Guest list help...

therickson

Hi ladies I was hoping for a bit of honest advice so I came here... First off my parents graciously and wonderfully offered to host our wedding reception. With this I have been giving them final decision on basically everything... When we were origianally looking for places I asked FI family for their guest list number(whatever size it may be). They told me 40 people and I added that to my parents numbers and the numbers of FI and I... A few weeks ago FMIL gave me her list of people to send STD's to, and this list had 80 people on it... Where this list got doubled I will never know. This list puts us over our venue limit by the 40 people we had not accounted for. Obviously we know that not everyone will attend we really wanted to be under the limit so everyone is in the same room (that our limit put us in multiple rooms was something I did not know about until after our deposit was paid) (Sorry trying to sum this up.. )Is it wrong of me to want them to cut people out of their guest list since they did not account for them in the beginning? I don't want my parents to have to cut back on our family and their friends that they accounted for when we picked the place since they picked it based on the numbers that they had from FILs... My idea was to send announcements to international guests that will most likely not come to help ease the numbers just in case... Am I just being a B!tch here? Long story short.. FILs doubled their guest list after the deposit was paid on the venue - people cannot fit... Where do we cut people? I posted about this a few months ago on my local board but this issue has yet to be resolved and I am sick of stressing out!

sammi1285

What is your limit and how many people are you/FI and your parents inviting? If the numbers aren't similar, I would see about cutting some off of your lists too. I only mean this as like, you and your parents are inviting 200 people but his parents are only inviting 40. I would have a B list. I know we all hate them but this may be a good situation for one. Plus, yes, everyone should prepare for 100% attendance but in general it is not likely. We sent out our invites to 130 people just on Friday and already about 10 people have let me know they cannot come.

danieliza1127

I would just talk to your FILs and tell them what's up.  Tell them that their original list only had 40 people on it, so your parents picked the venue based on that and now they're giving you a list with 80 and unfortunately the venue just doesn't have the space for that.  So with that, ask them to cut the list back to 40.  Suggest your idea about just sending announcements to international people.  If you don't feel comfortable having this conversation with them, have your FI do it since they're his parents or have your parents do it since they are the ones paying for everything.