Sit-Down Dinner vs. Finger-food reception

j.reynolds

Hi, my fiance and I are planning a rustic wedding on a tight budget and considering forgoing the traditional sit-down dinner-style reception in favour of a more party-style reception with lighter fare (and drinks) that you can eat while mingling. We plan on having a dance either way. Thoughts on the pros/cons? We're worried about people not taking the second option as seriously as they would the first. Example: His parents have a history of leaving parties early, they didn't stay at our engagement party longer than 30 mins!

Also, if we went without the full dinner, what time of the evening would you recommend having the reception? My mom has been telling me that it would have to be later if we weren't serving dinner.

LeiselEB

You can still have it at dinner time, but be sure that all the food is substantial, not just a whole bunch of appetizers. 

We discussed the same thing and ultimately went with a dinner for a number of reasons - but a few major ones stuck out.  We wanted everyone to have a seat and to be able to sit down and have a meal, rather than handle a purse, drink, plate, and try to eat at the same time. Mingling is great, but sometimes you just want to sit down to have your dinner. We opted to have a cocktail hour for mingling, let people sit down, and then have dancing.

Another problem that I saw at friends' weddings that had no sit down dinner was that guests wouldn't eat because they didn't have anywhere to sit or because it was too tough to handle all the other things they're carrying while eating, so they'd just drink all night. This ran up bar tabs for the hosts, and it meant lots of left over food.

Many of this type of party don't have seating/tables for everyone in order to encourage mingling, but that can backfire and encourage guests to sit down and never move for fear of losing their chair/"spot" for the night. Also, many people will want to leave their purse, suit jacket, etc. somewhere while they dance, and if you don't have a seat/table for everyone, that's kind of annoying. If you have enough seats for everyone, you can still do heavy apps rather than a dinner, however. 

Hope that helps! It's just what we thought of, but your idea might be different. I'd talk to the venue and your caterers and see what they think. They've probably been through all the kinds of weddings before and will know more specifics.

Amandarose531

If you have seating for everyone, finger foods are fine.

I just met with my caterer and he said they do it all the time with just some "heavy apps" and people scarf those while drinking and mingling so long as they have a place to sit.

He suggested to me an affordable option that we may do, one of their most popular items is a mashed potato bar with various toppings, it cuts down on cost and creates variety with a substantial base (potato) with different meat/veggies/etc. toppings. Plus some veggie and fruit trays, dips etc.

edited to add: we're having our reception at 6pm, I think it depends on your guests. Our family makes up 98% of our guest list and we've been told by them to not over-do it because they're coming to see us, of course, and get their drink on ( We have open bar, haha) 

We have family parties all the time like this with drinks and heavy apps and they work out seamlessly.

LuckyGirl1713

I thought of doing a cocktail food type reception but I would still definitely have more then enough seats for everyone (possibly still reserved seating or at least reserved tables) and maybe for the first hour do slow or "light" music so that people can have a good solid hour (even if its not a fancy 4 course meal) of eating and then the rest party time while still doing passed appetizers or food stations.

aragx6

I've been to heavy hors d'oeuvres weddings that were definitely filling enough to be a meal -- as long as you go this route and have a chairfor every person, you're good.

alithebride

if you have an HD reception have a seat and table spot for everyone. HDs dont encourage mingling. people will mingle on their own.