Uninviting a Bridesmaid?!?

Erica411

      We first got engaged in December of 2008 and started planning a wedding right away. I asked several close friends to be bridesmaids thinking we would be married within a year.
      Well we ended up purchasing a home and he went back to school so our wedding was pushed back. No big deal, what's one more years?
      One of the girls I asked was a neighbor that I had gotten close to and considered a good friend. Now that we have moved, we don't see each other nearly as often as we live very separate lifestyles. She's a night owl, I have a 9-5. However, she seems to be spiraling out of control with her drinking and maybe even using? I still consider her a friend, but I would not consider us close at all anymore as I have distanced myself.
       Now I look back and really regret it. She's very very flakey, which is fine, but she certainly won't be helpful for the wedding as I don't feel like she is reliant in any way. Also, I cringe imagining her with my family, telling inappropriate stories and boozing it up at rehearsal dinners.
       I think I need to disinvite her, but still would like to invite her to the wedding! What do you think would be the best way to do this? She's super emo, and I am worried about her having a blowup.....  anyone been through this? Thanks in advance.

trix1223

Jenna, in my experience, (and everyone else I know), you'll look at the photos a lot for the first year, and then less the second, and less each subsequent year. 

As with everything else, life moves on, and as you have children, or vacations, or job, or whatever......your wedding becomes a wonderful memory, but do you pull out the pictures each week, each month and look at them?  Nope. 

I looked at our pictures for the first time in YEARS last summer when I was looking for a particular photo of my mom to display at her memorial service.

aerinpegadrak

I think you should have good wedding photos to be able to show your kids, grandkids, and other relatives.  We also wanted good pictures to be able to show everyone who didn't make it because the wedding was so small.  I don't foresee us pulling out the album all that often, but I still invested in a good photographer.

I also think that photos should be documenting what actually happened, rather than trying to set up posed photo ops that would look good.  Because if you do look at your photos in 20 years, you're not going to remember a spontaneous burst of affection as everyone blew bubbles at you, you're going to remember standing there waiting while someone passed out the bubbles and instructed everyone what to do.