You can call it crazy

BubbsNBubbs

Wait...you are 21 and are engaged for the SECOND time.....

Sounds like you reeeeeallly want to get married.

stefaniewattie

whats the rush..? I dont have any comments about your age, I will be married at 22, Fi is 26. I dont see anything wrong with being married young.
The difference is that while im 22, we have lived on our own seperately (your still living with your grandparents) as well as together for 2 years now, we have a son, stable jobs, car payments, deal with finances together. We will have been together for 4 years when we get married, I learn new things about him every single day, the first 2 months of our relationship were easy! it was the 3 years after that, that tested us and our love for eachother!
You dont know us, you dont have to listen to anyone on here, but please be cautious. Get to know eachother, FIGHT - you need to, youd be surprised what kind of true colors come out in a person when your angry.. that person might not be someone you want to spend your life with?
Just...be cautious and tread lightly! I wish you luck!!

MiksChick23

I knew right away that FI was the man I was going to marry. I was 21 at the time too. I'd have run for the hills if he'd proposed so quickly. Men who hurry into marriage raise MAJOR red flags for me. What is the rush?!

Now, 7 years later, we're a few months away from our wedding. The initial "knowing" is SO VERY different than the confident knowing I have in my relationship now.

peachykeen26

I am a yound bride too. BUT, I have known my future husband for over 8 years now so we have literally grown up together.
Just be careful.

KJeffs

I agree with a lot of what has been said on here but my experince was verry different so I'm not sure what my advice would be. I met my husband at work, I was 18 and so was he. After our first date he told me he was going to ask me to marry him one day. 3 months later he did. We got married right after I turned 19. We had three children and the 16 years we had togeather were the best in my whole life. When we were 32 the Dr. told us he had stage 4 cancer and had two monthe to live, oue baby was 3 months old at the time.....When he died I thought my world ended!!! Now almost 6 yrs later I met an amazing man who loves all of us and makes me smile again Would I want my daughter to get married as young as me NO!! But I do not regret one min. I spent being his wife....I think it depends on the people and how much work you are willing to put into a marrage! What ever you decide...I wish you luck!!

Bett2012

I call you crazy, but not because of your ages, not because of the time length, but because of the combination of the two!

I'm young (21 and getting married in 2 months), but FI and I have been together for 5 years, we've been through lots of trials so far, which is great practice for all the trials that are coming our way.

Congrats though, I hope you continue to strengthen your relationship and give yourselves a chance to deal with life together before you actually tie the knot.

jemmini6

...and people wonder why the divorce rate is nearly 50%.

tinstarsunshine

well OP I think you have a good head on your shoulders.  You are open to communication, are taking pre-marital classes(best thing ever btw!) and have given yourself a healthy engagement period in which to further get to know your future spouse (though i remind you the old addage about never knowing someone until you live with them is totally true!!) I met my FI when I was your age and 7yrs later we are tying the knot.  We grew together and its been amazing to see how much we have changed and matured.  We learned compromise, save money, and how to think of each other first.  The most trying and angsty time has actually been planning the wedding!  I cant wait till this craziness is over!  Anyhow I wish you the best!

norweigan

Idk. Me and my FI got engaged after 7 months.
My uncle proposed to my aunt on the second date and they have been incredibly happily married for 40 years. My mom was 19 when she married my dad, and they have also been incredibly happliy married for 35 years. Those two marriages honestly have been the best marriages I have ever seen.
I just don't think there are rules when it comes to who you marry. I'm definitely not saying rush into marriage, but I know that if you know, you know... just really make sure you know...

JamiesonCampbell

a little crazy but congrats!! i hope that it works out for you and you are happy

KSwen719

All of your personal experiences aside, making a marriage work at a young age is exceedingly more dificult than making it work at a later age.  Studies show that marriages before the age of 25 are TWICE AS LIKELY to end in divorce than marriages where the bride is older than 25, while brides over 30 have about an 8% divorce rate (I'm getting my Ph.D. in Sociology - we study these things).  So sure, you can say my uncle/aunt/mother/neighbor/whoever got married at 18 and is married for a gagillion years - but the truth is that those cases are the RARE exception to the rule.  And, generally speaking, younger brides are just significantly more likely to get divorced.  Does that mean you specifically will get divorced?  No, of course not, I don't know you or anyone else on here and can't predict that even if I do know you (though there is a psychologist who has amazing accuracy in prediciting which couples will get divorced - http://www.gottman.com/51326/Dr-John-Gottman.html).

And I'd just like to point out that, while I don't have any research to back up my next claim, I think we've all "been there" - we meet someone and we instantly think "this is the one!".  Sometimes, it's true, he is the one, and that's awesome.  But sometimes, probably much more often, he isn't the one.  You might just think he is, for a number of reasons - people put their best foot forward in the beginning, for one.  And, like another poster suggested, sometimes it might be a product of wishful thinking (since OP seems rather motivated to get married, being 21 and engaged TWICE already).  It is absolutely impossible to tell after two months whether this is the real deal or not, regardless of what you think.  You're blind if you see otherwise.  No one goes into a relationship thinking "Eh, this guy's ok".  Everyone thinks the guy is totally awesome in the beginning - otherwise, why would you be in the relationship at all?

So, in short, yes, I think you're crazy and, if you were my friend or relative, I would do everything in my power to stop you from making what I believe is a huge mistake.

[Deleted User]

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_just-engaged-proposals_you-can-call-it-crazy?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:683Discussion:e7f5069d-8144-4e2f-8056-ef17b929c1d1Post:0f825623-ae42-4b3b-b754-5b83b6d00d50">Re: You can call it crazy</a>:
[QUOTE]Wait...you are 21 and are engaged for the SECOND time..... Sounds like you reeeeeallly want to get married.
Posted by BubbsNBubbs[/QUOTE]

The first engagement wasn't real. It was just a guy saying One day Your gonna be my wife. Just to clear things up with that