bridal shower

hello, i am very new to this, so bear with me. My MOH just picked the date of the shower, (which is saturday the 3rd of sept) labor day weekend, I have alot of out of town guests and 3 of my BM's work weekends, she did not check with anyone. I personally do not think a holiday weekend is a good idea, Also the food she is picking out is because there is no work involved, cold cuts, I really want shower food, sloppy joe's, salads, etc. I do not want to seem ungrateful or appear to be a bridezilla, I told her I will help her with whatever she needs and so did the BM's. is it ok to tell he what I would like/think. help me

Re: bridal shower

  • She is hosting. Yes, she should have run the date by you. But, you can't tell her to change it. The food or anything else related to planning the shower is not your choice it is hers as she is the host & is paying for it.

    Sorry, but you can either smile & say, "thanks" or decline the shower. If you tell her to do if differently, then you are planning your own shower which is rude (and ungrateful) of you.

    Planning Bio
    Married 9/15/11

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    *This is Not Legal Advice*
  • thank you for your input, it is appreciated. even if was not what I wanted to hear, lol
  • I agree she should have run the date by you, but think of it this way- you're getting a free party in your honor.  Show up, smile and be gracious.  In your head you can think of what you'll do different when it's your turn to throw a shower.  ;)  

    If any guests or BMs complain, just say I'm sorry but I wasn't involved in the planning. 
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  • I agree that she really should have run the date by you.  It doesn't really make sense not to.

    But the food, that's a different story.  She's hosting, and she gets to decide what kind of party she'll throw.

    BTW, where do you get that sloppy joes and salads are shower food?  There is no set type of shower food, but the majority just have finger foods, like cold cuts and veggie trays.  I can't imagine eating a sloppy joe at a shower!
  • It's still 4+ months away... you could always say you're busy that weekend (it being a holiday weekend is a good excuse to say you're doing something with family or whatever)

    You said 3 of your BMs work weekends? Soooo why would labor day weekend matter? All bridal showers I've ever heard of or been to have been on the weekend (sure, they don't NEED to be) but if she schedules a weekend gig that means those 3 can't come regardless of whether or not it's a holiday weekend. (Plus, if it' 4+ months away.. they could get work off possibly...) Just sayin'...
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  • my Bm's are nurses and work every other weekend, I did mention that the one was definately working, and they are all in this together, so the moh isn't footing the bill all by herself. she did change the date to the following weekend. as far as the food I guess it is a culture/regional thing. Every shower I have been to has had those types of food, guess it depends where you are from. I told her about the date and told her I did not want to know anything else, that way I can not meddle. and will not stress about it. But thank you everyone for your imput. I did take it to heart
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