Babies at wedding

[Deleted User]

I absolutely don't think youre wrong! A wedding ceremony is a seriously special moment of the wedding day and probably the most important part. The desire to have all attention focused on you and your soon to be husband, instead of a crying baby, is NOT unreasonable at all. It's YOUR wedding. You're allowed to do what you want. Really, weddings are a time for adult guests to focus on something other than their crazy lives (and their kids) for a few hours and celebrate you and your new husband! What you have to consider and try to understand though, is that even though your best man was chosen for a reason and he has an obligation AS the best man, his ULTIMATE obligation is to his family. If he cant stay the whole time, so what? He stood up there with you guys and participated in the most important part of the day with you. It probably wont ruin your evening if he's not there anyway. It's unfortunate that he might have to leave, but people do what they have to do. If I were in your place, I think I'd be ok with him leaving early. You might end up being in his situation some day :-)

And for the record, I keep seeing all these people giving you shi* for "not wanting babies at the ceremony because they might cry", though you never even mentioned being worried about the babies crying in your post. Is this like a giant game of elementary school telephone? You guys should get your facts straight before you harrass someone for asking an honest question that deserves an honest and unbiased answer. There's no need for people to get all defensive and crappy about it, just because they have children.

Basically, all I'm saying is, don't let the best man and his wife hold you emotionally hostage because of a baby. It's neither your fault, nor your problem that his wife will be breastfeeding at that time, and it is under no circumstances unreasonable to say "no babies" at your wedding! If the best man leaves, so what. You'll still have all the other groomsmen and bridesmaids there to celebrate with, and it'll still be one of the best days of your life, right? Be gracious, be honest and be forgiving. Hopefully you guys can come to an understanding!

[Deleted User]

I absolutely don't think youre wrong! A wedding ceremony is a seriously special moment of the wedding day and probably the most important part. The desire to have all attention focused on you and your soon to be husband, instead of a crying baby, is NOT unreasonable at all. It's YOUR wedding. You're allowed to do what you want. Really, weddings are a time for adult guests to focus on something other than their crazy lives (and their kids) for a few hours and celebrate you and your new husband! What you have to consider and try to understand though, is that even though your best man was chosen for a reason and he has an obligation AS the best man, his ULTIMATE obligation is to his family. If he cant stay the whole time, so what? He stood up there with you guys and participated in the most important part of the day with you. It probably wont ruin your evening if he's not there anyway. It's unfortunate that he might have to leave, but people do what they have to do. If I were in your place, I think I'd be ok with him leaving early. You might end up being in his situation some day :-)

And for the record, I keep seeing all these people giving you shi* for "not wanting babies at the ceremony because they might cry", though you never even mentioned being worried about the babies crying in your post. Is this like a giant game of elementary school telephone? You guys should get your facts straight before you harrass someone for asking an honest question that deserves an honest and unbiased answer. There's no need for people to get all defensive and crappy about it, just because they have children.

Basically, all I'm saying is, don't let the best man and his wife hold you emotionally hostage because of a baby. It's neither your fault, nor your problem that his wife will be breastfeeding at that time, and it is under no circumstances unreasonable to say "no babies" at your wedding! If the best man leaves, so what. You'll still have all the other groomsmen and bridesmaids there to celebrate with, and it'll still be one of the best days of your life, right? Be gracious, be honest and be forgiving. Hopefully you guys can come to an understanding!

vanderson01

It is YOUR day to have whatever YOU want! I have seen babies and young childten ruin weddings.... Screaming during the vows parents trying to console them rather then rush them out, children on the dance floor during first dances, etc. I'm not having children at my wedding either but that is my choice and I don't feel like I have to accomodate any guest that I don't truly want. I've come to the conclusion that if someone has an issue with my guest list then it is their right to graciously decline their invitation. People will understand and if they don't then they are being unreasonable, not you. Good luck on your special day:

emospeh

I 100 do not believe that babies or children have any business being at weddings. You're investing a lot of time, energy, emotion and money into this day. If people you invited cant leave their babies for that short amount of time, than they are selfish. I'm having an adult only ceremony and reception. NO KIDS AT ALL. I am arranging sitters for the parents to contact and make arrangements for the night. Your not asking them to kill their kids; you're simply asking that they go to an adult event.