Favorite/Least Favorite Wedding Customs

rekrjs21

Favorite: the first look and the first kiss
Least favorite: the unity candle- I just don't see the point, why have something that unites a couple for the rest of thier lives that will burn out in only a few hours?

thnksnow13

I just asked my maids if they think cutting the disgusting garter toss will make the bouquet toss seem lopsided?  what do you think?

mej-211

All of this discussion goes to show that bridal "customs" are local and mean totally different things depending on where you live.  I subscribe to NONE OF THEM.  Brides: Be yourself and let the superstitious and close-minded people aggravate themselves!

It is YOUR day.

meangreengurl04

I love pretty much all the wedding-day traditions!! Except the cake smashing...it's rude to mess up a woman's make-up on her wedding day!

MOST: when the bride walks down the aisle, and everyone turns to look at her.

AJADIONNE

LEAST FAVE:
GARTER/BOUQUET TOSS, LONG CEREMONIES, NO MICROPHONES AT THE CEREMONIES, WEDDINGS THAT START MORE THAN AN HOUR LATE, EXCESSIVE LINE DANCING, DRUNK BRIDE (NOT SEXY)

MOST FAVE:
BRIDE AND GROOMS FIRST LOOK AT EACHOTHER, VOWS, KISS, FUNNY TOASTS, OLD PPL AND KIDS DANCING, A NICE SEND OFF

lclaffey

Least: embarrassing the garter and bouquet catchers, wedding party members being forced to give a speech who clearly don't want to speak in public.

My sister made me give a toast at her wedding.  Public speaking terrifies me, she knew it, & couldn't care less.

lclaffey

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_customs-traditions_favoriteleast-favorite-wedding-customs?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:36Discussion:fce2efe5-ccff-445a-9da7-e43e8acff225Post:66dcfaa2-c2c5-4d32-823b-40a0cbbf95f1">Re: Favorite/Least Favorite Wedding Customs</a>:
[QUOTE]Most: Father/daughter dance, clinking glasses to kiss. Least: Garter toss- we hate it so much we decided to cut it. Woo! The one we can't cut is the first dance. Boo.
Posted by kaitlyn142[/QUOTE]

My fiance would like to cut this out, too...

[Deleted User]

I have been to weddings where the kids wander around aimlessly, throw hissy fits, won't walk to the altar, etc.  I'm so glad that my FI's niece and nephew (who are going to be Flower Girl and Ring Bearer) will both be 8 at the time of the wedding, and will act appropriately! 

boerejulia

Least: embarassing family members and long ceremonys
Most: The first time the groom sees the bride and cake

Katrina1016

I agree about the money dance...It seems a little silly. My cousin recently got married and she didn't want to do it either, but their DJ said it can be a great way to talk to guests without being interupted by others. Just a thought!

missmayI

My least favorite tradition probably has to be decorating the get away car.  It's just annoying and a pain to clean. 

My favorite traditions is probably the dances with my hubby and father, I am also a big fan of the bouquet and garter throwing oh and I can't wait to be announced Mr. and Mrs. Pacheco.  I pretty much like it all though.

ChristineJene

I have actually always liked the gap between wedding/reception. It gives me a chance to freshen up/take a nap/explore a little if the wedding is out of town, etc.

Least favorite: long toasts, too many spotlight dances, waiting in line for anything, the wedding party being LATE. (I mean come one, if you are having a gap of several hours between the ceremony and reception get it together and be on time. People are hungry.) I was at a wedding once where the WP was over an hour late, by the time they got there everyone was starving and DRUNK because they waited so long at the cocktail hour. 

Most favorite: I like smashing cake, nice (short) toasts, unity candle, welcome baskets for out-of-town guests

Kyndalle

Least: Catholic weddings in the afternoon.  garter/bouquet toss (not doing at mine)

favorite: first dance, dancing in general, rehearsal dinner, cake

yebba

I have been told by my mother that virgin brides where white, non-virgin brides wear off white and if you have children before marriage than you are not allowed to wear a veil.  Note: She doesn't actually believe in these customs (nor do I) They have only been passed down

NicoleC62

FAVORITE
-Father walking the bride down the aisle and giving her away – I can’t believe no one has mentioned this! I know I will be holding back tears the entire walk and not just because I’m marrying my best friend, but because my dad who has been my hero, my champion, and the leading man most of my life will be graciously relinquishing his role to another. It will be bittersweet.
-Traditional Vows – While I do love a bride and groom who either find or write interesting vows, I think there is something powerful about saying the same words that so many others have said before you. 
-First Kiss - for obvious reasons!

LEAST FAVORITE
-Garter and Bouquet Toss - I want to cut this because I think it's tacky and we are having a small wedding. The 4-5 single guests will feel "singled out," but people are pressuring me to keep it.
-Smashing the cake in each other's faces - I always wonder what kind of issues the bride and groom have or will have in the future.
- Open Bars/Lots of Alcohol - While this isn't really a true tradition/custom, many people treat it that way. Free alcohol, or even the presence of alcohol, shouldn't be expected especially if the wedding budget is tight or the couple doesn't drink. While our venue allows us to bring our own alcohol, we are having an early afternoon wedding and having limited alcohol because my fiancé doesn't really drink and I don't want a bunch of drunkenness at the wedding.

bridey870

From what I've heard white has nothing to do with virginity. Queen Victoria wore white when she got married in 1840, and set the trend because of course everyone wanted to be like the queen! She wore white, not because she was a virgin (though of course she surely must have been, being proper and royalty and all!) but because apparently she had some special lace she wanted to incorporate into her wedding attire. Before that, and even for quite awhile after until the trend spread through Europe and the United States, women simply wore their best dress or had a new dress made that they could continue to wear after the wedding. This could be as simple as a brown wool dress in the mid 1800s.

As for veils, it's not as clear. In Italy the custom originated as the veil being a barrier to ward off evil spirit's on the woman's wedding day. Others say it has to do with virginity. And there are many other explanations too. But I say, who cares? If you think veils are pretty, then wear one. If you don't like them, then don't wear one.

heatherb84

I am getting married in a Catholic Church and we are not allowed to have the Unity Candle or Sand Ceremony - as the Priest says it does not have any religious meaning or represent the sacrament of marriage - it is merrily symbolic.

Favourites: Pictures, Seeing my FI for the first time; Dance with my Dad; Good Food & Music

Least: Cake Smashing; Money Dance

I have been ridiculed because I am marrying an Italian and it is tradition - well this is one tradition I am breaking!

Also, for everyone that doesn't like the bouquet toss - we are having a couples dance instead - and the longest married couple will receive my bouqet.

weisscv

LEAST: As a former (current??) cellist, I absolutely HATE Pachebel's Canon.  Most brides choose to have their bridesmaids walk down the aisle to this song, but I've played it at so many weddings that I have grown to hate it!  Also, as far as classical music goes, it is just not my favorite.  If you are having a quartet playing at the ceremony, you might want to try asking them what they like to play - you might like those pieces, too!

MOST: For Jewish weddings, the smashing of the glass by the groom is my fave, but I am also really excited for the dancing with family friends (and yes, no chicken dance, YMCA, etc.)

cher_ptp

While this isn't a "custom", my least favorite part about a wedding is everyone telling you what should or shouldn't/ can or can't be done.  It's YOUR day, not anyone else's.  Do what you fell will make your day special.

What I like most about a wedding is EVERYTHING!!  My favorite tradition is "something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue".  It was very important to me to have these items, and as a result both my mom and grandmother will be with me as I walk down the aisle!

As a side note:  I'm also interested to know why so many of you don't like the bouquet toss.  The person who catches the bouquet is supposedly the next in line to get married. I just think it's a fun tradition!

reason00

Hahahahaha...you people hate so much about a wedding...just elope and go to a club.

I love it all. I enjoy every moment of weddings, especially now that I know the extensive work the couple (mostly bride) have done to make their wedding beautiful.

And I'm with the girl on the garter/bouquet toss! I love them! I think they're fun!

reason00

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_customs-traditions_favoriteleast-favorite-wedding-customs?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:36Discussion:fce2efe5-ccff-445a-9da7-e43e8acff225Post:3da7b708-11c3-4ee2-bd1b-a19c761b91a2">Re: Favorite/Least Favorite Wedding Customs</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Favorite/Least Favorite Wedding Customs : Not criticizing you disliking them, just answering your question.  A) It's the merging of two FLAMES into one that is the symbol, not the physical wax and wick.  That's why it's still my favorite.  The sand ceremony makes pretty colors and can be really cool, but the two colors of sand are still their own distinct colors. B) We plan to light our center candle on our anniversary every year and eat dinner by it's light.  We did it for our 1 yr anniversary and it was so amazing.
Posted by StageManager14[/QUOTE]



This is actually a really nice tradition you've started.

I think I'm going to go with the wine cup ceremony, modified. Have my mom and his mom each bring a bottle of wine and pour it into one glass and we'll drink from it. Similar to unity, a blending of families, all that lovey stuff etc.

reason00

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_customs-traditions_favoriteleast-favorite-wedding-customs?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:36Discussion:fce2efe5-ccff-445a-9da7-e43e8acff225Post:5207a359-8cf9-4366-922c-8051f5c0a5f3">Re: Favorite/Least Favorite Wedding Customs</a>:
[QUOTE]I have been to weddings where the kids wander around aimlessly, throw hissy fits, won't walk to the altar, etc.  I'm so glad that my FI's niece and nephew (who are going to be Flower Girl and Ring Bearer) will both be 8 at the time of the wedding, and will act appropriately! 
Posted by mrspebbles2011[/QUOTE]


Kids running around are acting appropriately.  They're kids!

I love kids and welcome them to my wedding.

DanielleZZ

I am also wondering why pp hate the unity candle and the tosses.  When I've been to weddings as a guest the bouquet toss was always one of my favorite parts!

DoeOfTheWood

Am I weird because I actually like the garter/bouquet toss? A lot of people seem to not like them :-(

LindsayC21

I am having a destination wedding and thus avoiding ALL of the traditions that I dislike, since it will be a small and intimate affair.

Dislikes:
1. garter/bouquet toss -- seems like you always have to twist people's arms to get on the dance floor for these - why bother?
2. Dollar dance -- ridiculously tacky, ugh.
3. cake smashing -- um, your wedding reception is not the time or place for a food fight. Class it up, people.
4. Speeches by drunk members of the wedding party, especially when they have nothing to do with blessing/wishing luck to the happy couple

Likes:
1. The first look
2. The first kiss
3. The father/daughter dance
4. When the groom cries during his vows --- oh god, it gets me every time.

lizzybit1975

It's rare these days that I would think any bride a virgin!  Wear what you want ladies!

alkerjlw

Favorite: pretty dresses, first dresses, enough drinks to have fun but not get really drunk. 

Least: Unity candle/sand ceremony, 10 speeches (MOH and BM are fine but anything more...ugh), cake smashing in the face, boquet catcher has to dance with garter catcher.

munsterchick

Least -- garter toss, bouquet toss, long boring speeches ( we will be placing limits on who will be talking and for how long and in case you say I'm being controlling our parents and the bridal party wanted this too, we're also going to make it interesting by placing betting tabs on the tables .)  
 the day being over too soon....

Most -- first sight of bride walking down the aisle, the look on the grooms face, first kiss, father of bride speech (yes I know speeches were also in my least but the FoB speech is special) being surrounded by family and friends.

I won't be worrying too much about whether I wear white, ivory, colours or a veil over my face ..or not if thats what I decide to do.... its no-one elses business but mine and my fiances.......

asialee2

Least Fave: Garter Toss and Bouquet toss. its archaic for women to to scramble in hopes to be the next one to get married. As excited as I am about it, a wedding isnt the be all and end all of life. 

Most Fave: exchanging vows and rings, becoming hubby and wife

rlg510

Favorite: 
Getting Beautiful invitations in the mail,
Seeing the couple very happy,
Ceremony Program to follow along with the ceremony and know who's who in the wedding party.

Least Favorite:  Practically everything I've read in this thread so far.  I'm not going to do any of those things I hate including:  not having a flower girl or ring bearer, not having a garter toss or bouquet toss, no unity candle, etc.

Most of the symbolism about white dresses, veils, and virginity, etc. is over.  I recently read an article that white dresses are becomming less comon anymore while brides express themselves and wear what they feel is most flattering on them.