I need help (MOH issue)

nikus88

So, I live out of state from where I was born and raised.  I don't have a lot of close friends due to this.  All of my friends from my home state I have really grown apart from and I never made real close friends where I live now.  So last winter I met someone throuhg my sons baseball team who I really clicked with ...her fiance went to high school with my fiance and our kids are in school together (we live in the same town). We all spent tons of time together and became great friends....so I asked her to be my MOH when I got engaged. Things were going so good but now I am scared that this friendship is fizzling out she she may be flaking out on me.  Now my friendship with her has not changed....I still consider her a very close friend and love her dearly, but she rarely contacts me anymore and seems to have found other people to hang out with, etc.  I defintiely want her as my MOH if she still wants that....so I guess my question is, do I wait this out a bit to get a feel for it, or do I ask her if everythign is ok?

What would others do in this situation?

Thank you,
Nikki

Ashelton09

If you feel like things are different, I would talk to her about it. I don't think anything bad would come from it! If something is wrong, maybe she just needs to talk about it. It might also be that she's unsure of how much you want her to be involved, or what you expect her duties as MOH to be. Go to lunch, and lightly bring it up. 

Good luck!

nikus88

Thank you for your response...that is exactly what I was thinking!

I guess another question would be how often are you in contact with "your" girls at this stage of the planning?! I  really am clueless about this stuff

RailWayWife

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_august-2013-weddings_i-need-help-moh-issue?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:0c4df628-5c86-4382-8f99-5d75e3f57aa4Discussion:7b92ae2a-98fb-47e7-afb7-758969a03ec9Post:c17d0e3d-dfd8-467d-82b1-104d036d300e">Re: I need help (MOH issue)</a>:
[QUOTE]Thank you for your response...that is exactly what I was thinking!<strong> I guess another question would be how often are you in contact with "your" girls at this stage of the planning?! I  really am clueless about this stuff :)</strong>
Posted by nikus88[/QUOTE]


I agree with the PP. I would lightly bring it up if it is bothering you.

Regarding the bolded part of your message. I am in contact with my girls almost daily, I am close with all of the girls I asked to be a part of my wedding. We rarely talk about the wedding as it is still 10 months out but I talk to them all on almost a daily basis.

Ashelton09

In reponse to your other question, my MOH is my best friend, so I am in contact with her constantly. My 3 BM's are my sister in law, and 2 close family friends. I am in contact with them maybe once a week. But, that being said, we don't talk much about the wedding stuff right now. I have a facebook group with all of them so if anybody has a question we just post it on there. I wouldn't worry about it too much right now. We still have a little ways to go!

Xstatic3333

That's hard, it stinks when it feels like a friend is drifting.  From what you said though, I think it likely has nothing to do with you or the wedding.  She could be hanging out with different people because she has developed new friendships, and this is probably no judgement on your friendship.  She also could just be busy, especially as a mom.  Hopefully if you have lunch together you'll figure out what is going on...I wouldn't mention the wedding stuff at first, just something like "how have you been? I feel like its been forever since we caught up!"

As for my bridal party, I'm not really involving them much in my actual planning.  A couple came dress shopping with me out of interest, which was great, and I've kept everyone up to date on my early thoughts about their dresses.  I just want them to have a blast at the wedding.  If I end up with any DIY projects that could use help I may share that with the ones who have expressed interest, but other than that I'm doing most of the actual planning with my FI and our moms.  Some of them are friends I talk to very frequently, and others are the type where we don't talk or see each other a lot, but when we do it's like no time has passed. 

Good luck, hope it all works out okay for you and your MOH!