Wedding Etiquette Forum

Faux Pas

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Re: Faux Pas

  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_faux-pas-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:05ed24f2-d197-46a8-98bf-d1ca611481f6Post:d9b0ceeb-680a-4365-a3c5-c499124b4b81">Re: Faux Pas</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Faux Pas : The registry info is not supposed to go on/in the WEDDING invitation, because it looks gift grabby and like you're assuming everyone will buy you a gift. <strong> It is totally acceptable to put registry info on/in a shower invite; as a shower is a gift-giving event. And to the other PP - the stores give those cards out because they couldn't care less how tacky you look to your family,</strong> they just want more people to come into their store.  Don't let anyone who's making money off the idea they're supporting influence whether you think it's etiquette appropriate or not.
    Posted by Kate61487[/QUOTE]

    <div>So, is it tacky to include them in the shower invites or not? First you said it was acceptable, then you said the stores don't care if you look tacky.</div>
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_faux-pas-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:05ed24f2-d197-46a8-98bf-d1ca611481f6Post:0f290431-b025-43f1-b0de-9d593e43da81">Re: Faux Pas</a>:
    [QUOTE]Also not a wedding, but I once went to an anniversary party at the back room at a restaurant where the only drink provided was water. The way I found this out was when I ordered a diet coke the waiter brought to me with a bill for $2. 
    Posted by HoorayForSoup[/QUOTE]

    <div>One of the many things I find appalling about these cash bars is that it seems like people don't even find out until they order their drink. I wonder how many people just say they don't have any cash and walk away. I know that would be rude, too, and two wrongs don't make a right, but it's gotta happen.</div>
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_faux-pas-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:05ed24f2-d197-46a8-98bf-d1ca611481f6Post:b2af7e84-6b64-47f2-a5b9-1991f7d3a38e">Re: Faux Pas</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Faux Pas : So, is it tacky to include them in the shower invites or not? First you said it was acceptable, then you said the stores don't care if you look tacky.
    Posted by AndreaJulia[/QUOTE]
    The stores DON'T care either way. That much is true.

    Etiquette-wise, though...
    Registry cards are good for shower invitations.
    Registry cards are not good for wedding invitations.
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  • Bridezilla called aunts and told them their husbands weren't classy enough for her wedding and that they shouldn't bring them.

    Another bride e-mailed 50 friends to-do lists and suggested monetary donations for her wedding "because she's new to wedding planning".

    Another bride told her guests how much each plate cost and that it was a rule that each guest cover their plate as a gift.
  • The one I have been the most personally hurt by was at my sister's wedding.  I was the maid of honor and was about 16 years old.  They had a head table, that they did not plan out at all.  The reception comes, we all go to sit up there, but there are not enough chairs for everyone.  A lot of the people in the wedding brought dates (NOT husbands/wives, I might add), but being a 16 year old I did not.  As a result, the head table consisted of quite a few people who deserved to be up there, and a whole bunch of dates, some of whom my sister and her husband had never met.  Now, this wouldn't have been a huge problem, if they had seated me as close to the head table as possible... But, no... I was seated at literally the furthest seat at the furthest table that I could be from them.  I couldn't hear toasts or anything.  And I was at the 'kids table' with a bunch of cousins who didn't like me.  Right by the exit.  It spoke pretty loudly and clearly to how they felt about me.

    Another ettiquette issue that I have come across frequently:  With the exception of 1 friend from high school... Every single wedding I have bought a gift for (whether I attended or not) in my adult life, I have never ever received a thank you note.  This seems very strange to me, especially now that I am writing my own thank you notes :)

    Oh, I was also once invited to a wedding that would require travel a little less than a month prior to the event.  They had set up an online way to RSVP (which I thought was sort of stupid anyway, but whatever), where you could pick your name out and select your rsvp.  Only, my name was not located anywhere, so I could not RSVP through their website.  I didn't have either of their e-mail addresses, so I was forced to RSVP via text.  It just made it pretty obvious that I was probably part of the C-list guest list, just being invited in the hopes of getting more gifts... Which, I did send... And did not receive a thank you note for, lol.

    Probably the last thing was the most ettiquette-crappy, but I was personally hurt by the first faux pas.
  • My friends got married last summer.  They're really good friends of mine, and are both now in my wedding party.  I love them dearly, they're like siblings to my fiancee and I.  But...

    1.) My friend asked me to be a bridesmaid shortly after her engagement, then took it back about a month later because she wanted to scale it back from 4 bridesmaids to 3.  She was really nice about it, I wasn't too worried.

    2.) Their registry info was included with the invitations.  Tacky, but whatever. It bothers me more now than before.

    3.) Also on the invites, was that it was a POTLUCK reception.  (They were trying to cut costs).  On our RSVPs, we had to write down what dish we were bringing.  Not only was their wedding on a Friday afternoon 1 hour away, I had to take EVEN MORE time off from work so I could cook something fresh for the reception, in addition to getting ready.  It was incredibly stressful.  I love my friends, but I didn't care for that.

    Also, the grooms sister invited me to the bridal shower.  I received the invitation the DAY before the shower.  Well obviously, I couldn't go because it was too short notice. My friend's found out later that this happened with several people. They felt so bad!
  • The worst i've ever seen is my cousin's invite situation. Everyone on the invite was titled Lord and Lady, except those invited. The registry cards were inside, along with an ecplanation of how ee could book rooms on their cruise ship in order to qualify the bride and groom for a free trip. When it ended up that the grandparents couldn't afford the cruise, there was a huge family scandal where my parents were expected to pay.
    Don't make me mobilize OffensiveKitten

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    Anniversary

  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_faux-pas-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:05ed24f2-d197-46a8-98bf-d1ca611481f6Post:22de697e-8dc4-43c9-9b1c-2c4d9b5e1dda">Re: Faux Pas</a>:
    [QUOTE]3.) Also on the invites, was that it was a POTLUCK reception.  (They were trying to cut costs).  On our RSVPs, we had to write down what dish we were bringing.  Not only was their wedding on a Friday afternoon 1 hour away, I had to take EVEN MORE time off from work so I could cook something fresh for the reception, in addition to getting ready.  It was incredibly stressful.  I love my friends, but I didn't care for that.
    Posted by wittykitty14[/QUOTE]

    No kidding you didn't care for that - that's terrible!  I'm assuming they weren't expecting gifts then?  I have never heard of this being done before - I would have been shocked!
  • I'm a bridesmaid for an upcoming wedding, and here are the biggest faux-pas that have happened so far.

    I heard about my friend's wedding via text message. She also asked me to be her bridesmaid in the same text message. At the time I hadn't even known she was engaged.

    A few hours after I got my text message, she announced that she was getting married on Facebook. From what I could tell, this was how she broke the news to her family.

    She hasn't sent her invitations out yet (the wedding is in a month).

    She may have invited all her Facebook friends to the ceremony (she DID invite them all to the reception), and has declared that the wedding will be outdoors and that if there aren't enough seats for everyone she's invited then people will just have to stand.

    I think the part that makes me so upset is that I want to be supportive and I want to be happy for her. It feels like she's treating me (and everyone else involved) like we have no lives outside of her wedding. That might be the biggest faux-pas of all.
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