As of today, new boss is officially taking over. Which is just as well, because I had to go ask Old Boss about one of the projects he was supposed to be managing (and wasn't really) after work BFF left, and OB was just sort of curt and impatient about the whole thing. Thanks for your help, a$$hole. He made it pretty obvious all along that he couldn't be bothered, so I'm happy for him (and us) that he's doing something else now. Hopefully he enjoys that more than he did managing my dept. But is it too much to ask that you tell me WTF is going on with something I'm supposedly taking over today? Seriously, he was edging toward his office the whole time, no eye contact, clearly just wanted to get thefuck away. FINE.
On the plus side, I imagine it's the last y'all will have to hear about him from me, ever. Here's hoping new boss is awesome. I'm so lame, in that I really want him to like me. I shouldn't care, but there it is.