BM's not ordering dresses

staceyc196

So, I have 2 BMs and I have choosen dresses for them that are super cute, flattering and inexpensive ($50) that they can wear again to other events. My problem is that I have mentioned to them several times that we need to order their dresses (which they will be paying for) but they keep dodging it and putting it off. Now the wedding is less than 4 months away. How can I tackfully bring it up again without sounding like I am badgering or being demanding?

zitiqueen

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_bms-not-ordering-dresses?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:f4dbcaa2-3fb8-41d4-8384-37c1142c549dPost:1fb6f798-57f6-4282-b106-0e9f33c1a7b7">BM's not ordering dresses</a>:
[QUOTE]So, I have 2 BMs and I have choosen dresses for them that are super cute, flattering and inexpensive ($50) that they can wear again to other events. My problem is that I have mentioned to them several times that we need to order their dresses (which they will be paying for) but they keep dodging it and putting it off. Now the wedding is less than 4 months away. How can I tackfully bring it up again without sounding like I am badgering or being demanding?
Posted by staceyc196[/QUOTE]<p> </p><p>You can't TACTFULLY nag somebody. Send them one more email with the final date the dresses can be ordered by and that's all you can do. If they don't order the dresses, they've removed themselves from the wedding party. You can still get married without bridesmaids.</p>

mcda04

They still have a month at least to order them. Give them the drop dead date and if they don't order them; then you don't have bridesmaids.

Pookieson

I'm having this problem.  I have two BM who have until this Saturday. If they don't order, I'm down to 4 bridesmaids as opposed to six.  Oh well,  we shall see what happens.

QueerFemme

How about this, CALL your BMs and tell them that the dress HAS to be ordered by X date, and if they don't order them, there is a good chance the dresses will not arrive in time for the wedding. 

Before you make the phone calls though, find out what the real drop dead date is. Depending on where you are ordering from, that could be another 1-2 months.   Once you make this set of phone calls, let it go.  If they don't order them, then you can have a conversation with them that they will be honored guest at the wedding, but because they didn't ordere their dress on time, they won't be able to stand with you at the wedding.

Maggie0829

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_bms-not-ordering-dresses?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:f4dbcaa2-3fb8-41d4-8384-37c1142c549dPost:2ca70554-f866-4aac-a9db-0fdab5efe648">Re: BM's not ordering dresses</a>:
[QUOTE]How about this, <strong>CALL</strong> your BMs and tell them that the dress HAS to be ordered by X date, and if they don't order them, there is a good chance the dresses will not arrive in time for the wedding.  Before you make the phone calls though, find out what the real drop dead date is. Depending on where you are ordering from, that could be another 1-2 months.   Once you make this set of phone calls, let it go.  If they don't order them, then you can have a conversation with them that they will be honored guest at the wedding, but because they didn't ordere their dress on time, they won't be able to stand with you at the wedding.
Posted by cmgilpin[/QUOTE]

All of this, especially the bolded part.  CALL them.  Do not text or email.  They can easily be ignored or not noticed.  Actually CALL them up and talk to them.  This way you know that they received your message.

Viczaesar

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_bms-not-ordering-dresses?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:f4dbcaa2-3fb8-41d4-8384-37c1142c549dPost:c6980ddd-98e8-4035-82e5-9b05a7937ab0">Re: BM's not ordering dresses</a>:
[QUOTE]I'm having this problem.  I have two BM who have until this Saturday. If they don't order, I'm down to 4 bridesmaids as opposed to six.  Oh well,  we shall see what happens.
Posted by Shannon1401[/QUOTE]


That's just ridiculous. Your wedding isn't until June 1, they still have time to order a dress. If they don't have the dress by the actual wedding they've removed themselves, but it's ridiculous to arbitrarily kick them out 3.5 months before the wedding for not having ordered their dresses yet. Treat them like adults and let them be responsible for getting their own clothing.

Gustafson28

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_bms-not-ordering-dresses?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:f4dbcaa2-3fb8-41d4-8384-37c1142c549dPost:1936a1bd-0a10-47ac-8465-0d839100b600">Re: BM's not ordering dresses</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: BM's not ordering dresses :
That's just ridiculous. Your wedding isn't until June 1, they still have time to order a dress. If they don't have the dress by the actual wedding they've removed themselves, but it's ridiculous to arbitrarily kick them out 3.5 months before the wedding for not having ordered their dresses yet. Treat them like adults and let them be responsible for getting their own clothing.
Posted by Viczaesar[/QUOTE]




It might be a date the bridal store put in place, not the bride herself.

TKzilla

My advice is find out what is the absolute latest date for ordering, and then tell them that it's the week before. That gives you a little wiggle room in case someone forgets or has to wait for a paycheck. My FI and I decided to tell his groomsmen that they needed to order their tuxes two weeks before the actual "drop dead date" in case anyone got confused. It's like a little cushion for human error.

Viczaesar

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_bms-not-ordering-dresses?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:f4dbcaa2-3fb8-41d4-8384-37c1142c549dPost:adc73495-9524-45bf-a262-4e1609c37428">Re: BM's not ordering dresses</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: BM's not ordering dresses :


It might be a date the bridal store put in place, not the bride herself.
Posted by Gustafson28[/QUOTE]


Doesn't matter.

kamilovich

I'm not an expert on bridesmaid dresses or timing, but I thought I'd offer my experience. My bridesmaids and I went dress shopping in early January for my July wedding. It was very very early, and we definitely didn't need to do it then, but we are all students and were home for the holidays. Regardless, we got them from David's, and they told us that the dresses wouldn't be in until April for my four girls who ordered them one day, and then not until late May or June for the one who ordered a week later. Surprise surprise, the four who ordered first got an email a week or two ago that their dresses were in, and when the girl who ordered later called today her dress was also in. By no means am I saying order them with a month left, I'm just saying that my girls got theirs into the store within a month. So it might not be the end of the world if they miss the deadline.

Brittywest05

Honestly, it sounds like your girls may need a light push. I made the appointment for my girls to get measured and ordered, I told them the day and time and told them if they couldn't be there that day I would meet them at the store any day of the week that worked better for them, before th e group appointment.

MyNameIsNot

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_bms-not-ordering-dresses?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:f4dbcaa2-3fb8-41d4-8384-37c1142c549dPost:adc73495-9524-45bf-a262-4e1609c37428">Re: BM's not ordering dresses</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: BM's not ordering dresses : It might be a date the bridal store put in place, not the bride herself.
Posted by Gustafson28[/QUOTE]

<div>It doesn't matter.  </div><div>
</div><div>You still don't kick someone out for failing to order a dress months before the wedding.  There are always other stores that sell the dress, floor samples, online retailers, ebay, secondhand sellers, etc.  The BM will be responsible for scrambling after the dress, but that isn't the bride's problem.  </div>

slgirl21

I read all these post about ordering the dress 3 months before the wedding, but I think your like me, you want to make sure that the dresses are order in plenty of time in case if something happens. I was in my friends wedding and I order the dress by the deadline and guess what, the dress was on back order and it arrived 9 days before her wedding...then the other bridesmaid order the dress, picked it up, and about 3 or 4 days later her now husbands said "hey isnt your dress suppose to be blue, turns out they ordered the wrong color, so in tune they had to reorder the dress in the right color, I would call them and remind them to order the dress because unfortunlately things like this does happen and I would want to have an extra month tacked on, and if they don't order the dress, then they have removed themselves from your WP and dont let them tell you they can't afford a 50 dollars dress, hell you can buy there dresses for them if that's the issue, because 50 bucks is really cheap. where did you find such a cheap dress.

cassie409

Hi, everyone,  I suggest you the JenJenHosue if you want any dresses. Now, they are holding an activity on Facebook where there will be a big surprise. Ladies could take this chance and have a look.

cassie409

Hi, everyone,I know one good site: JenJenHouse.com. I recently bought one dress from them.

It arrived on time as promised and seriously is amazing! I paid 100.00 for this dress and it looks like I paid 500 for it! So pleased with this purchase!

Also, recently they have an activity on their FB. You could go and have a look.

You could also see the reviews on their website first and then decide.