Butthole move?

ricksang

I  bought poptarts for Ricky's ex's daughter because I thought she might want them for breakfast this weekend. I had no idea what she ate these days. She only stays with us 2 times a year. Well, she is 13 and worried about her weight (that is another issue), so she did not touch them.  Ricky said not to worry that he would eat them. I told him I didn't want him eating the damn poptarts. He has gained about 60 to 70 pounds since we have been together. I think it is beyond unhealthy for him to eat two poptarts a night for a snack. He already has a sh!tty diet. He also comments about how fat he is. I say nothing. I let him just do what he wants. I hid the poptarts. I will give them away. A$$hole move? I am starting to worry about his health.

sucrets4

DH insists on eating poptarts for breakfast.  One day I pointed out that the 200 cal serving size is for ONE and he was surprised.He still eats both of them.

sucrets4

To actually reply, I'd just return them and save $.  I don't think you're an a$$ for hiding them.  He can clearly survive without them.

temerityjane

I would call it... a justified a$$hole move.

jajph1974

Not an a$$hole move at all. I would (and have) done the same thing. About a year ago I started switching things out for "light" and healthier versions. He hasn't noticed yet :)Donate them to the food bank or something.

ricksang

I would not mind if his diet was otherwise healthy. But, this is a man who does not exercise, will not touch one veg with the exception of canned corn and green beans, and will not drink water. I am thinking, "Out of sight, out of mind?"

anna.oskar

A bit of a sneaky move but understandable. FI still hasn't realized that I switched his butter for country crock and I add ground turkey to dishes instead of beef. We gotta look out for our loved ones that seem to have a calorie and fat death wish.

tlv204

Not an @sshole move at all, IMO.  He'll live without the poptarts.

Sooles

guys are so DUMB about that stuff.i thought fi had gained about 20 lbs since weve been together (just over a year), turns out its more like FORTY POUNDS. in a year.im not even the one who cares, ive never said a thing about it, he is the one who sits there whining about how hes so fat now.well, i recently discovered that in the hour between when he gets home and i get home, he has been secretly making a meal every day. and when i say a meal i mean a 1000-2000 calorie fried meal. every day. and then i get home and make us dinner.yes, fi, you are getting fat. i wonder why???

Sooles

oh my god. that was long. sorry, i guess i needed to get that out

ricksang

So true Anna. Ha! The are sneaky aren't they Soole? I hope I got your name right?

mwhitson14

Totally understandable. I'm going to have to start switching out some of FI's high-calorie food stuff when I'm in control of the grocery-buying

bel138

I don't think that's bad. I simply refuse to buy junk in the first place since he won't eat a meal, and instead picks at crap all day. And I would eat it too if it were in the house. I have no self control.It's really difficult, though, to tell FI to be healthy when he's on the road 3/4 of the time. At home, he's happy to eat all my Cooking Light recipes because I try to make adventurous, flavorful things. On the road, he just stuffs his face with McDonald's and TGIFriday's. And doesn't have time to work out, since he has to be on site all day in case the merchandise fails. He's gained about 40 pounds since starting this job.

ricksang

What really bothers me is that he KNOWS better. I am always repeating the stuff I learn in my nutrition and science classes. I wonder what exactly will get him to eat better?

mocha beans

Butthole move, not really.  I do that to FI about seconds.  I'll put things away as soon as the plates are served.  Otherwise he'll like something and have a second serving, but he won't if it's already packed up and in the fridge.He's gotta start somehwere, might as well be with PopTarts.

ricksang

Good, I don't want to be a nagging wife

AmoroAgain

Has he had his cholesterol checked? That scared my FI into eating better.  Otherwise, I think it will take a big scare, like a heart attack to fully convince him that he shouldn't eat carbonara 3 times a week.

PandaBurr

My boyfriend is about 60 lbs overweight. I make him low calorie meals, with leftovers to take for lunch, but he always always forgets to grab a lunch and so he buys lunch instead.

mandysmear

I hid stuff from mike and give him flack all the time.  He has high(er) cholesterol and the doctor said he should take care of it while he's young.  He's skinny so people always think I am so controlling.  He eats so much too it's unreal. 

ricksang

No Amoro, but he needs to. I bet it is pretty high.

AmoroAgain

Well, it's a sticky situation because FI's cholesterol wasn't high until recently, even though he was a little overweight.  But, you should have it checked anyway. 

mocha beans

See, FI will swing to either extreme.  Either he'll eat way too much, and then be full and cranky.  Or he won't eat enough, with the foolish hopes that he'll lose weight.  I've been trying to beat it into his head for 5 years that starvation diet /= not healthy way to lose weight.  His starvation diet attempts have obviously not been successful.

julezlee

How could I think you're a butthole with such a cute bunny in your pic? But seriously, no, not a butthole move. I get really annoyed with FI when he overeats. He's a big guy and I've learned to accept that, but when you eat so much you're totally sick later, I'm gonna get on you about it.

ricksang

I am going to talk to him aout it. He is the most hard headed person I have ever met. When you look up "Set in his ways" in the dictionary, there is my husband waving.

mandysmear

Yeah Mike is like 180 pounds and his cholesterol is high for his age, weight, etc.  Sometimes being overweight doesn't mean anything

julezlee

As soon as we're married and FI's on my insurance his butt is going straight to the doctor for a check up.

jilybeans4

Butthole move would have been to tell him he can't eat them because he is fat. What you did was not butthole, it was just doing something to help someone you care about. My FI is the same way...he eats the worst crap for snacks and eats fast food almost every day for lunch. He's a big guy so he carries he weight well, but I do worry that it will catch up with his health eventually.

ricksang

How could I think you're a butthole with such a cute bunny in your pic? Haha true.Mocha, a lot of people still have that eat very little=lose weight mindset. It is crazy. My H totally overeats when I cook things he loves. Then he can't move for an hour :/I feel like I am trash talking him, but I am very worried.

AmoroAgain

Sorry Mandy, I didn't mean for it to sound like that.  I just meant that for Ang, having her H get his cholesterol checked could be a double edged sword.  FI didn't have high cholesterol until recently, after he's lost about 10 pounds.  NOW he's running in the high zone.  His sister is a vegan and has suuuper high cholesterol and always has. 

mocha beans

Yep, that's pretty much him.  Hence why I put leftovers away immediately, and make him eat something for dinner, even if it's just a small sandwich.  Can't do anything about his lunch denial, but I do what I can the rest of the time.

ricksang

Butthole move would have been to tell him he can't eat them because he is fat. Yeah that would be really sh!tty.  I would never tell him he is fat. I know how hurtful that would be. People at work always point out how much weight he has gained and that, "The little lady must be feeding you well." Grrr. It isn't my fault a$$wipes!