Junior Bridesmaid Dilema

Amanda051588

At the beginning of my wedding planning, I somewhat panicked in picking my bridesmaids without giving it as much thought as my fiance' did, who took at least a month to think things through. I wanted to incorporate my step sister as a bridesmaid and thought it would be great for her to be a part of it all. The only problem is that she's 15 years old and can't participate in a lot of the "activities" pre and post wedding. So I've considered her to be more of a junior bridesmaid. A couple of months in, I asked a 7th person to be a bridesmaid.. Her boyfriend will also be in our wedding party so I figured it'd be a great fit! The problem I'm running into now is that my fiance will only have 6 groomsmen and we can't necessarily afford an additional groomsman to walk another bridesmaid down the aisle. My question is, is it tacky to have a junior bridesmaid walk without an escort? I feel bad that she'll be standing alone and I'm sort of embarrassed to even call her a junior bridesmaid because I don't want to totally outcast her or make her feel unimportant.... Any encouragement is greatly appreciated!

artbyallie

1. Don't call her a junior bridesmaid. She's processing down the aisle with the rest of them, ergo she is a bridesmaid because none of them have to do anything other than that.

2. You don't have to have even sides, so just let that go.

lls31

I have 2 adult BMs and FI has 2 adult GM.  FI's 9 year old niece is also a BM and she will be walking alone.  

Girlie1030

You're overthinking it.  She is a full fledged bridesmaid regardless of whether or not she can go party with you all pre or post wedding.  Don't worry about uneven sides and if you don't want someone to walk alone, just have them walk single file and alternate boy/girl. 

MyNameIsNot

She is 15 years old!  Calling her a junior BM is going to make her feel like a child and left out.  Call her a regular bridesmaid and don't treat her like a child.

Sides do not need to be even.  That's just silly.

coopsbaby

My bridesmaids are 15 and 18, with a 20 year old "best dude". They are just as much bridesmaids even though none of them can drink. And all of ours are walking alone since they prefer it. No biggie.

Simply Fated

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_junior-bridesmaid-dilema?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:21c1e4d3-6644-49e7-a7bf-2766f417e570Post:b934c7b6-e364-4a6f-8e56-aa38613f9a66">Junior Bridesmaid Dilema</a>:
[QUOTE]At the beginning of my wedding planning, I somewhat panicked in picking my bridesmaids without giving it as much thought as my fiance' did, who took at least a month to think things through. I wanted to incorporate my step sister as a bridesmaid and thought it would be great for her to be a part of it all. The only problem is that she's 15 years old and can't participate in a lot of the "activities" pre and post wedding. So I've considered her to be more of a junior bridesmaid. A couple of months in, I asked a 7th person to be a bridesmaid.. Her boyfriend will also be in our wedding party so I figured it'd be a great fit! The problem I'm running into now is that my fiance will only have 6 groomsmen and we can't necessarily afford an additional groomsman to walk another bridesmaid down the aisle. My question is, is it tacky to have a junior bridesmaid walk without an escort? I feel bad that she'll be standing alone and I'm sort of embarrassed to even call her a junior bridesmaid because I don't want to totally outcast her or make her feel unimportant.... Any encouragement is greatly appreciated!
Posted by Amanda051588[/QUOTE]
If you don't like the term Junior Bridesmaid, then don't use it. You can just call her a bridesmaid and try to include her in as many activities as you can. It's really not a big deal. The term "junior" is used in my circle, but it's dropping in popularity and certainly not mandatory to use.

Have one or two of the groomsmen walk two girls down. This way she isn't being highlighted by having to walk down alone. Unless she wants to walk down alone lol.

bboone01

I am also having 2 junior bridesmaids and I am having them walk together so maybe you could find a second girl to walk with her so she doesn't feel alone? Otherwise I would just explain to her that it may not be appropriate to have her walk with an older man (however old the groomsmen are) and I don't think it'd be tacky to have her walk alone because pairing her with an older man may be more inappropriate or just plain awkward

Simply Fated

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_junior-bridesmaid-dilema?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:21c1e4d3-6644-49e7-a7bf-2766f417e570Post:4f0ac7b5-c4f9-4478-bc9d-cc25caafc843">Re: Junior Bridesmaid Dilema</a>:
[QUOTE]I am also having 2 junior bridesmaids and I am having them walk together so maybe you could find a second girl to walk with her so she doesn't feel alone? Otherwise I would just explain to her that it may not be appropriate to have her walk with an older man (however old the groomsmen are) and I don't think it'd be tacky to have her walk alone because pairing her with an older man may be more inappropriate or just plain awkward
Posted by bboone01[/QUOTE]
I wouldn't add someone to the bridal party just so she'll have someone to walk with.

missine162

I agree, call her a bridesmaid, that's like saying 'I only half picked you to be in our wedding'

just because she isn't going to be at the crazy events doesn't make her less important to you

Have a great time!

OliveOilsMom

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_junior-bridesmaid-dilema?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:21c1e4d3-6644-49e7-a7bf-2766f417e570Post:ddcc3b42-9e74-46ac-975e-9aaec946c679">Re: Junior Bridesmaid Dilema</a>:
[QUOTE]She is 15 years old!  <strong>Calling her a junior BM is going to make her feel like a child and left out</strong>.  Call her a regular bridesmaid and don't treat her like a child. Sides do not need to be even.  That's just silly.
Posted by MyNameIsNot[/QUOTE]

This!

Just because she is 15 doesn't mean she can't partake in the parties either.  My 9 year old niece was my jr BM, she came to the dinner portion of the b party (along with my mom & MIL).  All the ladies attending, knew she would be there, so she wouldn't see something potentially inappropriate.  When it was time to go out to the bar afterwards, she went home with my mom.  It made her feel apart of the party.

I also got her the same gifts as the BM, just modified slightly more to her 9 year old tastes.

And lastly, you don't need even sides.

Amanda051588

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_junior-bridesmaid-dilema?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:21c1e4d3-6644-49e7-a7bf-2766f417e570Post:4f0ac7b5-c4f9-4478-bc9d-cc25caafc843">Re: Junior Bridesmaid Dilema</a>:
[QUOTE]I am also having 2 junior bridesmaids and I am having them walk together so maybe you could find a second girl to walk with her so she doesn't feel alone? Otherwise I would just explain to her that it may not be appropriate to have her walk with an older man (however old the groomsmen are) and I don't think it'd be tacky to have her walk alone because pairing her with an older man may be more inappropriate or just plain awkward
Posted by bboone01[/QUOTE]

Thanks! That's a great way to look at it. I don't have a second person to add, but I think explaining to her the older man scenario is a great way to handle it.