Worst Maids of HOnor ever!!!!

MrsHoward11

AGH!!!!!!!!!!! My maids of honor suck! We were supposed to go dress shopping yesterday and they bailed because they were too hung over.  I was so upset I cancelled the appointment.  HOw am I supposed to find a dress without my MOH there? really? Here's the kicker, I had to call them to find out they were bailing...don't think they had even thought about calling.  My bridesmaid, Kim is amazing though and when she heard me crying over the phone she came to the rescue with Ben and Jerry's Ice cream. She and i have been friends for 14 years and this is an old tradition of ours.I"m wishing now that I had asked Kim to be my MOH. I was a BM in her wedding 6 years ago.  The reason I asked the 2 girls I did is because I've been best friend with both of them for a long time too and Kim and I weren't hanging out as much at the time of me asking.  This is the worst case of selffishness I've seen from the girls, but definitely not the first. I just made the mistake of thinking they'd come through for my wedding of all things.  

So what do I do? Do I just not have a MOH? Do I kick them out? I've messaged them both (I think they're afraid to answer the phone b/c I'm so mad) telling them how hurt I am and that I'm disappointed and that they need to either get on board or not. I also rescheduled the appt to today and one of them has already said she woul dbe there. The other one (and the main one) hasn't gotten back to me yet.  i think if I don't hear from her by 2 i'll take a drive to her house cause she lost her phone. If she doesn't show up today though what do I do? 

*Barbie*

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_wedding-woes_worst-maids-of-honor-ever?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:47Discussion:4ded66d0-afcd-49a1-8af0-24776c53e0aePost:268f06a8-8ddb-446e-ac87-d4096e4ba05b">Worst Maids of HOnor ever!!!!</a>:
[QUOTE]AGH!!!!!!!!!!! My maids of honor suck! We were supposed to go dress shopping yesterday and they bailed because they were too hung over.  I was so upset I cancelled the appointment.  <strong>HOw am I supposed to find a dress without my MOH there?</strong> really? Here's the kicker, I had to call them to find out they were bailing...don't think they had even thought about calling.  My bridesmaid, Kim is amazing though and when she heard me crying over the phone she came to the rescue with Ben and Jerry's Ice cream. She and i have been friends for 14 years and this is an old tradition of ours.I"m wishing now that I had asked Kim to be my MOH. I was a BM in her wedding 6 years ago.  The reason I asked the 2 girls I did is because I've been best friend with both of them for a long time too and Kim and I weren't hanging out as much at the time of me asking.  This is the worst case of selffishness I've seen from the girls, but definitely not the first. I just made the mistake of thinking they'd come through for my wedding of all things.   So what do I do? Do I just not have a MOH? Do I kick them out? I've messaged them both (I think they're afraid to answer the phone b/c I'm so mad) telling them how hurt I am and that I'm disappointed and that they need to either get on board or not. I also rescheduled the appt to today and one of them has already said she woul dbe there. The other one (and the main one) hasn't gotten back to me yet.  i think if I don't hear from her by 2 i'll take a drive to her house cause she lost her phone. If she doesn't show up today though what do I do? 
Posted by MrsHoward11[/QUOTE]

are you that incapable of dressing yourself, and choosing something that you like, that you are unable to go alone?

do you need your MOHs to wipe your ass for you too?

dump those drunken slores!

mrsconn23

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_wedding-woes_worst-maids-of-honor-ever?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:47Discussion:4ded66d0-afcd-49a1-8af0-24776c53e0aePost:268f06a8-8ddb-446e-ac87-d4096e4ba05b">Worst Maids of HOnor ever!!!!</a>:
[QUOTE]AGH!!!!!!!!!!! My maids of honor suck! We were supposed to go dress shopping yesterday and they bailed because they were too hung over.  I was so upset I cancelled the appointment.  <strong>HOw am I supposed to find a dress without my MOH there? really?</strong> Here's the kicker, I had to call them to find out they were bailing...don't think they had even thought about calling.  My bridesmaid, Kim is amazing though and when she heard me crying over the phone she came to the rescue with Ben and Jerry's Ice cream. She and i have been friends for 14 years and this is an old tradition of ours.I"m wishing now that I had asked Kim to be my MOH. I was a BM in her wedding 6 years ago.  The reason I asked the 2 girls I did is because I've been best friend with both of them for a long time too and Kim and I weren't hanging out as much at the time of me asking.  This is the worst case of selffishness I've seen from the girls, but definitely not the first. I just made the mistake of thinking they'd come through for my wedding of all things.   So what do I do? Do I just not have a MOH? Do I kick them out? I've messaged them both (I think they're afraid to answer the phone b/c I'm so mad) telling them how hurt I am and that I'm disappointed and that they need to either get on board or not. I also rescheduled the appt to today and one of them has already said she woul dbe there. The other one (and the main one) hasn't gotten back to me yet.  i think if I don't hear from her by 2 i'll take a drive to her house cause she lost her phone. If she doesn't show up today though what do I do? 
Posted by MrsHoward11[/QUOTE]

Was this dress shopping for you, them, or both?

Why the big shopping trip with everyone?  Why didn't you just go out with your BM instead of spending the afternoon crying into your B&J's?

There's also nothing wrong with giving your bridal party a color scheme and letting them shop by themselves and pick out a dress all on their own.

tawillers

While it IS schitty that they didn't consider letting you know they were not going to make it, you don't have to have them there to find a dress.

baconsmom

I feel like this was written by a robot who's studying romantic comedies in order to act like a woman. Bad maids, dress shopping, Ben&Jerry's? Really? It's all so - lowest common denominator. 

IOW, I just don't care. 

XxmcuhlovejennxX

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_wedding-woes_worst-maids-of-honor-ever?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:47Discussion:4ded66d0-afcd-49a1-8af0-24776c53e0aePost:f0c24164-20b6-4aa8-aca5-d9848a0f58b1">Re: Worst Maids of HOnor ever!!!!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Worst Maids of HOnor ever!!!! : are you that incapable of dressing yourself, and choosing something that you like, that you are unable to go alone? do you need your MOHs to wipe your ass for you too? dump those drunken slores!
Posted by *Barbie*[/QUOTE]

wow... whats wrong with you? you clearly have issues, that was INCREDIBLY RUDE

anyway, awh  you're upsent you dont need people liek this making it worse,  just take kim, their the ones missing out :)

ashleycameron9

people on here are so rude to others.i would want my girls there too. you want to share that moment with your closest girl. sure you can dress yourself, but when it comes to your wedding gown who wants to do that alone. kim's an awesome friend and you should defiantly not let the other girls off easy on this one. let them know how badly that hurt, that getting drunk the night before they had wedding plans with you was selfish and uncool. and don't listen when other snarky brides are being bitchy. they obviously have nothing better to do than trash on other brides. and if they don't care for what you are posting than they shouldn't waste their time responding.

zitiqueen

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_wedding-woes_worst-maids-of-honor-ever?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:47Discussion:4ded66d0-afcd-49a1-8af0-24776c53e0aePost:c7f637a8-768b-4d4c-8b96-a8ca36f550d3">Re: Worst Maids of HOnor ever!!!!</a>:
[QUOTE]people on here are so rude to others.i would want my girls there too. you want to share that moment with your closest girl. sure you can dress yourself, but when it comes to your wedding gown who wants to do that alone. kim's an awesome friend and you should defiantly not let the other girls off easy on this one. let them know how badly that hurt, that getting drunk the night before they had wedding plans with you was selfish and uncool. and don't listen when other snarky brides are being bitchy. they obviously have nothing better to do than trash on other brides. and if they don't care for what you are posting than they shouldn't waste their time responding.
Posted by ashleycameron9[/QUOTE]

Who made you the boss of the Knot?

*Barbie*

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_wedding-woes_worst-maids-of-honor-ever?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:47Discussion:4ded66d0-afcd-49a1-8af0-24776c53e0aePost:9da32582-010f-4d88-9f0e-ad241b299d6a">Re: Worst Maids of HOnor ever!!!!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Worst Maids of HOnor ever!!!! : Who made you the boss of the Knot?
Posted by zitiqueen[/QUOTE]

yeah, i wouldn't be relying on the advice of someone who hasn't managed to cut the apron strings and is living off of student loan money.

katehar01

1covejack, I agree with you that you were not being rude, because you expressed your different opinion in a respectful and constructive way.  The problem is that many women who seem to be on here just to put down other brides.  If you don't have anything constructive to say, don't say anything at all.  I know some brides who won't even come onto these message boards anymore after being borderline verbally abused by other posters.  It's just a shame that people turn it into something it's not meant to be.

OP, your friends' behavior was shitty, but not kick-out-of-bridal-party worthy.  You seem upset, so I would back off your friends until you calm down a bit and can have a more productive conversation with them.  It seems like their roles and responsibilities weren't discussed at the beginning, so sit down with them and tell them how you'd LIKE them to be involved, then see how they're WILLING to be involved.  If there's slack, let Kim pick it up...and maybe get her an extra special BM gift when this is all over:)

MrsHoward11

Thank you to everyone who wasn't a total jerk! Apparnelty some of the people on here need a lesson in manners.  I was simply upset considering it wasn't the fact that they weren't coming, it was more the fact that they were so inconsiderate. And yes Barbie, I am capable of "wiping my own ass" without my MOH but some people actually like to have another opinion, especially when that opinion is coming form someone who has been my bff for 10 years. next time, if you're just going to be rude and snarky just don't respond. Obviously you are not capapble of being polite so good luck in life. 

I have talked to my MOH since and we are on good terms again.  They apologized for being inconsiderate and we figured out who is going to do what since there are 2 of them.  Thank you again to those of you who offered constructive advice. I don't care about being disagreed with, it is when I am verbally abused and put down by other brides who clearly have not learned how to carry on a polite conversation.  I would hate to think about the way those brides treat their fiances or husbands, if they can't even be polite to a perfect stranger asking for advice.