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5 year old daughter in wedding-thoughts/ideas?

My 5 year old daughter is going to be a flower girl in my wedding and she absolutely adores her future step-father. He is an amazing man and so wonderful to both of us. To FI and I, a marriage that involves a family (mother and daughter) should have her included. He isn't just gaining a wife, he's getting a daughter too.Anyone else have this and how did you handle it or plan to handle it? This man loves this child like she is his own and she loves him like he is her father. She loves her father too, and I have made sure to assure her that it is ok to love them both, that it won't take anything away from either one of them.Help?

Re: 5 year old daughter in wedding-thoughts/ideas?

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    I think it's a cute idea to include your daughter in the wedding!
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    What's your question?  You're including her - she's the flower girl. Are you asking how to include her in the ceremony itself?
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    I think if you google family vows or something, you can find a ceremony for new step-parents and their future step-children. Then she can be involved in the ceremony.When my cousin and her husband got married, her kids were about 8 and 5. Kevin sat down with them on the steps during the ceremony with them, and promised to always be there when they needed to talk or needed a friend to play with, to take care of them and keep them safe, and to love them forever. There was no mention of him being a stand-in father (even though he is). It was just a really sweet, simple ceremony, and the kids felt so special. They gave him huge hugs at the end of it, told him they loved him, and brought the whole church to tears :)
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    I think it's cool to have her as the FG, and maybe participate in a sand cermeony or something, but please, please, PLEASE do not ask him to say vows to her and her to say vows to him.  I've heard of moms thinking that sounds oh so cute, but it's not.  It's just creepy.
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    I think her being the flower girl is an excellent plan. I was a bridesmaid in my mom's second wedding and it didn't change anything between my father and I.
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    Honestly, I think it is creepy when people try to make their kids say vows or whatever during a marriage ceremony.  I also think it's a little disrespectful to her biological father. The wedding ceremony should be between two consenting adults.  It's nice that you want to include her and I think having her as FG is great.  I would maybe have him give her a special necklace or something before or after the ceremony.  But beyond that...being FG is enough, IMO.
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    It doesn't sound like you really need help, have you gotten any negative feedback from your family or something? I think it's a fine idea, and how great that she has such a good relationship with your FI.
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    To clarify, being a FG and that alone.  I've never heard of child/parent vows...
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    She is in the wedding, but we want to make her part of the ceremony because she is a part of our family unit. She already refers to the three of us as family. She will often take his hand to cross the street/parking lot before she reaches for mine and she is forever running to him to give him hugs and kisses...she plants more than a few on me too!!! She is in the wedding but so are 5 other women. We want her to feel extra special.
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    Okay, yeah, no vows from the child, that's weird.But I really liked what my cousin did. It wasn't a big formal thing, but it made the kids feel like they were part of the decision to become a family. Plus, they love Kevin, so they felt really special :)
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    My step-daughter is going to be a junior BM and my step son will be the ring-bearer.  As my niece and nephew will be in the WP as well we are also looking at a sand ceremony to have something special for them.  No vows though!  That sounds very creepy.
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    Yeah, maybe do a sand ceremony, if that's your thing. But seriously, I'm sure your daughter is cute and gives him lots of hugs and kisses and shiit but don't turn your wedding into a showcase for her.  
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    Boo on little girl vows.  If you want she could stand with you or something while you say your vows, but anything other than that would be weird. 
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    A sand ceremony or a giving her a special piece of jewelry sounds nice.  I agree that the vows would be too creepy.
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    We aren't planning any vows or anything (definitely can be creepy) but I like the jewelry idea and the post from the soon to be Mrs Vogt.  We even steered away from the flower girl dresses that look like wedding dresses...they even had veils!!! Icky. Thank you for your input, ladies. As always, much appreciated!!!
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    Laura, my niece (well, H's niece) was my FG, and her mom was determined to get her a dress to match mine, with a train, a tiara, and a veil.I successfully talked her out of the veil, bought her a dress that coordinates but doesn't match, and had the train cut off. I couldn't talk her out of the tiara though. I'm so glad to hear you're not into making your daughter a mini-bride :) I'm sure whatever you do for her will make her feel special and included. Sounds like you're marrying a great guy.
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    Okay. I'm going against the grain here, but we are doing vows for my son who will be 5 at the time. FI is the only father that Ben has ever known. He was part of the proposal and is beyond excited to be part of the wedding. We do consider it to be a family thing and have found some very short, cute vows for him to recite. He will also be the ring bearer.
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    Thank you cew515. I am sure your little man will be a big hit and feel very special.
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