IT'S MY DAY!

bablingbrooke

You don't have to consult everyone in the WP before making decisions. That's misreading the point.  You just have a duty to not be an inconsiderate person.  That means such things as:

-Not splitting up the WP from their SOs during the reception (especially for dinner).

-Consulting your WP for their budgets before picking out outfits.

-In general, not trying to separate your WP from their money (for parties, shoes, makeup, etc. for the wedding).

-Treating people with the common decency and respect you do every day.

Many brides seem to think that a wedding is a license to make their friends do things that they don't want to do.  99% of the time it's not necessary and not reasonable to do so, and people don't always just forgive and forget.

It's one thing to say, "I want chocolate wedding cake because it's my day!"  It's quite another to say, "This is my dream BM dress and you WILL wear it, no matter how expensive it is or how awful it looks on you.  It's my day, dammit!"  See the difference.

RebeccaB88

Barely into planning here.  I have told one person "It's not your day", which is kinda close.  And FI has told me "It's your day", which is very sweet of him. (He is incredibly supportive but not much interested in the planning process.)   I have also said to him "But it's your day too!", to which he's responded "And I want you to do it the way you want to."   Gosh, I love that man. 

I do, however, think there is a difference between a zilla-ish, tantrummy, bratty '"It's my day!" whine, and having the ability to stand up for yourself and your desires, and not allowing anyone to bully you into having something you don't really want, because it really isn't anyone else's day, but you and your FI's.  At least, at your wedding the two of you are the ones who matter most.

Trishes

I haven't said that. I have said "I'm too busy to deal with this sh*t, you do it". Or "I've got enough crap to do without having to work on her issues, too", all in relation to the wedding.

mrscarter052011

I haven't had the urge to utter "It's my day" yet but I have had to remind my mom and bff that it is FI's and I's wedding and therefore he gets a say in the planning.

megandjay

I said it to my Mom in the weeks before the wedding when she was saying that she wanted to wear a 'hatinator' (mix between a hat and a fascinator) because she had just been to a wedding in London and everyone wore them there. I pulled out the "it's my day and I say no hatinator". She took it fairly well, and I did it to save her some regret (which she would have regretted since no other women wore any head gear). I don't know, I could have just let her wear it, but it was so silly looking! It's not as though she was upset or anything either, and I did say it in a joking (but firm) way. Oh well.

For those of you not familiar- these are hatinators: