Hey De-Lurked! Confessions!

awesome-sauce

O-Face I too used ribbons. Personalized with our names and wedding date. Yes, Pink tubes of bubbles, with heart wands, personalized chocolate ribbon with pink writing. You know what's really gross though? We went to one of H's younger cousin's wedding a month or so ago. One of his other cousin's H's pulled something out of his suit pocket and was like what is this? We all realized it was BUBBLES FROM OUR WEDDING! Our wedding a year ago. I feel like he should've had his suit cleaned, yes?

Cant_wait!

This may cement my way to hell, but I don't see a problem in lying to a preist. Maybe it's because I'm not Catholic, but he's just another person you're paying to provide a service. he doesn't need to know the details of your life.

Mrs.Thistletwat

well it's super tiny now. S&V FAIL at photo sharing.

sam&val

We had the personalized name/date ribbon, too. And I think it may have gone on our invites, too. No bubbles, though.

hmonkey

cw, that's not the way catholicism works.  i know you don't know that because you didn't have a church wedding and cut off your hair.

sam&val

Me = FAIL.

VarunaTT

CW, they have to lie or the priest WOULDN'T MARRY THEM b/c it goes against the tenements of the religion he works for.  That's what makes it BS.  They're lying and that means he will do something he is morally opposed to. 

PMeg819

I'm not going to lie, but I don't see what's the big deal about lying to a priest either. Let's face it, human nature is that we lie. I'm assuming that she knows that the Catholic church is against premarital sex, living together before marriage. So why does the priest need to know and why does he need to shame her for doing it? It's between her and God in the end.

Cant_wait!

amen, I do not know. But I would lie.  What if he refuses because they live together and then they cant have a church wedding and then their families disown them because they didn't have a church wedding and they'll be cut out of the wills and have nowhere to go for thanksgiving? What then?

hmonkey

then they will have to diy their giblets.  big deal.

VarunaTT

I don't understand disagreeing with the basic tenements of the religion and still thinking it's so damned important to be married ACCORDING TO THE BASIC TENEMENTS OF THE RELIGION.

PMeg819

I guess I take more issue with the Catholic church. We all sin, so why should someone be denied marriage for that particular sin. And I know, if you want to get married in that church you abide by their rules. But their rules are stupid.

Cant_wait!

till thinking it's so damned important to be married ACCORDING TO THE BASIC TENEMENTS OF THE RELIGION.But they don't care. They're only doing it to please thier families.

jojobrn

I don't have too serious of an issue with the lying. My college roommate tried for the Catholic wedding to please mostly her IL's. They did everything they should and they weren't living together.The priest threw a minor fit over the fact that in the bridal party, only the best man was catholic. Even better is that I, the MOH, am Lutheran. Also, he went off about what kind of flowers he thought she should have, that she could only have a 10 am wedding time and what were they thinking having a reception some place else other then the parish hall?They got a friend who is a chaplin to perform their outdoor (gasp!) wedding ceremony.

VarunaTT

And how many beebees have we flamed for doing something to please their families?  Accusing them of not being grown up enough to stand up to their families meaning they're not grown enough to be married?I believe BMom was still married by her priest and she didn't lie.  I don't think they should lie, I think they should find a priest that is okay with it (and there are some branches of Catholicism that don't like it, but won't refuse to marry you).

jessjo04

I don't think I would lie to a priest. Guess it depends, is it a lie by omission, or will he flat out ask if you live together? I was raised Catholic, but strict and outdated rules is the reason I converted to Methodist.

6fsn

A priest will still marry you if you live together.  He'll just ask you to go to confession and abstain prior to the ceremony.  Don't lie about it.My confession: I'm pissed my mom will take a day off work to watch my sister's kids, but won't take the day off to watch 6let next week.

PMeg819

I got married in a church to please my family. Then again, my parents had offered to pay for it and that was their wish. We were upfront with the minister that we weren't regular church goers.

jepm1129

Well, it's important for exactly the reason I said.  My family wouldn't disown me over it, it's just what they would like and we don't have a problem attempting to accomodate them.  I do disagree with some of the basic tenements of the religion, but can they tell me they know for a fact that Jesus agrees with them all?  I'd guess no.  I don't know if he'll ask us about it or not...he may not even have a problem with it, since we're trying to "fix" it by getting married.  We're going to feel it out and go from there.

VarunaTT

I just don't think you should lie to get someone to do what you want.  It's not the religious aspect, it's that they are considering lying b/c they're afraid someone won't do X, what they want them to do, if they don't lie.  I just think that's wrong.

awesome-sauce

I had my V-card until I was 22. Yup, waited for my now H. It was by choice. *However, I did not throw that fact around. I had friends who did with whoever, whenever. I didn't care whether they did or not.Mostly I just didn't want to catch the preggers or the herpes.

austinandstella

I know I'm not really a regular here, but I hope you all don't mind my input. As a non-Catholic I have to say I don't mind lying to a priest because after everything I have a studied and learned about christian history I feel that if there are saints that did similar things and are still widely accepted, or that there are hundreds of unmarked graves in a lot of really old parrish and nunery graveyards of children that were born from the priests that came to "worship" with the nuns and then were not taken care of or aborted, or the fact that if you just pay the church enough they can forgive you for your sins, and god has nothing to do with it then I don't see how one little lie can really be that bad. But...you all look like a fun group. I was wondering if there is anything that you did during or for your weddings that you wish you didn't?

Future Mrs Butterworth

or the fact that if you just pay the church enough they can forgive you for your sins, I am DED. I'm not even religious and I wouldn't come to that conclusion, ever.

jessjo04

O rly?

jojobrn

Um, pretty sure the sale of indulgences went out a long time ago.

Cant_wait!

or the fact that if you just pay the church enough they can forgive you for your sins,hahaha! Awesome.

NOLABridesmaid

I think I want to hear more from Austin.

jojobrn

Maybe we should page her.

austinandstella

The way I understand it is that "officially" the sale of indulgences is out, but in practice...not so much.  Much like you can't be gay and a priest, but it is quite common. I even have a gay friend who is in the process of becoming a priest. I'm not trying to offend anyone and I know that a lot of catholics aren't the way I am descirbing or anything. It's just that personally I have trouble supporting an institution with such divergence.  That's why I have trouble supporting a lot of "churchs"

jojobrn

BTW it is churches. With an E.Tell us more about yourself.