Bachelorette Party

aquari0216

My MOHs have heard it before and seen it work, to charge ppl a small donation for things like the party bus, food and club entry. The bigger question is of inviting ppl who aren't invited to the wedding on our girls night out...i may know some and I may not know others? Is there a line to cross? Is it a big No No? I don't want my BP killing their pockets but I don't want them to be rude and have expectations they shouldn't have? Is this idea rude? If not what's the correct wording?

ladycane015

I kinda think it could come off rude to invite them to the Bachelorette Party to celebrate you but not invite them to the actual celebration, especially being that they're gonna have to pay to attend  I definitely understand the thought but I think it is a no no. I also think that they may assume they're obviously invited to the wedding as well imo.

keyaira04

I would not say its a major no no, but I would be a little put off if I was invite to a b-party but not the wedding. 

[Deleted User]

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_african-american-weddings_bachelorette-party-6?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:400Discussion:f52d262a-3dff-4acf-bf19-dcb913ff12c5Post:cf2965b6-70b8-45f2-bc0d-3d89f5c716ab">Bachelorette Party</a>:
[QUOTE]My MOHs have heard it before and seen it work, <strong>to charge ppl a small donation </strong>for things like the party bus, food and club entry. The bigger question is of inviting ppl who aren't invited to the wedding on our girls night out...i may know some and I may not know others? Is there a line to cross? Is it a big No No? I don't want my BP killing their pockets but I don't want them to be rude and have expectations they shouldn't have? Is this idea rude? If not what's the correct wording?
Posted by aquari0216[/QUOTE]

(I think) I know what you meant but donations cannot be charged, they're voluntary.  I'm sure your girls mean well and have seen it done, and I know you didn't ask this, but:  it's improper to *charge* a guest.   Sorry, i'm reading as I go, I mean excluding the club.  the stuff they rent/hire, they pay for. 

As for the part you did ask about, it's also becoming more common to invite folks to a shower or bachelorette party who aren't invited to the wedding.  the traditional view on that is that it implies that they're good enough to spend money on you (by coming to a party where they're expected to bring you a gift), but not good enough for you to spend money on them (as a wedding guest).   the solution might be to host an event  that doesn't imply that your guests show up with a gift (like breakfast) that isn't time sensitive and where you can be with any/everybody who wasn't included in your day. 

<a href="http://www.emilypost.com/weddings/youre-engaged/655-inside-weddings-celebrating-your-engagement" rel="nofollow">http://www.emilypost.com/weddings/youre-engaged/655-inside-weddings-celebrating-your-engagement</a>

hope that helped ;)

M1ssJ

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_african-american-weddings_bachelorette-party-6?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:400Discussion:f52d262a-3dff-4acf-bf19-dcb913ff12c5Post:cf2965b6-70b8-45f2-bc0d-3d89f5c716ab">Bachelorette Party</a>:
[QUOTE]My MOHs have heard it before and seen it work,<strong> to charge ppl a small donation for things like the party bus, food and club entry. </strong>The bigger question is of inviting ppl who aren't invited to the wedding on our girls night out...i may know some and I may not know others? Is there a line to cross? Is it a big No No? I don't want my BP killing their pockets but I don't want them to be rude and have expectations they shouldn't have? Is this idea rude? If not what's the correct wording?
Posted by aquari0216[/QUOTE]

So I've been to stuff like this but I think it's different when it's in honor of one person (you) and if I werent invited to the wedding I would catch a mini attitude. It kind of says "put in on my good time but don't ask about the actual event"

I would just let your MOH know that whatever they can do in their budget  is fine although you appreciate them trying to make it grander for you