Favorite/Least Favorite Wedding Customs

blisphording

My fiance and I don't like the garter toss either, so what we've decided to do is have the anniversary dance instead (where married couples dance on the floor and then are called off based on how many years they've been married). At the end, I am going to give my bouquet to the couple who is left on the floor (the ones who've been together the longest). We feel like it is a nice way to give away the bouquet without the tackiness of the garter toss.

SamStover

LIKES
-Groom seeing bride for the first time
-Keeping my wedding march song a secret (!stupidly excited about the song)
-Father Daughter dance
-Dances/dancing
-Open bar
-Garter toss (maybe only some young people like them idk)
-Sand ceremony
-Photo booth for guests to put in a photo book with a note
-Personalized guest book
-Becoming Mr. & Mrs.
-Heartfelt speeches that make me cry
-Clinking the glasses to kiss
-Signature wedding drink
-Planning
-Vases for BM's bouquets
-Unique favors for guests
-The dress that makes the bride feel like a million $$
-Making it classy but still fun (that will be a challenge)
-Personalizing your wedding day to be want you want it to be

DISLIKES:
-Stupid dances, I've never even heard of the money dance wtf is that
-Children at weddings, there will be none at mine
-Having to walk slow down the aisle
-Tacky wedding marches
-Ugly Bridesmaid dresses
-Cake smashing, but why do people think this is a tradition? I think it's just a weird  thing that happened and caught on, or people being silly.
-Catholic weddings
-Making people do anything
-Decorating get away car, Yeah don't think I like that.
-Large bridal parties, I want mine under 5 a piece.
-Huge centerpieces that block your view
-Old champagne (that was clearly poured 2-3 hours ago, gross)
-Champagne toast, toast what you like!
-Tossing MY bouquet, if we do this, there will be a mini similar to mine
-People telling you what you can or can't do, it's your day.

I think I've said enough, 

[Deleted User]

Least: Garter and Bouquet toss and cake cutting

Can't wait till I don't have to do the bouquet toss to find out if I will be the first to marry or not.. I already know I'm getting married and don't want to be hounded by the bridal party to go catch the bouquet

Favorite: personalized vows, rose ceremony, the something blue, new, old and borrowed and first dance

My family is very excited about the borrowed part.. my grandparents are arguing by whose pearls I'm going to wear

smeifer

I think the white/ivory debate is another thing that varies region to region.  I have always been told that wearing white signfies purity.  What it means to be pure is up for debate, whether it be virginity or first marriage.  I personally think you should wear what is most flattering and let them talk if they so desire. 

I have always been told that a veil is worn over your face so that the first time the groom sees you will be the moment you are going to marry him.  It goes back to the tradition that it's bad luck to see your groom on the wedding day before you're married.  Again...I think you should do what makes you happy!

Least:  bouquet toss, smashing cake, matchy-matchy MOB dresses
Favorite:  vows, first kisses, flowers, big dresses

virgincita

Wow! What a variety of opinions! I have enjoyed reading all of these :-)

LIKES:
- Wearing white!! My FI and I are "waiting" to be married and he was very intent on me wearing the "brighted white I can find" and I love it. (but I don't think there is a problem with non-virgins wearing white either....you should wear what you want!)
 

- My veil. Just a simple drop veil that is cut extra wide so that it billows out behind me on the ground like Maria in the Sound of Music. My grandma made it and I can't wait to wear it.

- The Mass. I suppose I'm in the minority here, but it's really important to us. Most churches have 4:30 confessions and then the 5:30 Vigil Mass on Saturdays, which is why weddings have to be so early. Our reception will be from 4 to 9 pm, which I think is perfect! I'm not sure what the problem is for some people?

- The toasts. I can't wait to hear what my sister is going to say...I know I will cry.

- Taking his name :-) and starting a new family.

- The boquet toss!! I've never heard anyone complain about this before I read these posts! Everyone I know loves this tradition...and I have always enjoyed it too. I caught the boquet at my best friends wedding in April and was engaged 4 weeks later (of course I knew it was coming...but still :-)

- The wedding night. Yup I said it :-) As you can imagine, the waiting has not been easy...at all....and it's going to be so special.


DISLIKES:
- Father walking the bride down the isle. I know this is very special to a lot of people, and if I had a good relationship with my father I'm sure I would want it. But I don't, and it doesn't make sense for him to walk me....but everyone will be expecting it and when they see me walking alone it might be a bit of shock to the family members who like to pretend "everythings ok". Uhg. I also didn't like the idea of my dad "giving me away". I'm not property.

- Parents dance....for the same reason :-\ I'm dancing with my bio. father and then my stepfather (who I am much closer to). I feel like I'm already making enough of a statement by not having him walk me down the isle...I felt wrong cutting out his dance too. It's so awkward.

- The Money Dance. I think there must be different versions of this. I've seen some where people pay to have a dance with the bride. The tradition in my FI's culture is for the bride to walk around and everyone stuffs money into her dress. YEA!! I know. Gross!! I said I would feel like a prostitute and absolutely refused. My FI and his family were perfectly ok with that.

- Unity/Sand ceremonies. Just reminds me of hippies and "new age"-y type of stuff...which I guess is what some people are going for, and thats cool if you want it. I just happen to find it tacky.

- Garter toss. Maybe I'm a hypocrite for having the boquet toss but not the garter....but I feel like throwing some flowers backwards is "fun", while the garter removal/toss is just "raunchy".



P.S. For the people who are having Catholic weddings but are complaining about not being able to do whatever you want. Why bother having a Catholic wedding? There are tons of non-denominational ministers or even non-religious celebrants who are great at officiating ceremonies and will allow and help you to incorporate your own vows or sand/unity candles...or anythying else you would like to do...and you can have it at any time of day. I've seen a lot of beautiful, non-religious weddings like this. So if you're unhappy then I encourage you to go in that direction. The Catholic Church sees marriage as a Sacrament and Sacraments are not "do it yourself".

jemmini6

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_customs-traditions_favoriteleast-favorite-wedding-customs?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:36Discussion:fce2efe5-ccff-445a-9da7-e43e8acff225Post:a26c8bbc-26ae-4fd3-b708-c24b96b3ecdb">Re: Favorite/Least Favorite Wedding Customs</a>:
[QUOTE]I agree about the money dance...It seems a little silly. My cousin recently got married and she didn't want to do it either, but their DJ said it can be a great way to talk to guests without being interupted by others. Just a thought! :)
Posted by Katrina1016[/QUOTE]

This is the point of the money dance in my circle.  People usually only give $1 - $5, so it's not about the money, it's just one-on-one time with the bride and groom.  I still don't want to do one (because I don't want to be forced to dance with men who are not my husband), but IMO when they are done that way it's not as tacky as a money grab where they stuff the bride and grooms clothes with $20's.

hhgg1225

My most favorite is the unity sand, being annouced as mr and mrs, smashing the cake, and line dances of all kinds

Least-people clinking on the glasses for the couple to kiss, super long ceremonies, head tables

lindenheart

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_customs-traditions_favoriteleast-favorite-wedding-customs?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:36Discussion:fce2efe5-ccff-445a-9da7-e43e8acff225Post:6d9124d6-8739-4f9b-b601-2e28cdf42e48">Re: Favorite/Least Favorite Wedding Customs</a>:
[QUOTE]LEAST FAVORITE:  The Money Dance...I've been begging and pleading with my fiance not to make me do it, but he insists.  I understand that it is a tradition in some cultures, but one I could do without. [/QUOTE]

FI wanted to do this too but I am also not a fan. We compromised and put a personal spin on it. Because FI and I already take dance lessons, we are going to have decorated boxes with types of dances that FI and I know how to do (swing, lindy hop, tango, waltz, etc).  Guests can throw their dollars into the box of the dance they would like to see us dance. FI is okay with this because the guests still get to participate, and I'm happy because we're only talking about one song, one dance. Some of those dollar dances take 5-10 songs before the line is finally over.

I've seen other versions of the money dance. Get creative and see if you can talk FI into a modified money dance.

Riss91

Hmm...I'm wondering why so many people dislike Catholic weddings? It seems odd to me to isolate one religion like that....

monkey&fats

Hi there!  In my first wedding I had both my dads walk me down the aisle.  I had 2 garters... one for each of them to put on and we split the father daughter dance down the middle.  Halfway thru my step dad (who raised me basically) stepped in and finished the dance!

monkey&fats

Love that idea about the couples dancing who have been together! 

DanielleZZ

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_customs-traditions_favoriteleast-favorite-wedding-customs?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:36Discussion:fce2efe5-ccff-445a-9da7-e43e8acff225Post:e493e752-7346-4175-a1ca-d9328d6bd4a6">Re: Favorite/Least Favorite Wedding Customs</a>:
[QUOTE]Hmm...I'm wondering why so many people dislike Catholic weddings? It seems odd to me to isolate one religion like that....
Posted by Riss91[QUOTE]

When I spoke about the Catholic ceremony being my least favorite part I was speaking solely about the fact that it has to start at 2pm and then my guest have nothing to do for a few hours until the reception.  I wasn't trying to isolate the one religion I am Catholic and was just speaking about my personal annoyance with the long break.  Although the ceremony is about an hour long with sitting and standing my problem is only with the time frame.

Just wanted to clarify what I meant, not sure if other people meant the same thing as me or not.

staceymhanson

Least: Dollar dance, clinking on the glases, and smashing cake into each others faces.

Most: father daughter dance, first dance, and vows...

I told my FI if he smashes the cake in my face he can plan on spending our wedding night at his mothers lol and the clinking on the glasses thing just annoys me i have sensative hearing and this sometimes make me have to leave the room for awhile!!