Venue Dilemna

ddwedding2010

So i have a HUGE Dilemna.  We are planning an October 2010 Wedding and have started looking at venues.  We both LOVE the National Constitution Center and think the Crystal Tea Room is nice (but my fiance doesn't love the fact that there are no windows and its dark) and my parents (who are paying) like the idea of the CTR b/c they've been to a wedding there before.  The problem is despite our love for the NCC, its probably going to cost at least $12K more.  One option is to take some of the money saved from not having it at the NCC and use it towards sprucing up the CTR.  Granted we are still looking at other venues, but between the two its tough to decide.  Any suggestions?

j&p2009

Both are beautiful venues. I've been to the NCC before several times for black tie events and they were wonderful. I haven't been to the CTR for a wedding. Perhaps you could work with Synergetic Sounds (or a company like them) and do some uplighting? That would make a difference. This company is based in Boston, but they have a fab blog with tons of lighting ideas. There is one venue that doesn't have any windows and with the lighting they created, it just looks beautiful! http://rcuplighting.com/blog/

jewels2730

You could take the $12k and hire an event company and they could make the room look better with lighting and decor.  It's a vast room though.  I've done work events there and it's difficult to make the whole place look full and have a cohesive design, without tens of thousands of dollars. Also, have you looked down at the CTR carpet?  They get it cleaned often, but sometimes it looks like hell.  Personally, I would go for the NCC, but working on budget and varying opinions with your family can be very difficult.  GL!

PhillyCopWife 2 B

If FI wants windows, Try the Curtis Center. That place is beautiful. From what I hear, the NCC you have to bring in your own tables, etc. Right? The Curtis Center again, from what I hear is a little cheaper then the CTR. I was at a wedding at the CTR about a year ago and the bride and groom paid almost $200 bucks a head. Also, downtown there is the Racquet Club, The Bellevue

Ms.BriarRose

I don't know much about either venue, but I can tell you that several girls have mentioned before that the acoustics at the NCC are not spectacular at all.  I know it seems silly to consider that, but if you think about it, if no one can hear the introductions, the speeches, the music, then how will the entire event go over?  If the guests can't hear, will they stay?  I know if I can't hear anything, by the time dinner and all was over and the music/dancing had started, I would probably leave.Just a thought.  I hope you find the venue that works for you!  Good luck in your search!

samanthas8882

I say go with the cheaper venue - it looks really pretty. I also recommend going for a lighting package and that will make it. I have been to the National Constitution Center and although it is nice, I think it is too big for most weddings... unless you have a huge wedding. 12k is a lot of money. And trust me, after your wedding is over, you will be glad you have the 12k for something else. Your wedding is only for a few hours.

ddwedding2010

Thanks all for your input.  Re the carpet, my FI said the same thing!  His concern is the place is a "wedding factory" and that its old (compared to the NCC of course).  My parents went to a wedding at the Curtis Center and did not like it so that's out of the question (since they're footing the bill).  The big difference in price btwn NCC and CTR is really attributed to a sunday discount available at the CTR and a rental fee required at the NCC.  I know $12K extra is a lot to blow on a wedding, but then again its a once in a lifetime event.  I am still torn and hope maybe these other venues that i am going to check out (Top of Tower, PAFA and Union League) will maybe change things. 

jessicah628

Briar, if you were at a wedding where the sound was bad, you would leave???Glad you're not my friend.

ooodsie

Your parents went to a wedding at the curtis center and didn't like it? Not questioning their opinion, but I've never heard that response before to the Curtis Center, just curious as to why they didnt like it?

amy052006

I just can't.  Getting rid of coffee and tea to save a buck, where to buy shiit for a bathroom basket, and BMs backing out of weddings two weeks before because they supposedly can't afford the dress -- these are all things I can ignore.  This is the post that broke the camel's back.Who leaves a wedding because the sounds is bad?  That undeniably makes you an asshat.As for the OP, sounds like you made a deal with the devil on this one.  I go with option C, be a big girl and stop letting your parents control you with money.  It sounds like they are going to make all the decisions anyway, so why bother asking us?

kagkiki11

I went to a wedding at the CTR and I was not overly impressed.  The space was SO huge and VERY dark.

ValAndRyan

Find another venue that you love. My rule of thumb was that if I didn't like the room the way it was without spending more money to spruce it up, then it wasn't the right one. Save the $12K.

[Deleted User]

Ditto to exactly what Val said.

Ms.BriarRose

I would leave the wedding because I can't dance to begin with because of my disease, so if I can't hear the music and am basically stuck in the corner by myself, then I am going to leave.  I would be honest with the bride and groom and tell them why, and I have done this, and they were very understanding about it all, especially when you add my disease into the equation.So no, it doesn't make me an a$$, Amy.  It makes me human that I don't like being alone in a corner at a table by myself while everyone else is at least dancing, even if they can't hear the music.  Find out the facts before you pass judgment.  And based on some of your other responses, JessH, to not only my posts but others as well, I am glad you aren't my friend, either.  Glad we can agree on that.People need to find out the story before passing judgment.

amy052006

I'm sorry, disease or not, I'm dumbfounded you think it is ok to go up to a bride and groom AT THEIR WEDDING, and say "So, the sound isn't working for me, I'm out of here."That is really messed up.

Ms.BriarRose

I didn't do it at their wedding, I explained after, and they were fine with it.  No sound, no dancing, and high pain levels = I am going home where I am comfortable and taking my pain meds.  I don't care who you are, and if you don't understand my situation and respect it, then you probably don't know me that well and won't be invited to my wedding anyway.

amy052006

But seriously, wouldn't the pain levels be the same regardless of the sounds quality?  One doesn't have anything to do with the other.

ValAndRyan

BR, are you saying that you really leave almost all weddings before the dancing begins anyway because of your disease? Not that you wouldn't leave because of the sound? I can understand that.

Ms.BriarRose

Actually, they do, especially when the wedding was at night.  But see, since you don't know me, or the disease I have, you wouldn't understand.  It's RSD/CRPS, if you would really like to learn about it.  Otherwise, I'm done with this.  I stand by my decision, and the Bride/Groom (who happened to be family) completely understood why I decided to leave early.  That's all that matters.

Ms.BriarRose

Val, you pretty much hit it on the head.  We stay through a little bit (mostly through cake cutting), but then we skedadle, if we are driving ourselves.  If the sound isn't good and I am having a flare-up or a bad day to begin with, we leave a little earlier than normal, but either way, we leave early.

ValAndRyan

Ok, got it. Yeah, that would stink to watch everyone dance all the time when you wish you could be up there.

jessica0602

i rate this post as awesome.

amy052006

BR, I know what that is, and not being able to hear music playing doesn't effect it.Come and go as you please wherever you want.  But what you said was if you couldn't hear the music and were in pain, you'd leave.  The poor volume of the music doesn't have anything to do with it.  If anything, it would be worse if the music was loud, right?

ddwedding2010

Oh my.  um thanks for the input re sound.  it is something to consider though its not a sticking point.  Re the Curtis Center, they didnt like it because they did not like how the storefronts were "disgused" or lack thereof.  I dont know the details because I wasn't there.  As for my parents controling where i want to have the wedding??? Um, they're paying for it so i take their thoughts into CONSIDERATION.  My mom doesn't care for the NCC, but that doesn't change my thoughts about it (though the hefty $$ tag does).  Weddings are a celebration of FAMILY so i think what our parents think have a big impact.  and no, the NCC doesnt require you to bring your own chairs and tables.  the catering company takes care of that (though their standard chairs are ugly plstic ikea-like chairs).Val- good call.  we are continuing to look at other places as options.  i was trying to stay away from the hotel ballroom thing, but i guess the CTR isn't any different. 

Ms.BriarRose

Thank you, Val- you pretty much hit it on the head.  If the music/sound is good, at least I can bop along sitting down at the table.  If not, and I can't get up and dance, then we usually leave a little earlier than normal.  It's no fun going to weddings and being stuck at the table while everyone else is up dancing.  Thankfully, my FI is wonderful and stays by my side the whole time and talks to me and keeps me company.

rumdrinx

it is one thing to tell the OP that people are going to leave because her sound quality sucks (which is what you said before)it is another to tell her that people are going to leave because her sound quality sucks when what you MEANT TO WRITE was that only everyone that has your same disease at her wedding will leave her wedding because of pain and it has nothing to do with music.   

jessica0602

BR - what i don't understand is what someone else said earlier, why would you go up to the B&G at their reception to tell them of your desire to leave.  it's their wedding day.  write them a freaking note, don't be a party pooper. rum & amy - we've missed you around these parts.

jessicah628

Seriously BR, I'm very sorry that you're sick. I may not like you, but I don't wish illness on anyone. However,  I object to your martyr tone, which suggests that anyone who criticizes you is evil because HOW CAN YOU BE MEAN TO THE SICK GIRL and YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT I'M GOING THROUGH.The fact is, you don't make sense. You're right, I don't know your disease. But if you can't stand up and dance and the sound is bad, maybe you should move yourself to a seat near the dance floor even if you can't be up dancing. That way, you're still near the fun. And if you're in too much pain either way to stay, then don't make stupid comments about how you'd leave if you couldn't hear the music.

j&p2009

DD - have you considered Ballroom at the Ben? That's a really nice spot too. Some great options on your list!

kpenne01

I haven't been to any of those, but as Val said if you're not feeling 100% about it, keep looking.  PP suggested ballroom at the ben and if you are set on staying in the city you may want to check out Moshulu.

STBS NYE 09

Like PP's said, I would keep looking...if you don't love CTR and can't afford NCC then keep looking at venues until you find one that you love in your price range.  You should not have to settle or spend $12k over budget to have your wedding at a place you will love!