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Help- not a bride anymore...now a bridesmaid

Hi everyone,
So my Friend of 9 years, is now going to be my sister in law. she is marrying my brother in law...so excited. However......my in laws are "hardcore" italians. my friend (and myself) are Canadian heritage,...I know when I got married I had some tirals dealing with the big wedding thing....I had only eveer dreamed of an 80 person wedding.....well my friend, she never dreamed of a wedding at all, and at most wanted 10 people there, she does not like to be the centre of attention. But she is having a big wedding to please her groom. what I am trying to do is make her excited about it. I feel horrible that she isn't having any fun planning her wedding and I am trying to help. They also have next to no money for anything other than the venue and dinner....so I am trying to DIY everything for her...I am doing her hair, her make up, I am altering her dress for her, I am making additions to her wedding shoes, I am making paper music flowers for the wedding....AHHHHHHHH!!! I am one busy bridesmaid.....does anyone know 1...how to make a huge wedding seem intimate on a dime budget? and 2- does anyone know of any kind of bride swap meet or anything like that where we could get free wedding decor from...I am craft and can change almost anything. please help if you can

Re: Help- not a bride anymore...now a bridesmaid

  • naomikbnaomikb member
    2500 Comments Combo Breaker
    edited May 2012
    What do the bride/groom want?  Do they have a budget?  Typically "hardcore" Italian families contribute money to the wedding.  Are the parents contributing? What exactly do you mean by "dime budget"?

    The best way to make a huge wedding (if the guest list is set in stone) cheaper is to not do a full meal.  A full meal in the GTA will usually run you $80-$180 pp, although you can find some places in the $50-$80 range.  They could do desserts and cake and non-alcoholic drinks or an afternoon reception with just snacks.  As soon as you get away from that into full meals with bar then the prices go way up.

    DIY can be fun but unfortunately isn't always cheaper for flowers, favours, invitations, decorations, etc.  There are cheap things to get (Dollarama, Vistaprint) that can be cheaper than doing it yourself.

    I don't know of any organized bride swaps but you can post on here and on Kijiji/Craigslist looking for things.  It might be hard to find free stuff but brides often resell their items that you can buy for a discounted price, like vases, centerpieces, etc.

  • Also check out weddingful.com - they have discounts on vendors and services there.  As well, frugalbride.com.  A lot of brides sell stuff on there as well.  Maybe some of the other bridal party might pitch in?

    And as Naomi said, usually Italian weddings are already paid for since most will pay for their plate.  Has your friend talked to her FMIL about everything?
  • edited May 2012
    Thanks Ladies....well it is hardcore to a degree...the parents of the groom who are Italian...will not be paying for the wedding...they are my in laws too....they will be giving a HUGE wedding gift however, and they asked....they do not want to give the money prior to the wedding. Our Father and Mother in law....aren't big fans that me and my friend who are Canadian....are marrying/married their sons. They like me as a person but the "issue" that I am not italian always comes up. so....needless to say. the money will be later.

    Thank you so much for those sites...i will check them out for sure!

    She was told that she has to do a full dinner for the 150 people....her groom is also insisting on the numbers because of tradition...not what she wants...but she loves him adn that is what he wants. 

    By dime budget....she found a location who is going to do it for 50 per person.....and she has money for that. her dress was bought by her mother....but she has no money for anything else. 

    For Flowers...thankfully I  came up with an Idea that she loves....I am going to make her paper flowers out of sheet music...She is a piano teacher, and he is a drummer in a band. 
    so yay! just saved a wack of cash there!!

    Thanks Ladies! 

  • you know what. I ordered most of my wedding things from etsy.com...very very reasonable prices.....i basically planned my wedding on my laptop...lol..but i saved bundles of money. instead of going to thoughs "wedding' shops that charge an arm and a leg.....check it out
  • Another fantastic website you can use is www.weddingchicks.com
    It has a bunch of how-to videos for do-it-yourself everything.
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