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Monetary gifts preferred

Rhoyal_1Rhoyal_1
First Comment
in African American Weddings
So, FI and I both have houses and are combing when we move in together before the wedding.  We have a small registry to upgrade a few items and for items we really would like ( a juicer, wine cooler, etc).  Anywho, we do prefer monetary gifts as we really do not need too many things.  So, suggestions on how to word this on the website.  I am really oppossed to placing this on the invitation.  BTW- We have told family, the wedding party, and close friends to spread the word. 
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Re: Monetary gifts preferred

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    eagles347eagles347
    Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I don't think you should put it on the website. I promise I'm not just saying this because it's what "etiquette dictates," but because since you have created a small registry and let your family and friends know what's up, people will understand. We are doing the exact same thing and I'm confident that the hint will be taken even without us having to ask for anything, which can offend some people. You've done all of the right things so far.

    Another thing you could do...register at some place that doesn't have a local store...the shipping may scare people out of purchasing off the registry and they will probably give you money anyway. Okay...maybe that's not what I should be encouraging, but it's a thought.
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    MrsDorris2beMrsDorris2be
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I suggest having a wishing well  or card box at your reception and adding a cute poem or something on your website to notify guests. Examples I found online:


    They have their dishes and towels for two
    They have pots and pans and oven mitts too
    So what do you get for the Bride & Groom
    Whose house is setup in every room?
    Their house needs repairs and some upgrades too
    But you can not register for carpet and glue.
    A well that holds wishes is the way to go
    So lets make it easy for all that know.
    An envelope will be provided for those who have room,
    To give a monetary wish to the Bride and Groom
    A wishing well will be on display at the reception hall
    To attach your wishes, for the couple, with love from all.


    Another Example.....

    The tradition of the wishing well
    used on the wedding day,
    is here both for your money gifts
    and for what you would like to say.

    So please drop in a token of love
    for this special Groom & Bride,
    as they start their life united by God
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    KSTURGISKSTURGIS
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I dont think I would mention it at all. Let your parentsand  bp kind of spread it through word of mouth. You are on the right path with having a small registry. That will help you get monetary gifts as well.
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    MAGNUM06MAGNUM06
    First Comment
    edited December 2011

    I agree with the PP... not to put it on the website either... Most if not all of your guests are probably aware that you are combining homes and wont need many household items... therefore, they may give you cash or checks, simply because it's easier for them.... You've spread the word thru friends and family... that should be enough... for right now.  JMHO... Hope that helps.

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    Rhoyal_1Rhoyal_1
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    This does help ladies!  But what about the bridal shower?  Do I need a separate registry?  Do I stick with the "spread the word" etiquette?

    BTW- I agree with etiquette and have refused to list it on the invite.  However, some are saying it is okay to place it on the website.  The poems are cute but IDK.  I can see some fool placing a cute rock or something in the wishing well...we're having open bar!  LOL
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    bbyckesbbyckes member
    First Comment Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011

    I think you're on the money with having family and wedding party spread it word of mouth.  Generally if you have a small registry people will give you money.  Do not put this on the website or on the invitation.  And please don't include "cute" sayings or poems.  Like pp suggested, I wouldn't mention it at all.

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    desi2002desi2002 member
    First Anniversary Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    the poems are cute, but I personally wouldn't use them. I am doing the same thing. My mom will be spreading the word about the gift cards/ money. I didn't know that there was a registry for bridal showers. Don't people just get you lingire? What am I missing out on here? :(
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    MAGNUM06MAGNUM06
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Hi Ladies... Instead of doing a bridal shower registry....How about a themed bridal shower... something like... a round the clock shower: where on the invitations... the guests have a specific time of day or night... and their gift has to be appropriate for that time....that way you will get a variety of gifts... not just lingerie or gift cards... you get an assortment of everything.... You know... like from midnight to 2 am... you'll get lingerie... from 8pm -10pm...you'll get bath and body stuff.... for the daylight hours, you'll get giftcards, etc... on and on and on.... You know as women we like variety... try that...
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    cuddleberrycuddleberry
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_african-american-weddings_monetary-gifts-preferred?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:400Discussion:cbeb0562-d708-436b-8bed-074bfb1cc728Post:e540a50e-9789-4c62-bd8d-5f8cc5ced413">Re: Monetary gifts preferred</a>:
    [QUOTE]I suggest having a wishing well  or card box at your reception and adding a cute poem or something on your website to notify guests. Examples I found online: They have their dishes and towels for two They have pots and pans and oven mitts too So what do you get for the Bride & Groom Whose house is setup in every room? Their house needs repairs and some upgrades too But you can not register for carpet and glue. A well that holds wishes is the way to go So lets make it easy for all that know. An envelope will be provided for those who have room, To give a monetary wish to the Bride and Groom A wishing well will be on display at the reception hall To attach your wishes, for the couple, with love from all. Another Example..... The tradition of the wishing well used on the wedding day, is here both for your money gifts and for what you would like to say. So please drop in a token of love for this special Groom & Bride, as they start their life united by God
    Posted by MrsDorris2be[/QUOTE]


    I have a similar poem on my website. I don't see anything wrong with it. I have received invitations as well with this type poem printed on a small card. Either way though, people will give you money because some people don't like to shop.
    Anniversary
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    Rhoyal_1Rhoyal_1
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    @Magnum- I like your idea!  Wanna help my BMs plan!?  LOL  I think at this point I am sure of my decision to not include the money line anywhere on our info. 

    As far as a registry for the bridal shower, somme women have asked me where am I registered or where am I.  IDK, I thought folks used the same registry from the wedding and threw lingerie in for good measure.  I guess I am really lost.
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